• Welcome to Smashboards, the world's largest Super Smash Brothers community! Over 250,000 Smash Bros. fans from around the world have come to discuss these great games in over 19 million posts!

    You are currently viewing our boards as a visitor. Click here to sign up right now and start on your path in the Smash community!

Quotes

T

TedBoosley

Smash Ace
Joined
Dec 19, 2006
Messages
657
Location
Orlando, Florida
This thread is intended for pure comedy in quote form, be it AIM, IRC, real-life quotes, whatever.

You guys better not fail me, in the other online community I'm part of, the quotes thread is like the best one on the entire forum.

I'll get us started.

(3:35:09 AM) DGuy6789: You can never have too many 18 year old blondes lined up
(3:35:13 AM) Justin: haha seriously.
(3:35:23 AM) Justin: SPEAKING OF HOT GIRLS FROM HIGH SCHOOL
(3:35:29 AM) Justin: I DROPPED THE *censored* BALL LAST NIGHT :<
(3:35:38 AM) DGuy6789: You told her you played marth in melee didn't you
(3:35:39 AM) DGuy6789: ahahahaha
(3:35:40 AM) Justin: I seriously could have had sex with like a high school fantasy of mine
(3:35:43 AM) Justin: but I -failed-
(3:35:45 AM) Justin: and no :p
(3:35:47 AM) DGuy6789: Oh
(3:35:51 AM) DGuy6789: You didn't say jiggs did you?
(3:35:51 AM) DGuy6789: XD
(3:35:54 AM) Justin: :O
(3:36:00 AM) DGuy6789: Just tell her you play falcon
(3:36:02 AM) DGuy6789: She will be like
(3:36:05 AM) DGuy6789: Let's go to your house
(3:36:07 AM) Justin: lmao
 
dguy6789

dguy6789

Smash Lord
Joined
Jun 25, 2006
Messages
1,585
Location
San Antonio, TX
(3:35:01 AM) Justoid64: I just gorged on cheez-its
(3:35:04 AM) Justoid64: and now have hicups
(3:35:05 AM) Justoid64: this sucks
 
R

Rohins

Smash Lord
Joined
Mar 18, 2006
Messages
1,585
Location
Winter Park, FL
NNID
Rohins
As quoted from my dear little trillian log:

HTHrulesatSSBM: butt ****** jail
HTHrulesatSSBM: I dont know about you... but I like my butt **** free
Rohins: ...
 
C@sH Mooney

C@sH Mooney

Smash Master
Joined
Apr 4, 2007
Messages
3,721
Location
Probably playing TF2.
cash mooney69 (6:34:48 PM): so yeah, you need to come to an american tourney and show us your pro comeback skillz.
NihonjinII (6:36:30 PM): I wish it was that simple
NihonjinII (6:36:55 PM): It costs money
NihonjinII (6:37:00 PM): And Im in school
cash mooney69 (6:36:56 PM): tru
cash mooney69 (6:36:58 PM): oh
cash mooney69 (6:37:00 PM): =(
NihonjinII (6:37:05 PM): and not too rich >_<
cash mooney69 (6:37:02 PM): lol
cash mooney69 (6:37:05 PM): your amsah. and you live in amsterdam.
cash mooney69 (6:37:07 PM): be a man whore
cash mooney69 (6:37:10 PM): I'm sure the red light district would hire a pro smasher.
cash mooney69 (6:37:11 PM): =D
NihonjinII (6:37:18 PM): LOL
 
