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Make your own Palutena's Guidance or Snake codec for your wanted characters!

Quillion

Smash Hero
Joined
Sep 17, 2014
Messages
5,674
And I'll archive them here! Here's a thread from pre-release.

Palutena's Guidance:
Pit: Lady Palutena, I thought you were the one with the staff around here, who's that?
Palutena: That's Krystal, a member of the Star Fox team.
Pit: Wait, if she's a fox then why is she blue?
Viridi: Ughh, so unnatural. Dyeing your fur is so bad for the enviroment.
Palutena: Anyway, unlike her teammates Krystal uses an ancient Magical staff to fight. It gives her wide range but it's sometime slow to swing around. Time your attacks carefully.

Pit: Those horns... This guy reminds me of Gaol.
Palutena: You needn't worry, Shovel Knight is a champion of Justice and Shovel-ry.
Pit: Shovel Knight? That's a bit on the nose.
Palutena: It may look like a simple spade but he can use his weapon to create pit traps and bounce of his foes heads.
Pit: That's like calling MArio "jumping plumber" or Kirby "eating blob".
Viridi: We get the point, "Kid Icarus"
Pit: Huh?

:4pit: Whoah, Lady Palutena! Check this guy out! His sword's on fire! ON FIRE!

:4palutena: That seems to be the case. And no wonder: that's Roy, the Prince of Pherae. He fought to save his homeland of Lycia from a wicked tyrant, and the weapon he wields is the legendary Sword of Seals. It burns with the intensity of a true hero, and offers Roy incredible power.

:4pit: Woah, that's hardcore! I wish my bow was on fire...maybe then I wouldn't get teased so much for it.

:4palutena: Oh, nonsense, Pit. The bow is a noble weapon befitting any up-and-coming heavenly champion!

:4pit: Are you just saying that 'cos it's named after you?

:4palutena: Maybe. Anyway, that's not important. What is important is not getting hit by that sword! Those flames will put the hurt on you like nothing else, and the weapon itself is pretty dangerous, too. Roy's power is concentrated at the base of his blade, so try to keep your distance from him. Oh, and watch out for his Flare Blade attack: one hit from that will launch you into next week!

:4pit: Sheesh, this guy sounds pretty intense. Where can I get a sword like that?

:4palutena: From any good divine weapons specialist, of course!

:4pit: Oh, so you think if I asked Dyntos nicely, he would--?

:4palutena: I was being ironic, Pit.

:4pit: Oh. Right.

:4pit: Lady Palutena, this lady's giving me a weird vibe. Who is she?

:4palutena: That's Tiki, servant of the Divine Dragon, Naga. She was once the princess of the Divine Dragon tribe, and she was a vital ally of the Hero-King Marth way back when. Centuries later, she's still going strong, and she's even crossed passed with the Hero-King's descendants along the way!

:4pit: Oh, neat. Wait...centuries?!

:4palutena: That's right! As a Divine Dragon, Tiki is immortal, and it's her job to discern the word of Naga and impart it unto the mortal world.

:4pit: Whoah, we're getting into "unto" territory. So she serves a goddess too, huh?

:4palutena: Precisely. Tiki is the avatar and mouthpiece of Naga, hence her title, "Voice of Naga". Owing to her Manakete heritage, she can use the mystical Dragonstone to unleash her true power as a Divine Dragon. In this form, she can breathe holy flames blessed by Naga herself, and she's even got powerful claws that'll do some serious damage. She may look dainty, but she's no pushover!

:4pit: Huh, and I thought priests were supposed to be peaceful. She must've been asleep for a long time, though - I'll bet she's almost as old as you, Lady Palutena!

:4palutena: ...

:4pit: That...that was a joke! Ha ha! It's okay to laugh! Uh...Lady Palutena?

:4palutena: Y'know what, Pit? Since you're so smart, maybe you should figure this one out for yourself.

:4pit: Wait, what?! N-no! I was just kidding! Lady Palutena?!

:4palutena: Sorry, Pit, can't hear you! Dear me, I must be going deaf in my old age!

:4pit: I'M SORRY I'M SORRY I'M SORRY I'M SORRY! LADY PALUTEEEENAAAA!

:4pit: Hey, Lady Palutena, I think this little blob thing is lost. Is it somebody's pet?

:4palutena: That's no pet, Pit. That's Bandana Dee!

:4pit: Gesundheit.

:4palutena: No, I mean, his name is Bandana Dee. He's one of King Dedede's most trusted vassals and the leader of the Waddle Dee army. Unlike most of his pals, he's pretty easy-going, and is actually good friends with Kirby. You can distinguish him from his fellow footsoldiers by the blue bandana and trusty spear he carries.

:4pit: Oh, okay. So he's like the captain of the guard or something?

:4palutena: In a manner of speaking.

:4pit: Sweet! He's just like me! Hey, I wonder if he'll let me pet him?

:4palutena: I, uh, wouldn't do that if I were you. Despite his cuddly appearance, Bandana Dee is a fearsome fighter: he's a master of spear-based combat, and he'll gladly put his life on the line to defend his beloved king!

:4pit: No way, Lady Palutena! He's not a warrior, he's just a cute widdle - OW! HE POKED ME IN THE EYE!

:4palutena: I did warn you...

:4pit: OW, OW, OW, OW! LADY PALUTENA, I CAN'T SEE!

:4palutena: I wonder if Dedede would be willing to trade captains?

:4pit: Lady Palutena, this guy sure looks like he's ready for a battle!

:4palutena: That's Henry Fleming, Pit. And you'd better believe he's ready for a battle! He's the leader of the elite task force known as Unit S.T.E.A.M. - Strike Team Eliminating the Alien Menace! He's personally drafted by Abraham Lincoln, President of the United States of American, to help in the struggle against the alien invaders that threaten Earth.

:4pit: United States of What-now? Earth?

:4palutena: Oh, it's in another world, Pit. Don't worry about the little details, just focus on the battle at hand!

:4pit: Alrighty then! So what's up with that gun of his?

:4palutena: I'm glad you asked! Fleming's gun, as with all of his technology, is powered by steam. The more steam Fleming has at his disposal, the more powerful his attacks! His weapons will gather steam over time, so don't let him get too comfortable, or he'll be blowing you away in no time at all! Watch out for his Eagle Strike especially: it's a powerful and patriotic blast that'll send you halfway to the moon before you can say "apple pie"!

:4pit: Okay, good to know! I gotta say, Unit S.T.EA.M. sounds like a pretty cool name for a team. Why can't we have a snazzy title like that?

:4palutena: What's wrong with Palutena's Army?

:4pit: Nothing, nothing at all! But it's kinda...bland, y'know?

:4palutena: Alright. What would you suggest?

