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My life is very F*cked up

Charmander

Smash Champion
Joined
Jan 4, 2010
Messages
2,015
Location
The Middle Pokeball
NNID
JoeThorpedo
Link to original post: [drupal=3319]My life is very F*cked up[/drupal]



Okay, My life is full of crazy, insane stuff.

When i was two...
I was playing with my grandmas dog, y'know, standard two year old right?
Well the dog was kinda old and irritable.
I pulled the dogs tail(I was Two, I didn't know any better)
The dog pretty much tore my face apart.
After my face got sewn back together, I had a couple bald spots from the attack.
I also found an odd marking made from the stitches.
It was Jesus's cross.
It looked exactly like it, down to the nails on the cross.
Its a little more distorted now, but its still there.


Then I moved to Gansevoort.
Nice place, calm, freindly.
There is a house only two houses away.
The strange part is not only does no one live there, but people unrelated to the previous owners tend to the lawn.
There are Trees, they look a bit like this
http://www.make-my-own-house.com/images/arborvitae1.jpg

Whats weird is just last summer,in one day the bottom part of the tree was dead, no leaves. Yet the top flourished with green, and is still the same way now.
People Say its haunted and some bullcrap like that, but it never bothered me.


Then things got interesting.

Just last week, My friend dares me to go look through the basement window in the back of the house.
Since no one currently owns the house, its allowed.
I said "sure, its just an old house -__-"
We look in the window and I see something odd.

It looks like an over-sized bird cage, just big enough to hold a large person.

This was different though, The cage was covered with rust, Had Spikes on the inside of it, contained shackles, and had some sort of crank next to it.

I didn't really like seeing that, it looked pretty bad.

We go back to the house, just this Thursday.
I go to look at the window when i notice that the window was gone. No opening of any kind. There was no evidence to even signify it even existed.

Shocked and disappointed, I turn to go home, I almost trip on something pinkish brown. I looked like a burned peice of meat, the size of a grown mans arm.
I look to see what it is connected to.
I run as soon as I notice what it is.
It was a corpse, big boned with charred hair still intact.
The image of the body is burned in my head.
It was large, appeared to be burned, had charred, long hair and was on its side, simply there, next to where the window once stood.
I Turn around, the body is gone, No trace at all.
I ask my friend if he saw it, to see if I was just imagining it or not. He saw it.

The worst part is is that house is for sale.






I only have one thing to say....

WHAT THE HELL?!?!?!?!?
 
Joined
May 3, 2009
Messages
7,190
You've been sinning a lot without confessing and now the Devil has inflicted you with a curse.

You will lose 1/4 HP every turn.
 

ndayday

stuck on a whole different plaaaanet
BRoomer
Joined
Jun 12, 2008
Messages
19,614
Location
MI
I read haunted house and thought



Then I read the rest.
Weird as hell. I've personally never seen anything weird like that, but I know some people who are really serious that they've seen creepy stuff.

Interesting read nonetheless.
 

El Nino

BRoomer
BRoomer
Joined
Jul 4, 2003
Messages
1,289
Location
Ground zero, 1945
It looks like an over-sized bird cage, just big enough to hold a large person.

This was different though, The cage was covered with rust, Had Spikes on the inside of it, contained shackles, and had some sort of crank next to it.

I didn't really like seeing that, it looked pretty bad.
Get off my lawn. And stop peeking into the windows.
 
D

Deleted member

Guest
Okay, that's really shocking there. A corpse in the yard? I was seriously not expecting that.
 

finalark

SNORLAX
Joined
Nov 23, 2007
Messages
7,829
Location
Tucson, Arizona
What was going through my head in order of the "paragraphs:"

1: Man, getting your face ripped up by a dog must suck....

2: Haunted? Haunted my ***.

3: Wait, an over-sized bird cage with a bunch of painful objects on it? The previous owner was obviously just a collector of torture devices I guess.

4: And later it was gone? Sounds like a thriller novel in the works.

5: Now it sounds like an episode of Case Closed.