TheReflexWonder

TheReflexWonder

Wonderful!
BRoomer
Joined
Feb 10, 2005
Messages
13,704
Location
Atlanta, GA
NNID
TheReflexWonder
3DS FC
2492-4449-2771
<Zanto> oh, and Pichu didn't get booted, he evolved
<Raven> then there should be two pikachus
<Raven> on the roster
<Zanto> Mewtwo evolved into Lucario
<Raven> you dubmass
<Mushroom> Pika got booted
<Zanto> and ate the first Pikachu
<Raven> shuttup Mushroom
<Raven> >:/
<Mushroom> you shaddup
<Raven> lucario also learned martial arts from pokemon trainer IAN GARVEY
<Zanto> and Roy was like "lol wut" and evolved into Ike
<Raven> what
<Raven> no Zanto
<Raven> just no
<Zanto> yeah
<Raven> Roy sucks too much to evolve into Ike
<Raven> they're two completely different beings
<Raven> COMPLETELY
<Raven> you see
<Zanto> nope, they used a sone
<Raven> Ike doesn't get OHKO'd by
<Zanto> stone
<Raven> wyvern lords in the hardest chapter in the game
<Raven> namely, near the end of the chapter
<Raven> Roy, however, does
<Raven> >:/
<Raven> >:///////////////
<Zanto> Super Badass Hyper Mega Chuck Norris Infused Stone
<Zanto> guarentied to make things that suck not suck
<Raven> that suck massively do the exact opposite
<Raven> they get sucked, instead of doing the actual sucking
<Raven> which means they are uber
<Zanto> exactly
<Raven> also
<Raven> was roy low tier because he had massive lag and no tmuch power to make up for it?
<Zanto> that and his morbid air game
<Raven> because the middle of his blade did less damage than the tip of marth's blade?
<Zanto> yeah
<Raven> yeah they really don't like roy in nintendo do they
* wergoheb has quit (Ping timeout)
<Zanto> Appaerantly not
<Raven> they make him one of the most unreliable lords ever and one of the worst chars in melee
<Raven> and cut him from brawl
<Zanto> That's why Ike is here
<Raven> indeed
<Raven> Ike's the most reliable lord ever in fact
<Raven> with the most badassery ever exhibited
<Raven> he sin't some goody goody
<Raven> some goody two shoes prince or noble or whatever
<Zanto> I don't know about that Ray
<Raven> he's a mercenary that WORKED his way up
<Zanto> Apparently, he fights ofr his friends
<Zanto> *for
<Raven> because if his friends are alive, he gets more money
<Raven> duh
<Zanto> right
<Zanto> good catch
<Raven> mercenaries are basically hookers that fight instead of do that stuff
<Turner> XDDDDD
<Raven> while hookers may be bad
<Zanto> and are legal too, odly
<Raven> mercenaries are often badass
<Turner> And they don't have pimps
<Raven> no but they have employers
<Raven> which is basically a mercenary's pimp
<Raven> someone chatlog this
<Zanto> and they get to have awesome blue hair and a headband rivaling even Snake's
<Raven> this is a thousand times better than most of the convos in that topic
Click to expand...
(This is me, quoting, because it looks better that way.)
 
Renth

Renth

Smash Hero
Joined
Sep 8, 2005
Messages
5,938
Location
Colver, PA
Derf and I on aim

Kano2020: dude brawl sucks

Renth13: it's like trying to replace a dog, it's just not the same

Kano2020: its like trying to replace a dog with a stuffed dog
 
-Chad-

-Chad-

Slackerator
Joined
Nov 10, 2005
Messages
2,718
Location
Southaven, Mississippi
[22:44:14] Chaddical: So..what the hell else do you do besides play smash and look like Jesus?
[22:44:26] N64: walk on water
[22:44:32] N64: breakdance on water
[22:44:50] Chaddical: Yeah yeah miracles, I got that
[22:45:16] N64: i'm majoring in computer science
[22:45:39] N64: oh, and i also pretend to be awesome
[22:46:10] Chaddical: Pretend?
[22:46:32] N64: ok ok
[22:46:35] N64: i'm really super awesome
[22:47:07] Chaddical: Do you pretend you're like..a super hero?
[22:47:16] N64: occasionally
[22:47:30] Chaddical: Do you wear a cape too
[22:47:56] N64: not so much
[22:48:11] N64: capes can be kinda expensive
[22:48:21] N64: especially if you want them to be flameproof or something
[22:48:33] Chaddical: True true
[22:49:04] Chaddical: So by that comment I take it you don't pretend you have superpowers? More of a Batman type thing?
[22:51:08] N64: well
[22:51:10] N64: i can stop time
[22:51:18] N64: and climb walls
[22:51:31] Chaddical: That's broken
[22:51:44] N64: yeah
[22:51:49] N64: i'm banned in most tournaments
[22:52:06] Chaddical: Pretend super hero tournies?
[22:52:07] Chaddical: I want in
[22:52:34] N64: teams?
[22:52:54] N64: I'm Talks-too-quietly Man
[22:54:20] Chaddical: They call me Slacker Slim 'cause I'm a slacker and I'm really skinny
[22:55:39] Chaddical: I have lots of powers but I'm too lazy to use them
[22:55:47] N64: nice
 
A

ama(m/t)

Smash Lord
Joined
Dec 30, 2007
Messages
1,174
the only one i found remotely humorous was the renth one

the funny things in this topic may be funny, but they fall flat on their face without a proper delivery

i don't think anything in this topic has gotten past the first step yet though, or if it did, it was totally overshadowed by the delivery failure.
 