:4pit: How about Team D.I.V.I.N.E. - Dealing Ice-cold Vengeance to the Insolent Netherworld Enemies!

:4palutena: Not bad, but it's bit of a mouthful, isn't it?

:4pit: Okay, okay. How about if we became a team of stylish super-spies? We could wear high heels and strike cool poses and everything! We'll be called Pit's Angels!

:4palutena: If it's all the same to you, Pit, I think I'll handle the nomenclature.

:4pit: Wait, hold on! I'm just getting started!

:4palutena: That's what I was afraid of.

Pit: Wait, is this some kind of dragon?
Palutena: That's actually Ridley, leader of a criminal organization known as the Space Pirates.
Pit: But we already fought Space Pirates, and this guy wasn't there...
Ridley: Because those Space Pirates were not the ones I command, you imbecile.
Pit: Hey! I'm not an imbecile....right, Lady Palutena?
Palutena: Welll....
Pit: That doesn't bode well.
Ridley: Anyways, I look forward to ripping you into pieces on the battlefield, whelp. It'll at least entertain me.
Pit: "Ripping me to pieces"?! Can I get someone else to fight?!

Pit: Whoah, who's the supersized crocodile brandishing a cape?
Palutena: Pit, honestly; do you not know who this is?
Pit: Wait, wasn't he in that Mario baseball game on the Wii?
Viridi: King K.Rool is the Bowser to Donkey Kong's Mario, really. He's out to steal DK's food so he can make the Kongs starve todeath, defying the natural order!
Palutena: Doesn't seem like the most friendly of characters, really.
Pit: Wait, did he just pull out a blunderbuss?!
Palutena
: Good luck, Pit!

:4pit:Ohh, is this Mewtwo?
:4palutena:Yes, it is! How did you know?
:4pit:Some of the veterans here talked about how they hoped he would help when that whole Subspace War was going on since most of them fought him before? Guess he was busy or somethin though.
:4palutena:Oh, interesting. Well yeah, Mewtwo has recently discovered his full potential with his Mega Evolution: Mega Mewtwo Y!
:4pit:Mega Mewtwo...Y?
:4palutena:Because he gets even stronger!
:4pit:No I mean... well anyway, how did he learn how to do that?
:4palutena:It's kind of a mystery. But I know a bit about his origin! Scientists tried cloning the famous Pokemon, Mew, but kinda messed up and made Mewtwo! He turned out to be a lot angrier and chaotic than they hoped.
:4pit:Oh, he's just like Pittoo!
:4palutena:Hey, yeah, I guess so, that's one way to think of it!
:4pit:So I'm Pittoo's Mew!
:4palutena:...Sure! Anyway, watch out, Mewtwo is the strongest Pokemon! He can temporarily break your mind with just a stare! He can toss you around with telekinesis! He can be almost anywhere with teleportation! He can even predict your next move with his telepathy!
:4pit:...aren't...we communicating through telepathy...?
:4mewtwo:...

:4pit:Lady Palutena! That bear is holding a bird hostage in his backpack!
:4palutena:That bird isn't captive, Pit, that's Banjo and Kazooie. They've worked together many times to stop the evil witch Gruntilda from accomplishing her evil plots. They were big platforming icons of their time, their many fans really worked to get them here.
:4pit:They were really that popular? I guess people really like heroes that take down old hags!
Listen here you little twit, say that again and I'll toss you down a pit!
:4pit:Gah! It's some kind of goblin!
:4palutena:You fiend! How did you hack into my divine frequency?
Your divine frequency? Please! I found my way here with ease.
:4pit:I'm still in the middle of a fight here!
Listen well, I'll help you out, but only so you can thrash that pair about! The bird can fly and fire eggs, and run quick with her chicken legs. Don't forget the hairy dope, he'll whack you good and then you'll mope!
:4pit:Uh, thanks, I think?
:4palutena:Well that was certainly... helpful of you.
Now off I go, so don't delay, win this match and make my day!

:4pit:Something's up with that girl. Is she associated with the Underworld?
:4palutena:That's Shantae.
:4pit:Shantae? That sounds un...trustworthy.
:4palutena:Not really - she's the fearsome Half-Genie Hero. Shantae's ponytail serves as a whip-sword all by itself.
:4pit:Doubt it.
:4palutena:And that's not all. By dancing, she can transform into various creatures: a monkey, an elephant, a harpy, or some sort of mermaid.
:4pit:Greeeeeat. So it's like Thanatos, but more annoying. Then she's some Underworld girl.
:4palutena:Don't worry, she--
:substitute:(Actually Shantae masquerading as Pseudo-Palutena) HEY!
:4pit:Meep! L-Lady--
:substitute:Ah-HEM. What makes you think of your precious Underworld when you see someone like me?!
:4pit:I dunno. The hair a-and that outfit and...and the fact that you just cut off my telepathic communications!
:substitute:Hah, I'll give you that last one. Actually, I was born on Earth...or maybe something called the Genie Realm. Genie mom, human dad. Got it?!
:4pit:Okay, you're creeping me out, too?! That's it! I'll show you the power of the light, whether you like it or not!
:substitute:Have at ya, bub! Even without magic, YOU'LL BE FEELING THIS ONE IN THE MORNING!
:4palutena:How in the... (Beat) Pit?! Are you there?!

Pit: Is he doing okay?
Palutena: That's Elvin Gadd, E.Gadd for short.
Pit: He looks like he's had too much coffee.
Palutena: Be careful, Pit, if he sucks you in with his Poltergust, he can spit you into a dangerous combo. But son't worry too much. He's wide open when he uses it, so all you have to do is attack him from behind when he tries to suck you in.
Pit: You sure I can't try to distract him with cofee or something? He really looks like he runs a coffee shop on the side.

Pit : Uhhh.. Lady Palutena, who is this strange bull guy and that evil magic he has? Is he a Underworld solider?

Palutena : Nope, he is a F-Zero racer just like Captain Falcon. His machine is the Black Bull and it's number is #30. His high experience with that and black magic allows him to carry out his grudge against Falcon.

Pit : Really though, those attacks REALLY hurt!

Palutena : That is due to his great strength, unrivaled by many in his world. Even there he is the Emperor of Evil, and he's got just the right amount to crush the world.

Pit : Oh man!

Palutena : So you must give it your all to stop him. Many of his attacks hit greater than many of the fighters here, but as a result he leaves himself VERY wide open alot. Careful and quick strikes with your blades will lead you to victory! Especially firing projectiles to keep your distance.