6: Wow, that is really freaky. Wait, what does the dog have to do with any of this?
 

Tacel

Smash Lord
Joined
May 10, 2009
Messages
1,616
Location
PA
Wait, what does the dog have to do with any of this?
The dog was actually behind it all. I knew it!

That's seriously messed up. You need to write a horror story. Right now. With me. Now.
I can see it now. It will be called 665 HELL DRIVE. It will be a hit.
Seriously? Seriously. Quack.
 

Zajice

BRoomer
BRoomer
Joined
Feb 5, 2009
Messages
11,167
Location
Equestria
Link to original post: [drupal=3319]My life is very F*cked up[/drupal]



Okay, My life is full of crazy, insane stuff.

When i was two...
I was playing with my grandmas dog, y'know, standard two year old right?
Well the dog was kinda old and irritable.
I pulled the dogs tail(I was Two, I didn't know any better)
The dog pretty much tore my face apart.
After my face got sewn back together, I had a couple bald spots from the attack.
I also found an odd marking made from the stitches.
It was Jesus's cross.
It looked exactly like it, down to the nails on the cross.
Its a little more distorted now, but its still there.


Then I moved to Gansevoort.
Nice place, calm, freindly.
There is a house only two houses away.
The strange part is not only does no one live there, but people unrelated to the previous owners tend to the lawn.
There are Trees, they look a bit like this
http://www.make-my-own-house.com/images/arborvitae1.jpg

Whats weird is just last summer,in one day the bottom part of the tree was dead, no leaves. Yet the top flourished with green, and is still the same way now.
People Say its haunted and some bullcrap like that, but it never bothered me.


Then things got interesting.

Just last week, My friend dares me to go look through the basement window in the back of the house.
Since no one currently owns the house, its allowed.
I said "sure, its just an old house -__-"
We look in the window and I see something odd.

It looks like an over-sized bird cage, just big enough to hold a large person.

This was different though, The cage was covered with rust, Had Spikes on the inside of it, contained shackles, and had some sort of crank next to it.

I didn't really like seeing that, it looked pretty bad.

We go back to the house, just this Thursday.
I go to look at the window when i notice that the window was gone. No opening of any kind. There was no evidence to even signify it even existed.

Shocked and disappointed, I turn to go home, I almost trip on something pinkish brown. I looked like a burned peice of meat, the size of a grown mans arm.
I look to see what it is connected to.
I run as soon as I notice what it is.
It was a corpse, big boned with charred hair still intact.
The image of the body is burned in my head.
It was large, appeared to be burned, had charred, long hair and was on its side, simply there, next to where the window once stood.
I Turn around, the body is gone and my mom got scared and said "you're moving with your auntie and uncle in Bel-Air.

I whistled for a cab and when it came near, the license plate said "FRESH" and it had dice in the mirror. If anything, I could say that this cab was rare but I though, "Nah forget it, yo holmes to Bel-Air!"

I pulled up to the house about 7 or 8 and I yelled to the cabbie, "Yo holmes, smell ya later!" I looked at my kingdom, I was finally there, to sit on my throne, as the prince of Bel-Air.
I was really expecting it to end like this.
 

INSANE CARZY GUY

Banned via Warnings
Joined
May 14, 2008
Messages
6,915
Location
Indianapolis
You could be seeing things i've seen human sized poteoes dancing in my room before and i've once was talking to a bush for half an hour but what was odd was I wasn't talking like how I would talk I was talking really cool about how the bush has to be careful what it says to people, in a odd tone.
 

Charmander

Smash Champion
Joined
Jan 4, 2010
Messages
2,015
Location
The Middle Pokeball
NNID
JoeThorpedo
The dog was actually behind it all. I knew it!

That's seriously messed up. You need to write a horror story. Right now. With me. Now.
I can see it now. It will be called 665 HELL DRIVE. It will be a hit.
Seriously? Seriously. Quack.
you know, i was thinking of making a movie on this called "that house on Cardinal Lane" but I have to get to the bottom of this first.
 