C@sH Mooney

C@sH Mooney

Smash Master
Joined
Apr 4, 2007
Messages
3,721
Location
Probably playing TF2.
-Chad- said:
[22:44:14] Chaddical: So..what the hell else do you do besides play smash and look like Jesus?
[22:44:26] N64: walk on water
[22:44:32] N64: breakdance on water
[22:44:50] Chaddical: Yeah yeah miracles, I got that
[22:45:16] N64: i'm majoring in computer science
[22:45:39] N64: oh, and i also pretend to be awesome
[22:46:10] Chaddical: Pretend?
[22:46:32] N64: ok ok
[22:46:35] N64: i'm really super awesome
[22:47:07] Chaddical: Do you pretend you're like..a super hero?
[22:47:16] N64: occasionally
[22:47:30] Chaddical: Do you wear a cape too
[22:47:56] N64: not so much
[22:48:11] N64: capes can be kinda expensive
[22:48:21] N64: especially if you want them to be flameproof or something
[22:48:33] Chaddical: True true
[22:49:04] Chaddical: So by that comment I take it you don't pretend you have superpowers? More of a Batman type thing?
[22:51:08] N64: well
[22:51:10] N64: i can stop time
[22:51:18] N64: and climb walls
[22:51:31] Chaddical: That's broken
[22:51:44] N64: yeah
[22:51:49] N64: i'm banned in most tournaments
[22:52:06] Chaddical: Pretend super hero tournies?
[22:52:07] Chaddical: I want in
[22:52:34] N64: teams?
[22:52:54] N64: I'm Talks-too-quietly Man
[22:54:20] Chaddical: They call me Slacker Slim 'cause I'm a slacker and I'm really skinny
[22:55:39] Chaddical: I have lots of powers but I'm too lazy to use them
[22:55:47] N64: nice
Click to expand...
That's just awesome. lolol
 
Monk/Honkey/Banana

Monk/Honkey/Banana

Smash Champion
Joined
Oct 4, 2006
Messages
2,526
Location
Dunedin, FL(MWFL)
Some kid at school: Dude this guy challenged me to a MM and he said he doesn't even know how to use pit's up-b

Me: you're going to win right?

Other guy: I'd laugh so hard if he was just hustling you

Another guy: in the middle of the match he just rips off his face and turns out be Isai
 
pesticide

pesticide

Smash Lord
Joined
Dec 24, 2006
Messages
1,028
Location
Switching mains? in CFL
-Chad- said:
[22:44:14] Chaddical: So..what the hell else do you do besides play smash and look like Jesus?
[22:44:26] N64: walk on water
[22:44:32] N64: breakdance on water
[22:44:50] Chaddical: Yeah yeah miracles, I got that
[22:45:16] N64: i'm majoring in computer science
[22:45:39] N64: oh, and i also pretend to be awesome
[22:46:10] Chaddical: Pretend?
[22:46:32] N64: ok ok
[22:46:35] N64: i'm really super awesome
[22:47:07] Chaddical: Do you pretend you're like..a super hero?
[22:47:16] N64: occasionally
[22:47:30] Chaddical: Do you wear a cape too
[22:47:56] N64: not so much
[22:48:11] N64: capes can be kinda expensive
[22:48:21] N64: especially if you want them to be flameproof or something
[22:48:33] Chaddical: True true
[22:49:04] Chaddical: So by that comment I take it you don't pretend you have superpowers? More of a Batman type thing?
[22:51:08] N64: well
[22:51:10] N64: i can stop time
[22:51:18] N64: and climb walls
[22:51:31] Chaddical: That's broken
[22:51:44] N64: yeah
[22:51:49] N64: i'm banned in most tournaments
[22:52:06] Chaddical: Pretend super hero tournies?
[22:52:07] Chaddical: I want in
[22:52:34] N64: teams?
[22:52:54] N64: I'm Talks-too-quietly Man
[22:54:20] Chaddical: They call me Slacker Slim 'cause I'm a slacker and I'm really skinny
[22:55:39] Chaddical: I have lots of powers but I'm too lazy to use them
[22:55:47] N64: nice
Click to expand...
ROFL that was hilarious!
 
D

derf

Smash Ace
Joined
Jun 1, 2005
Messages
881
Location
gainesville, fl
haha no manko. obv an exaggeration. i do find smashboards takes 1-3 seconds to load sometimes if i dont disable images though
 
C@sH Mooney

C@sH Mooney

Smash Master
Joined
Apr 4, 2007
Messages
3,721
Location
Probably playing TF2.
Monk/Honkey/Banana said:
Some kid at school: Dude this guy challenged me to a MM and he said he doesn't even know how to use pit's up-b

Me: you're going to win right?