Pit: Hey! There are two of them. Isn't that cheating?
Palutena: Those are the Ice Climbers. They never split up willingly.
Pit: It's so hard to focus on them both...
Palutena: They are truely a daunting foe.
Viridi: Don't you two get it yet?
Pit: What are you doing here?
Palutena: What don't we get?
Viridi: They are the toughest opponents you will ever face when they are together. However, if you can force them apart they become easy to handle.
Hades: Aaw. Are you having trouble with little two toddlers with hammers? It's so hard to feel pity for Pitty when he is so weak.
Pit: You too? Wow. Today's just not my day.
Palutena: Honestly. You don't ever give us a break do you.
Hades: I would if there was a war to be fought, but my forces are taking a holiday with you out of the picture, so I thought I'd take one too. Besides: I could be of use to you for once. Or I could be saying that just to double-cross you. Now forever after I give you this information you will be in doubt as to whether I am helping you beat this duo.
Palutena: What was the real reason you came here?
Hades: Just to torment you. Cheerio!
Palutena: What's up with him?
Viridi: Just use my advice and stop wasting time...

:4pit:Who's this Lady Palutena?
:4palutena:That's Lana, a Hyrulian Warrior also known as 'The White Sorceress'.
:4pit:So she's a magic user then? That means her weakness must be when I bring the fight up close and personal!
:4palutena:I wouldn't be so sure Pit, other then her tome she also has a deku spear for melee combat.
:4pit:That things a spear? It looks more like a big twig to me.
:4palutena:Don't let it's weak appearance fool you it was a gift from the Great Deku Tree and allows Lana to also wield water magic while her tome allows her to use some kind of barrier magic.
:4pit:Not as harmless as I thought then...Looks like this is gonna be a tough battle. I hope there's some heart pieces around
:4palutena:Or perhaps you'd rather find floor ice cream instead.

:4pit:: Havent seen him in Forever .Probably late for the party Because He/She lost Charizard

:4palutena::Actually its because He doesnt Rely on pokemon anymore . Now he uses items like Rods and Bikes
:4pit:: I dont know if thats the strongest weapon choise
Viridi: Its about time , I think he tired Poor Ivysaur and squirtle out
:4palutena:: Don't underestimate him. He can use a special flute to summon a ledgendary pokemon
:4pit::Cant be worse than Hades

Pit: "Hey, check this guy out! Love the vintage look!"
Palutena: "That's Takamaru, hero of the Edo period. He's a brave young samurai that was tasked with raiding the strongholds of fellow Edo lords manipulated by an extraterrestrial force that made its residence in the Mysterious Murasame Castle."
Pit: "That sounds familiar."
Viridi: "Say what you will about his feats, but isn't he just another ordinary swordsman? Personally, I think we should kick them all out, exception going to that dreamboat Link."
Palutena: "Coincidentally, the two characters have a bit in common with their shared birth year of 1986."
Pit: "Hey, isn't that my birth year?"
Viridi: "From what I've heard, it's also Samus' as well."
Pit: "Oh sweet, we're quadruplets!"
Palutena: "Anyway... Takamaru is very proficient with the ways of iaido sword play. He also has talent with gifts he acquired from friendly raccoon dogs including a cloak that renders him invisible, will-o-wisp fireballs and gigantic lightning strikes. Be very careful when engaging him."
Viridi: "Wait, he's that proficient with both fire and lightning and a friend of nature too? I wonder if Phosphora would mind having a new co-captain..."

Pit: "Hey, check this guy out! Love the vintage look!"
Palutena: "That's Takamaru, hero of the Edo period. He's a brave young samurai that was tasked with raiding the strongholds of fellow Edo lords manipulated by an extraterrestrial force that made its residence in the Mysterious Murasame Castle."
Viridi: "I like to believe that I'm good with my knowledge on the fighters here, but I am drawing a complete blank on this one."
Palutena: "Understandable -- Takamaru has played it low key ever since defeating the menace that threatened his lands. Only the people in that region knew about his legacy. Doesn't help that his last active role was thirty years ago."
Pit & Viridi: "THIRTY YEARS?!"
Palutena: "Yeah, seems like he's been looking for a new spotlight to stand under recently."
Pit: "I can relate. So Lady Palutena, what's the plan?"
Palutena: "Takamaru is very proficient with the ways of iaido sword play and can also fight at range with pinwheel blades, will-o-wisps and lightning blasts."
Pit: "...it's like fighting Pyrron, Phosphora and Magus all at once then... Great."

Pit: "Lady Palutena, there's a guy down here with a yo-yo and phenomenal psychic ability giving me the business. Says he's from Americola. Sounds tasty."
Palutena: "...Ness?"
Pit: "...iiiiif Ness were 5' 10" and built like an athlete maybe."
Viridi: "If we're going to do this song and dance every time you're unfamiliar with someone, how do you ever expect to do well in these fights?"
Palutena: "This is really odd, are you sure there's someone else down there with you? There's nothing coming up here."
Pit: "Hey guys, I'm seriously at a loss here, could you--
*static gets more intense as you hear Pit, Palutena and Viridi squabble with one another fading into white noise*
*static interruption gets louder as barely discernable voice is heard*
???: "Adjusting telepathic frequency, given current cosmic interference, a sync rate of 727GHz should be fine..."
???: "Ah here we go, Mike? Miiiiiiike! Michael Jones, pick up~!"
Mike: "Mica? What's up? Been a while since I've heard your voice!"
Mica: "Not much, just thought I would let you know that there are some weirdos trying to pick your head for details in this area. Stay sharp!"
Mike: "No worries, I've still got the Island Star to sort things out with and I know Chief Coralcola and the rest of them are still beckoning the Southern Cross for my continued well being. If all else fails, I made sure to pack all the throwing weapons I could from the last visit to Coralcola. Uncle Jones thought I should carry the Oxford Wonder World with me, but I don't know if I want to be flung through time again... Or worse."
Mica: "I'm glad you're in such high spirits Mike, but do take care. The family and I will be spectating from Neo Argonia. Make sure you do your best!"
Mike: "Awesome. Tell everyone I said hi!"
*sounds like a radio station tuning rapidly play out*
*you can barely make out the commentary of Pit, Palutena and Viridi coming to a climax as a frustrated Pit desperately yells something to the effect of "HOW CAN HUMANS BLOCK TELEPATHIC CHANNELS?"*
Palutena *fully audible*: ---I heard putting bananas in your ears could work..."