Fuelbi

Banned via Warnings
Joined
Jun 17, 2009
Messages
16,894
Location
Also PIPA and CISPA
Dayumz boy. You unlucky or something. Reminds me of all the folklore latinos have. Like witches giving people curses or something. People finding pieces of crap in their houses, people finding ashes on their hands, etc. Although none of that stuff is as freaky as this...

I'm not the kind of guy to go religious here, but maybe talk to your priest and get him to do an exorcism or something...
 

Charmander

Smash Champion
Joined
Jan 4, 2010
Messages
2,015
Location
The Middle Pokeball
NNID
JoeThorpedo
Dayumz boy. You unlucky or something. Reminds me of all the folklore latinos have. Like witches giving people curses or something. People finding pieces of crap in their houses, people finding ashes on their hands, etc. Although none of that stuff is as freaky as this...

I'm not the kind of guy to go religious here, but maybe talk to your priest and get him to do an exorcism or something...
My preist lives forty hours away by car.....
Im jus liek WTF RLLY?!?
I NEED this on video/camera pics, it would be insane.
I was wondering what its like in there house, but **** ill never go in there....
 

Zajice

BRoomer
BRoomer
Joined
Feb 5, 2009
Messages
11,167
Location
Equestria
My preist lives forty hours away by car.....
Im jus liek WTF RLLY?!?
I NEED this on video/camera pics, it would be insane.
I was wondering what its like in there house, but **** ill never go in there....
Man up and get in there. Ghosts usually give you quite a few fair warnings before they get *****y and actually try to do anything to injure you.

At least in the movies.
 

prog

Priest of the Temple of Syrinx
Joined
Mar 11, 2008
Messages
2,155
Location
Brooklyn, NY
why did i read this before bed?

why am i watching the xfiles while reading this?

why am i not watching arrested development?
 

DtJ SmithZzz

Happy Birthday Kjell
Joined
Oct 4, 2009
Messages
5,885
Location
Raleigh, NC
Man up and get in there. Ghosts usually give you quite a few fair warnings before they get *****y and actually try to do anything to injure you.

At least in the movies.
What, play a loud, annoying instrument everytime they show any form of their body to make you jump as a fair warning?
 

Mota

"The snake, knowing itself, strikes swiftly"
Joined
Jul 19, 2008
Messages
4,063
Location
Australia | Melb
Entertaining read. Possibly didn't the need the whole dog ripping face part though.
 
S

smash brawl player 99021

Guest
Ohh! I know! Your Life Insurance company!
 

mzink*

Smash Ace
Joined
Mar 23, 2008
Messages
984
Location
MI
If the dog had behavioral issues your relatives should have known to not let you around it.
 

Mewter

Smash Master
Joined
Apr 22, 2008
Messages
3,609
Ghostbusters. -_-

Sounds creepy. Maybe you should hold up that scar of the cross when you walk by the house from now on. :p
 

EctoWarrior

Smash Rookie
Joined
May 2, 2010
Messages
0
nice description, sounds exactly like what you told me...and now i kinda wanna go see that house and record whatever we find. That would be awesome! :D
 
Joined
May 3, 2009
Messages
7,190
Here's my best advice I can give to you, charmander1065.

Go into the house.

Chances are there's a Suchubis in there. Just let it play with you and that cage, steal your soul, and get it over with.

Sure, you'll end up going to hell, but it gets rid of the problem at hand, amirite?
 

cookieM0Nster

Smash Champion
Joined
Mar 27, 2009
Messages
2,512
Location
oakland
Report it? To the police? So they can get a warrant? And break into the house? And shoot some dude in the head? And get sued? And go to jail? And break out? And eat donuts?


Seriously, report it. Like seriously.
 

Ninka_kiwi

Smash Ace
Joined
Dec 31, 2009
Messages
685
Yea I would not be surprised with how weird charmanders life is I wouldn't think twice if he told me a pig just attacked him XD
 
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