Other guy: I'd laugh so hard if he was just hustling you

Another guy: in the middle of the match he just rips off his face and turns out be Isai
Click to expand...
lol, whos the another guy? he obv plays smash
 
Caleb Wolfbrand

Caleb Wolfbrand

Smash Master
Joined
Sep 6, 2005
Messages
3,443
Location
Ionia (Charleston, SC)
I could fill this up with EverlastingYay but I'll keep it brief.


everlastingyayuh: IF YOU HAD A HUNDRED AND ONE
everlastingyayuh: ****ING DYNAMITE STICKS IN THE BACK OF A DUMP TRUCK
everlastingyayuh: WITH ME AND TRC IN TEH BACK
everlastingyayuh: AND SET THEM OFF
everlastingyayuh: WE'D STILL BE BACK THERE ****** ****

*week later*

everlastingyayuh: U NO WAT??
everlastingyayuh: I DONE TOLD YA'LL MOTHER ****ERS
everlastingyayuh: IF YOU'RE NOT A SMASHER
everlastingyayuh: THEN DON'T TRY TO ACT LIKE
everlastingyayuh: A SMASHER
Rage of Kira: wait
Rage of Kira: what
everlastingyayuh: GO DO SOME
everlastingyayuh: MOTHER ****ING TECH PRACTICE OR SOMETHING
everlastingyayuh: DO SOME
everlastingyayuh: LEDGE TECHING OR SOMETHING
Rage of Kira: : (
everlastingyayuh: YOU SEE
everlastingyayuh: IF YOU HAD
everlastingyayuh: MOTHER ****ING
everlastingyayuh: 101 STICKS OF DYNAMITE IN THE BACK OF A DUMP TRUCK
everlastingyayuh: WITH ME AND TRC IN THE BACK
everlastingyayuh: AND YOU BLEW THEM ****S UP
everlastingyayuh: ME AND TRC WOULD STILL BE BACK THERE
everlastingyayuh: TELLING YOU TO TAKE THIS ****
everlastingyayuh: WHEN THE SMOKE CLEARED
everlastingyayuh: GOT****IT
everlastingyayuh: I DONE TOLD YOU
everlastingyayuh: GOT****IT
everlastingyayuh: FOR REAL


it's worth mentioning that nothing ever brings this on. he just randomly messages like this. and singing "What is love?" by Haddaway.

Yeah. By the way I thought most of what was said was funny or at least amusing. ^_^
 
exarch

exarch

doot doot doot
Joined
Feb 15, 2005
Messages
3,333
Location
Usually not playing Brawl. Location: Enterprise
(02:30:29 PM) Thomas: better start warming up for the tournament
(02:30:30 PM) Thomas: oh wait
(02:30:33 PM) Thomas: it's brawl
(02:30:39 PM) Mark: lollolol
(02:30:42 PM) Thomas: there's no warm up necessary
(02:30:47 PM) Thomas: nvm
(02:30:49 PM) Mark: warm up tech skill
(02:30:54 PM) Mark: go practice those ink drops
(02:31:13 PM) Thomas: actually the warm up i might need to do
(02:31:20 PM) Thomas: is go remember the movesets for characters
(02:31:35 PM) Thomas: i never play this game i don't even know how to throw pikmin with olimar
(02:31:42 PM) Mark: me either.
 
dguy6789

dguy6789

Smash Lord
Joined
Jun 25, 2006
Messages
1,585
Location
San Antonio, TX
Zink: Just remember, Lucario's pretty much a chill guy, so whenever you want you can just bro out on the walls, ready to attack at any time.
 
S

Shadowex3

Smash Apprentice
Joined
May 29, 2007
Messages
127
Location
Down the street from Gigs
A while back before brawl was released boredom kicked in and I randomly IMed Noishe (fox main) at about 4am.

shadowtpf: SHIELDGRAB UPTHROW UPTHROW UPTHROW UPTHROW UPTHROW UPTHROW UPTILT UPTILT FSMASH!
Noishe: NOOOO! **** YOU MARTH!
 
C@sH Mooney

C@sH Mooney

Smash Master
Joined
Apr 4, 2007
Messages
3,721
Location
Probably playing TF2.
Cash Mooney69 (12:07:45 AM): a swd is useful
SS ChowderPot (12:07:47 AM): unless your Wes
SS ChowderPot (12:07:49 AM): it isn't
Cash Mooney69 (12:07:49 AM): for mindgames
Cash Mooney69 (12:08:00 AM): phanna does it all the time
Cash Mooney69 (12:08:03 AM): well
SS ChowderPot (12:08:08 AM): Phanna isn't a person
Cash Mooney69 (12:08:08 AM): hes just technical
Cash Mooney69 (12:08:11 AM): yeah he is
SS ChowderPot (12:08:13 AM): He is an extension of his controller
 
C

Col Bol

Smash Champion
Joined
Aug 1, 2006
Messages
2,112
Location
Casselberry, FL
cash mooney69 (11:13:21 PM): sandbaging is where its at =D
Gimpyfish62 (11:13:37 PM): cash mooney only good players sandbag
 
You must log in or register to reply here.
Top Bottom