Pit: "Lady Palutena, there's a guy down here with a yo-yo and phenomenal psychic ability giving me the business. Says he's from Americola. Sounds tasty."
Palutena: "That's Mike Jones."
Viridi: "...WHO?"
Palutena: "He's a regular teen with some irregular circumstances. His Uncle, Dr. Jones, is a well regarded archaeologist who spent some time in the tropics researching some strange phenomena, most of which were not so pleasant. After Dr. Jones was kidnapped by extraterrestrial forces interested in his research, Mike arrived on the scene and using clues left through multiple islands and their cavernous ruins, he tracked down his Uncle, stormed the alien spaceship and defeated Zoda, the leader of these forces before he could continue his pillaging of planets."
Pit: "Whoa, this guy's awesome. I don't know how he did it without the power of flight. Or any miracle really."
Palutena: "And to think that was his summer vacation... Shortly after that, the poor guy found himself hurled through time and once again had to rely on his own developing abilities and quick thinking to chase echoes of Zoda through different periods of history."
Viridi: "This kid's luck is the worst."
Palutena: "I wouldn't say that, he did make some pretty notable friends on that field trip through history."
Pit: "I wonder if he's knows anything about that statue of Cleopatra enjoying a pepperoni slice..."
Palutena: "He seemingly also has a bit of an admirer in the first princess of Argonia, one of the survivors of Zoda's planetary onslaughts who he rescued. She's a cutie."
Pit: "...aaaaaand now I don't feel so bad for him anymore. So how do I go about beating him?"
Palutena: "Mike is an varsity level ace at pitching so his use of the Island Star flail is second to none. Beyond this, he has a pretty crazy repertoire of projectiles that could make it a hassle to get in on. Reflect them if he gets too predictable."
Viridi: "That's a lot of work. Why don't you just drown him?"
Pit & Palutena: "..."
Viridi: "WHAT? I just found out he can't swim. How lame is that? You travel the world with your uncle on these expeditions and you never learned how to swim? Pfft haha!"

  • Pit: Lady Palutena, did Fox change his looks or something?
  • Palutena: Actually Pit, that is Wolf O'Donnell.
  • Viridi: He's the leader of a rag-tag mercenary team, known as Star Wolf.
  • Leon: And you better respect him too.
  • Pit: Wha, who are you?!
  • Leon: I'm one of lord Wolf's top mercenaries, Leon Powalski. And you better watch out, or he'll shred you to pieces. *laughs evilly*
  • Viridi: Who invited this quack?!
  • Leon: Watch your tongue, puny girl!!
  • Viridi: What did you just call me lizard?!
  • Palutena: Anyway, Wolf is an aggressive fighter who relies more on his quick reflexes than raw power. He's also on the heavier side, despite of his feral posture.
  • Pit: Okay, that's good to know.
  • Palutena: His Blaster is also unique in that the claw that's attached to it can damage you if you're too close to it.
  • Viridi: Wolf also has a Reflector, so your arrows won't do you any good against him.
  • Leon: In other words, you'll have to fight head-on, not that it will do you any good against lord Wolf.
  • Viridi: You must really idolize Wolf if you're so confident of his victory.
  • Pit: Hey, no matter the challenge, I'm ready.
  • Palutena: That's the spirit Pit, and good luck.
  • Leon: Yeah, good luck, because you'll be looking for a hospital once lord Wolf is done with you!
  • Viridi: Ugh! We get it already, so get out of here now!!
  • Leon: Fine, but you've been warned. *laughs evilly*

"Don't underestimate him, Pit."
"Huh?"
"Just because Spyro is smaller than most dragons doesn't mean he'll be easy to take down."
"I wasn't thinking that!"
"You were definitely thinking that."
"Why would you think that?"
"First of all: Telepathy. Secondly, you were clearly winding up to kick him like a football.
"I wouldn't recommend you do that, Pit. Unless you want to get burned, electrocuted, frozen and buried. In that order."
"No, I'm pretty sure I do not want that."
"In that case, pay attention to the element Spyro is using. That element will dictate how some of his more dynamic attacks are executed, allowing you to counter his strengths and exploit his weaknesses."
"Gee, can't I just stick with the usual game plan? You know, hacky-slashy pointy-shooty. I mean, it worked on the big guys..."
"Sometimes I wonder if you only call for my help because you like the stimulating conversation."
"That's just the icing on the partnership cake, Lady Palutena!"

Pit: Aww! Look at that wolf.
Palutena: Watch out Pit! That's Wolf Link.
Pit: That's Link?!? Viridi what did you do?!?
Viridi: I didn't do anything. That's what happens to Link when he enters the realm of Twilight. At least he's not a bunny rabbit or something.
Palutena: Link also has aid from Midna, the Twili on his back. She can guide Link's jumps, and use Dark Magic to help him defeat multiple opponents at once.
Pit: She helps him recover? Isn't that a little overpowered?
Palutena: Would you prefer I didn't give you the Power of Flight?
Pit: No no! I'm fine with outside help.

Pit: Is that... a tailor?

Palutena: That's the Savvy Stylist. She's a world famous fashion designer.

Pit: She seems pretty fashionable herself.

Viridi: What would you know about fashion, Pit?

Pit: (distressed) W-what?!

Viridi: I mean, come on! Who wears togas anymore?!

Pit: Can you tell about how she fights instead of making fun of me?

Palutena: Well, for starters, she fights with nothing but her innate sense of fashion. She can order in a clothes rack to sweep you
away. She can even crush you with a giant shoe!

Pit: A giant shoe?! Maybe instead of fighting, I can borrow some clothes for a bit.

Viridi: Goodness knows you'll need the advice.

Pit: Better than wearing leaves all day...

Pit: I wonder who this princess is.

Viridi: That's Princess Daisy of Sarasaland. You know, I kinda like her. She's carefree, really into gardening, and she doesn't get kidnapped, unlike certain princesses. Not a bad résumé for a human! Might even spare her...

Palutena: Not to mention she's a really good athlete.

Pit: Okay, so how do I--

Viridi: I mean, look at her! One of her moves is literally growing a flower bed! Now that's dedication!

Pit: More like obsession...

Viridi: Hey Pit, after this, see if you can convince Daisy to join the Forces of Nature!

:4pit:: Hey... is it a good idea for such a little guy to carry a spear that big?
:4palutena:: That's Bandana Dee, an underdog hero for Dreamland. Don't let his small size fool you.
:4pit:: I can't help but think that it has to be hard to use it.....
:4palutena:: He'll keep you at range with his wide arsenal of skills with that spear, even fly with it!
:4pit:: Oh COME ON! Even the underdog heroes get to fly on their own?!
:4palutena:: Well just try to use that light weight of his to help kick-start that flight!

:4pit:: Does something smell fishy here?
:4palutena:: More like Kalamari, that's a creature called an "Inkling" whose life is full of a territorial war... a flat out Inkvasion!
:4pit:: Jeez... looks like they've got a variety splatter of weapons!
:4palutena:: Their squid form swims faster in the ink trails they shoot. They'll try to sneak behind you and let it riptide!
:4pit:: Well we'll just have to sea who can win it out!
:4palutena:: Remember that even Ink can be repelled like any other projectile and don't squid around!

:4pit:: Is it just me.... or is there something chilling about this guy?
Viridi: I-I-It's him! The one and only King of Darkness, Ganon!
Hades: Really? I have to fight over the title to this undercooked bacon meal? Puh-lease!
Viridi: What he lacks in the arrogance of SOME people, he makes up for with a massive magical arsenal, and that trident isn't something to overlook either!
Hades: With such stubby pig's feet, he needs range like that to try to damage anyone.
:4pit:: That's... all the help you can give?!

:4pit:: Is it just me or does this guy seem a little Krazy?
:4palutena:: That's K. Rool.. specifically as a King. He changes titles more than you dip in hotsprings.
:4pit:: When you're THAT big I don't think anyone's gonna stop you from doing that...
:4palutena:: He's got a big arsenal to match from all his fights against Donkey Kong as his crew, but he isn't going to get around fast weighed down by all that equipment.
:4pit:: Yeah! Wait... then why doesn't that stop me? Or Link?
:4palutena:: Simple, heroes always have a blessing of a Goddess to hold an infinite amount of tools without worrying about weight. Luckily for us there's NOTHING heroic about this Kroc!

Pit: Who's this guy, Lady Palutena?

Palutena: That's Professor Herschel Layton. He's a professor of archaeology at Gressenheller University, in London, England.

Pit: A college professor? What's he going to do, bore me to death by talking about fossils?

Viridi: That's the kind of talk that'll end up with you getting schooled.

Viridi: Layton is a true gentleman, and he's adventured across the world solving mysteries. If he hears you disrespecting him, he'll probably give you a puzzle for homework!

Pit: ...Puzzles don't sound very dangerous, Viridi.

Palutena: This puzzle might be. The Professor is a skilled fencer and surprisingly agile, so it's a mystery as to how you'll land a hit.

Pit: Wow. Thanks for the encouragement, Lady Palutena.

Palutena: Or how you'll manage to avoid getting pummelled by his Slot Machine Gun.

Pit: Machine gun?!? What am I supposed to do about that?!?

Palutena: Critical thinking is the key to success, Pit.

Pit: Wait... I can reflect the shots from the machine gun using my Guardian Orbitars, right?

Palutena: Puzzle solved!

Pit: Haha! Yes! Maybe if I show the Professor my puzzle-solving skills, he might take me on as an apprentice instead of fighting me!

Viridi: I think that position is already filled. Maybe he'll be polite and finish you off a little quicker.

Pit: What's that kid doing here?

Palutena: That's no kid, it's a squid! The Inklings are a species of genetically mutated squid that can switch between squid and humanoid form at will.

Pit: Genetic mutation? What's Viridi up to now?

Viridi: Hey, don't look at me, Pit! I'm pretty sure this was because of some meddling humans. I mean, look at how they dress-- it's almost as if they want to pretend be human teenagers!

Pit: A sea creature pretending to be a perfectly ordinary human? That's ridiculous!

Palutena: ...Anyway. The Inklings use colourful inks to attack, and can swim in it when in squid form, though they cannot attack as a squid.

Pit: Ugh... Do you know how hard this stuff is going to be to get off my wings?

Palutena: Consider it motivation to not get hit!

Pit: Um... Am I fighting... A fish?

Palutena: Oh, it's a Magikarp! This Pokemon is one of the most common in the universe, and is infamous for being pitifully weak.

Pit: So what's it doing here then? It kinda looks like it's having trouble breathing.

Palutena: I'd say that battling here is a good way to gain experience. It eventually will evolve into a large dragon-like monster called Gyarados.

Viridi: Hm, a pathetic creature that just might have a tiny bit of potential. Kinda reminds me of someone.

Pit: What do you mean, Viridi?

Viridi: Oh, nothing... You do sometimes appear to flail around like a fish out of water, after all.

Palutena: Which reminds me. Magikarp's Flail is a unique move which gets more powerful the more damage Magikarp has taken. It's best to keep your distance from a battered Magikarp.

Pit: Mm... Battered fish...

Palutena: Pit, focus!

Pit: Uh, looks like Mario's diet was a little too extreme. We need to get this guy some pizza fast!

Palutena: Don't worry, Pit! This is Paper Mario. He's supposed to be this thin.

Pit: Paper Mario? So this'll be an easy fight, right? If I flap my wings, he might blow away!

Palutena: Interdimensional travel can sometimes affect your weight. Paper Mario is really about as heavy as Kirby.

Pit: Uh... You don't think I gained any interdimensional weight, do you?

Palutena: Well, a few years ago you found flying a lot easier, so it might have happened. Don't worry, you might be paper thin after getting whacked by Paper Mario's hammer a few times!

Pit: You know what, I think I'm fine with the extra weight. It's all muscle, right?

Palutena: ...Sure! Anyway, Paper Mario has partners he can call into battle, as well as strange creatures known as Pixls. The Barry Pixl can be used to reflect projectiles, so be careful where you shoot.

:4pit:Pit: Uhhh.....Samus looks a little off. Kinda creepy even...

:4palutena:Palutena: Be careful Pit! That's not Samus, it's Dark Samus!

:4pit:Pit: Dark Samus? So, she's like a Pittoo for Samus?

:4palutena:Palutena: Not really. Dark Samus, though she looks similar, is very different from Samus. She's an alien metroid that absorbed Samus's Phazon Suit and even some of her DNA. She's dangerous and VERY powerful.

Viridi: Watch out for her Phazon attacks, Pit!!

:4pit:Pit: Uhh...What's Phazon?

Viridi: It's a radioactive substance that gives her power. But if you become afflicted by it you will be corrupted. You will be a lot more vulnerable to her attacks if that happens.

:4pit:Pit: Corrupted? I don't like the sound of that.

:4palutena:Palutena: Pit, I suggest that if you do get corrupted try to use that to your advantage as your attacks will get stronger, as well. Phazon causes mutations that both hinder you and help you! You'll have to be careful but strike hard at the right opportunity!

:4pit:Pit: Did you say mutations!!!? I'm not gonna sprout an extra head, am I!!? I really don't think I like this at all...

Viridi: Don't worry Pit, the effects of Phazon isn't permanent. That is, unless you've taken too much damage, in which case it is permanent.

:4pit:Pit: That didn't help! I still don't like it!

Pit: Who's that chick carrying all that stuff?

Palutena: That's an Anna, Pit. She's a travelling saleswoman, and is pretty good at her job.

Pit: Wait a second, that's AN Anna?

Palutena: Yep! There are loads of Annas traveling around the world, working all sorts of jobs. I heard some work in some pretty high places.

Pit: That's neat. I wonder what it'd be like if there were a whole bunch of mes? We'd be unstoppable!

Palutena: That'd be nice, but let's get back to the Anna you're fighting. She carries a wide arrangement of weapons she's collected over the years and isn't afraid to dirty some of her merchandise.

Pit: Sounds like she's really diversified.

Palutena: Yes, but there's one really important thing to look out for. If Anna gets the Smash ball, you'll- *call cuts*

Pit: I'll what? Lady Palutena? Are you still there?

Anna: Sorry, your line's been disconnected. To continue your call, please pay 30,000 hearts.

Pit: What?! I don't have that many hearts on me!

Anna: looks like you'll have to find out yourself what happens when my sister gets the Smash Ball.

Palutena: We all know this guy has no need for an introduction

Pit: Who'd think I'd be fighting THE Ryu!

Palutena: Pit, be careful. Ryu didn't become a world famous fighter with just his fireball, Dragon Punch, and Hurricane Kick. He's acquired a large number of martial art skills over the years, and hectic battles like this aren't new to him.

Pit: You'd think a career in martial arts would be kinda normal and not fighting monsters and comic book heroes with his bare hands.

Palutena: He has his strong will and never ending training to thank for that. He's picked up a real punch most people in his profession wouldn't have just by fighting normal people. Some of his attacks look a bit too brutal for someone like him.

Pit: I wonder why.

Palutena: Let's find that answer on the battlefield!

Pit: All right!
 
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Quillion

Smash Hero
Joined
Sep 17, 2014
Messages
5,674
Snake Codecs:

Snake: Otacon, what do Pac Pellets taste like? Is it true they taste like cookies?

Otacon: What? How can you think of food when you’re in such serious trouble? You’re fighting Pac-Man, Snake!

Snake: So? All he does is run away from ghosts and eat pellets.

Otacon: That’s exactly the point, Snake! Years of escaping from ghosts whilst trapped in a maze has made him a master of evasion and turning the tables! He’s lead whole armies of ghosts around a corner just to lead them into a trap that devours them in seconds!

Otacon: He’s got other tricks, too! Butt bounces, pac dot shots, rev rolls, Fire Hydrant Sentries the list goes on!

Snake: Yeah, but he can’t harm me if he doesn’t get a power pellet, right?

Otacon: Not quite, Snake. Pac-Man may need power pellets to deal with ghosts, but he’s more than capable of unleashing his fists on a physical opponent… or his mouth, if he’s hungry.

Snake: What?!? Urgh, no wonder he’s wearing such a predatory smile. He was waiting for me to make a mistake all this time!

Snake: So, Otacon, how do I beat Pac-Man?

Otacon: You can’t.

Snake: WHAT?!?

Otagon: The game was intended to go on indefinitely, but a glitch in the programming means level 256 is unbeatable, so…

Snake: That’s not what I- You know what? Never mind. I’ll just try painting my grenades yellow, maybe that will fool him.


Snake: Miller, mind telling me what a winged woman is doing here?
Hades: Who is this Miller you are speaking about, and you are not fighting a mere mortal human, you are fighting a goddess of light.
Snake: Again? How are people getting this frequency? Who are you?
Hades: Someone who wants Paluey to be beaten, although since she is a goddess, and she can reflect or counter you, you won't really win.
Snake: You would be surprised at what I done....
Hades: Oh right, name is Hades, you are fighting Palutena, careful of her auto-lasers, it will be shocking to you.
Snake: Aren't you supposed to help me by telling me ideas on how to fight her, instead of messing with me?
Hades: Please, a so called soldier who destroyed Metal Gears, beaten FOXHOUND vs a goddess, course I know who will win, but its more fun to see you fail.
  • If Snake gets KOed by Palutena while on the codec:
Hades: (sarcastic)Wow, you sure did well against her. Do make sure you try to beat her next time.


-beep beep-
-SWOOSH!-

Snake : Otacon, who's this strange guy in a bull costume?

Otacon : That's Black Shadow, F-ZERO Pilot #30. He is Captain Falcon's greatest rival!

Snake : I see. Wonder how that stuff turns out on the racetrack.

Otacon : His machine the Black Bull is specially designed for some serious damage to others. It even has the highest top speed of them all, like a charging bull!

Snake : Woah, what about outside the cockpit though? What should i look out for?

Otacon : Just look out for his moves altogether. He has great power mixed with a fair share of very dark magic as his specialties.

Snake : Got it.

- Exit swoosh -


Snake: Mei Ling, there's a kid in a costume with a working laser
Mei Ling: That's Mega Man, he may look like a cute child but he's actually a super fighting robot.
Mei Ling: Not only does he have his own Mega Buster but he also uses the weaponry of his defeated foes. Kind of like you Snake.
Snake: But why does a he look like a child. To get my guard down?
Mei Ling: He was a built as a surrogate son by the brilliant inventor Dr Light but when Dr Willy's forces threatened the world, Rock volenteered to become Mega Man and fight the evil robot masters.
Snake: Another child soldier...
Mei Ling: You always find a way to put a downer on things.


Snake: Huh, whose this kid

Mei Ling: Looks like an Inkling, a young yet threatening opponent, they use Ink as a source of damage and can even transform into a squid!

Snake: A squid? Strange... What should I look out for?

Mei Ling: Usual stuff Snake, try and avoid and hit when you can, theyre ink can be surprisingly dangerous so keep on your toes

Snake: Hmm, can Ink really splat on the battlefield?

Mei Ling: Well they can answer that question for you, over and out Snake.


Snake: Mei Ling! There is a cute little girl with purple hair!
Mei Ling: She is Shantae, the Half-Genie Hero.
Snake: Shantae...the name is charming, but I've never heard of her.
Mei Ling: Well, I don't know a lot of her either! But what I know is more than enough for fear her! She has several powers as a genie. She can tu, and even using some special gears!
Snake: Uh, it's nothing new from what I've already challan...WHAT SHE JUST TRANSFORMED INTO AN ELEPHANT!!


Snake: Colonel, what is this big fat crocodile?
Colonel: That's King K. Rool, the head of the Kremling, a group of crocodile that wants to stole Donkey Kong's bananas!
Snake: What!? Create almost a war with the Kongs just for some bananas? Why?
Colonel: Because he likes bananas.
Snake:...Leaders becames more stranger as the time goes on...
 
Last edited:

Guybrush20X6

Creator of Lego Theory
Joined
May 22, 2012
Messages
15,882
NNID
Guybrush20X6
3DS FC
4253-3477-4804
Switch FC
SW-2140-7758-3904
I'll do a couple

Krystal

Pit: Lady Palutena, I thought you were the one with the staff around here, who's that?
Palutena: That's Krystal, a member of the Star Fox team.
Pit: Wait, if she's a fox then why is she blue?
Viridi: Ughh, so unnatural. Dyeing your fur is so bad for the enviroment.
Palutena: Anyway, unlike her teammates Krystal uses an ancient Magical staff to fight. It gives her wide range but it's sometime slow to swing around. Time your attacks carefully.

Shovel Knight

Pit: Those horns... This guy reminds me of Gaol.
Palutena: You needn't worry, Shovel Knight is a champion of Justice and Shovel-ry.
Pit: Shovel Knight? That's a bit on the nose.
Palutena: It may look like a simple spade but he can use his weapon to create pit traps and bounce of his foes heads.
Pit: That's like calling MArio "jumping plumber" or Kirby "eating blob".
Viridi: We get the point, "Kid Icarus"
Pit: Huh?
 

Wintropy

Peace and love and all that jazzmatazz~! <3
Joined
Aug 28, 2014
Messages
10,032
Location
Here, there, who knows?
NNID
Winterwhite
3DS FC
1461-6253-6301
I write a lot of these for the lulz. Here are my most recent ones~

:4pit: Whoah, Lady Palutena! Check this guy out! His sword's on fire! ON FIRE!

:4palutena: That seems to be the case. And no wonder: that's Roy, the Prince of Pherae. He fought to save his homeland of Lycia from a wicked tyrant, and the weapon he wields is the legendary Sword of Seals. It burns with the intensity of a true hero, and offers Roy incredible power.

:4pit: Woah, that's hardcore! I wish my bow was on fire...maybe then I wouldn't get teased so much for it.

:4palutena: Oh, nonsense, Pit. The bow is a noble weapon befitting any up-and-coming heavenly champion!

:4pit: Are you just saying that 'cos it's named after you?

:4palutena: Maybe. Anyway, that's not important. What is important is not getting hit by that sword! Those flames will put the hurt on you like nothing else, and the weapon itself is pretty dangerous, too. Roy's power is concentrated at the base of his blade, so try to keep your distance from him. Oh, and watch out for his Flare Blade attack: one hit from that will launch you into next week!

:4pit: Sheesh, this guy sounds pretty intense. Where can I get a sword like that?

:4palutena: From any good divine weapons specialist, of course!

:4pit: Oh, so you think if I asked Dyntos nicely, he would--?

:4palutena: I was being ironic, Pit.

:4pit: Oh. Right.

:4pit: Lady Palutena, this lady's giving me a weird vibe. Who is she?

:4palutena: That's Tiki, servant of the Divine Dragon, Naga. She was once the princess of the Divine Dragon tribe, and she was a vital ally of the Hero-King Marth way back when. Centuries later, she's still going strong, and she's even crossed passed with the Hero-King's descendants along the way!

:4pit: Oh, neat. Wait...centuries?!

:4palutena: That's right! As a Divine Dragon, Tiki is immortal, and it's her job to discern the word of Naga and impart it unto the mortal world.

:4pit: Whoah, we're getting into "unto" territory. So she serves a goddess too, huh?

:4palutena: Precisely. Tiki is the avatar and mouthpiece of Naga, hence her title, "Voice of Naga". Owing to her Manakete heritage, she can use the mystical Dragonstone to unleash her true power as a Divine Dragon. In this form, she can breathe holy flames blessed by Naga herself, and she's even got powerful claws that'll do some serious damage. She may look dainty, but she's no pushover!

:4pit: Huh, and I thought priests were supposed to be peaceful. She must've been asleep for a long time, though - I'll bet she's almost as old as you, Lady Palutena!

:4palutena: ...

:4pit: That...that was a joke! Ha ha! It's okay to laugh! Uh...Lady Palutena?

:4palutena: Y'know what, Pit? Since you're so smart, maybe you should figure this one out for yourself.

:4pit: Wait, what?! N-no! I was just kidding! Lady Palutena?!

:4palutena: Sorry, Pit, can't hear you! Dear me, I must be going deaf in my old age!

:4pit: I'M SORRY I'M SORRY I'M SORRY I'M SORRY! LADY PALUTEEEENAAAA!

:4pit: Hey, Lady Palutena, I think this little blob thing is lost. Is it somebody's pet?

:4palutena: That's no pet, Pit. That's Bandana Dee!

:4pit: Gesundheit.

:4palutena: No, I mean, his name is Bandana Dee. He's one of King Dedede's most trusted vassals and the leader of the Waddle Dee army. Unlike most of his pals, he's pretty easy-going, and is actually good friends with Kirby. You can distinguish him from his fellow footsoldiers by the blue bandana and trusty spear he carries.

:4pit: Oh, okay. So he's like the captain of the guard or something?

:4palutena: In a manner of speaking.

:4pit: Sweet! He's just like me! Hey, I wonder if he'll let me pet him?

:4palutena: I, uh, wouldn't do that if I were you. Despite his cuddly appearance, Bandana Dee is a fearsome fighter: he's a master of spear-based combat, and he'll gladly put his life on the line to defend his beloved king!

:4pit: No way, Lady Palutena! He's not a warrior, he's just a cute widdle - OW! HE POKED ME IN THE EYE!

:4palutena: I did warn you...

:4pit: OW, OW, OW, OW! LADY PALUTENA, I CAN'T SEE!

:4palutena: I wonder if Dedede would be willing to trade captains?

:4pit: Lady Palutena, this guy sure looks like he's ready for a battle!

:4palutena: That's Henry Fleming, Pit. And you'd better believe he's ready for a battle! He's the leader of the elite task force known as Unit S.T.E.A.M. - Strike Team Eliminating the Alien Menace! He's personally drafted by Abraham Lincoln, President of the United States of American, to help in the struggle against the alien invaders that threaten Earth.

:4pit: United States of What-now? Earth?

:4palutena: Oh, it's in another world, Pit. Don't worry about the little details, just focus on the battle at hand!

:4pit: Alrighty then! So what's up with that gun of his?

:4palutena: I'm glad you asked! Fleming's gun, as with all of his technology, is powered by steam. The more steam Fleming has at his disposal, the more powerful his attacks! His weapons will gather steam over time, so don't let him get too comfortable, or he'll be blowing you away in no time at all! Watch out for his Eagle Strike especially: it's a powerful and patriotic blast that'll send you halfway to the moon before you can say "apple pie"!

:4pit: Okay, good to know! I gotta say, Unit S.T.EA.M. sounds like a pretty cool name for a team. Why can't we have a snazzy title like that?

:4palutena: What's wrong with Palutena's Army?

:4pit: Nothing, nothing at all! But it's kinda...bland, y'know?

:4palutena: Alright. What would you suggest?

:4pit: How about Team D.I.V.I.N.E. - Dealing Ice-cold Vengeance to the Insolent Netherworld Enemies!

:4palutena: Not bad, but it's bit of a mouthful, isn't it?

:4pit: Okay, okay. How about if we became a team of stylish super-spies? We could wear high heels and strike cool poses and everything! We'll be called Pit's Angels!

:4palutena: If it's all the same to you, Pit, I think I'll handle the nomenclature.

:4pit: Wait, hold on! I'm just getting started!

:4palutena: That's what I was afraid of.
 
Joined
Feb 14, 2015
Messages
1,927
Location
Sudbury, Ontario, Canada
NNID
Ridleylash
3DS FC
1736-1657-3905
May as well, since I'm already here;

Pit: Wait, is this some kind of dragon?
Palutena: That's actually Ridley, leader of a criminal organization known as the Space Pirates.
Pit: But we already fought Space Pirates, and this guy wasn't there...
Ridley: Because those Space Pirates were not the ones I command, you imbecile.
Pit: Hey! I'm not an imbecile....right, Lady Palutena?
Palutena: Welll....
Pit: That doesn't bode well.
Ridley: Anyways, I look forward to ripping you into pieces on the battlefield, whelp. It'll at least entertain me.
Pit: "Ripping me to pieces"?! Can I get someone else to fight?!
Pit: Whoah, who's the supersized crocodile brandishing a cape?
Palutena: Pit, honestly; do you not know who this is?
Pit: Wait, wasn't he in that Mario baseball game on the Wii?
Viridi: King K.Rool is the Bowser to Donkey Kong's Mario, really. He's out to steal DK's food so he can make the Kongs starve to death, defying the natural order!
Palutena: Doesn't seem like the most friendly of characters, really.
Pit: Wait, did he just pull out a blunderbuss?!
Palutena
: Good luck, Pit!
 
Last edited:

Sonsa

Smash Champion
Joined
Sep 27, 2013
Messages
2,005
I've got one for Mewtwo even though he's confirmed, but this is just what I hope his codec is:

:4pit:Ohh, is this Mewtwo?
:4palutena:Yes, it is! How did you know?
:4pit:Some of the veterans here talked about how they hoped he would help when that whole Subspace War was going on since most of them fought him before? Guess he was busy or somethin though.
:4palutena:Oh, interesting. Well yeah, Mewtwo has recently discovered his full potential with his Mega Evolution: Mega Mewtwo Y!
:4pit:Mega Mewtwo...Y?
:4palutena:Because he gets even stronger!
:4pit:No I mean... well anyway, how did he learn how to do that?
:4palutena:It's kind of a mystery. But I know a bit about his origin! Scientists tried cloning the famous Pokemon, Mew, but kinda messed up and made Mewtwo! He turned out to be a lot angrier and chaotic than they hoped.
:4pit:Oh, he's just like Pittoo!
:4palutena:Hey, yeah, I guess so, that's one way to think of it!
:4pit:So I'm Pittoo's Mew!
:4palutena:...Sure! Anyway, watch out, Mewtwo is the strongest Pokemon! He can temporarily break your mind with just a stare! He can toss you around with telekinesis! He can be almost anywhere with teleportation! He can even predict your next move with his telepathy!
:4pit:...aren't...we communicating through telepathy...?
:4mewtwo:...
 

Senatiator

Smash Apprentice
Joined
Nov 2, 2014
Messages
112

Snake: Otacon, what do Pac Pellets taste like? Is it true they taste like cookies?

Otacon: What? How can you think of food when you’re in such serious trouble? You’re fighting Pac-Man, Snake!

Snake: So? All he does is run away from ghosts and eat pellets.

Otacon: That’s exactly the point, Snake! Years of escaping from ghosts whilst trapped in a maze has made him a master of evasion and turning the tables! He’s lead whole armies of ghosts around a corner just to lead them into a trap that devours them in seconds!

Otacon: He’s got other tricks, too! Butt bounces, pac dot shots, rev rolls, Fire Hydrant Sentries the list goes on!

Snake: Yeah, but he can’t harm me if he doesn’t get a power pellet, right?

Otacon: Not quite, Snake. Pac-Man may need power pellets to deal with ghosts, but he’s more than capable of unleashing his fists on a physical opponent… or his mouth, if he’s hungry.

Snake: What?!? Urgh, no wonder he’s wearing such a predatory smile. He was waiting for me to make a mistake all this time!

Snake: So, Otacon, how do I beat Pac-Man?

Otacon: You can’t.

Snake: WHAT?!?

Otagon: The game was intended to go on indefinitely, but a glitch in the programming means level 256 is unbeatable, so…

Snake: That’s not what I- You know what? Never mind. I’ll just try painting my grenades yellow, maybe that will fool him.

Snake: Miller, mind telling me what a winged woman is doing here?
Hades: Who is this Miller you are speaking about, and you are not fighting a mere mortal human, you are fighting a goddess of light.
Snake: Again? How are people getting this frequency? Who are you?
Hades: Someone who wants Paluey to be beaten, although since she is a goddess, and she can reflect or counter you, you won't really win.
Snake: You would be surprised at what I done....
Hades: Oh right, name is Hades, you are fighting Palutena, careful of her auto-lasers, it will be shocking to you.
Snake: Aren't you supposed to help me by telling me ideas on how to fight her, instead of messing with me?
Hades: Please, a so called soldier who destroyed Metal Gears, beaten FOXHOUND vs a goddess, course I know who will win, but its more fun to see you fail.
  • If Snake gets KOed by Palutena while on the codec:
Hades: (sarcastic)Wow, you sure did well against her. Do make sure you try to beat her next time.
 

Quillion

Smash Hero
Joined
Sep 17, 2014
Messages
5,674
Okay, seriously. How do I make a spoiler tag with a label? All I can do is a label-less spoiler tag.
 

MoveMan1

Smash Journeyman
Joined
Apr 7, 2015
Messages
308

Snake: Otacon, what do Pac Pellets taste like? Is it true they taste like cookies?

Otacon: What? How can you think of food when you’re in such serious trouble? You’re fighting Pac-Man, Snake!

Snake: So? All he does is run away from ghosts and eat pellets.

Otacon: That’s exactly the point, Snake! Years of escaping from ghosts whilst trapped in a maze has made him a master of evasion and turning the tables! He’s lead whole armies of ghosts around a corner just to lead them into a trap that devours them in seconds!

Otacon: He’s got other tricks, too! Butt bounces, pac dot shots, rev rolls, Fire Hydrant Sentries the list goes on!

Snake: Yeah, but he can’t harm me if he doesn’t get a power pellet, right?

Otacon: Not quite, Snake. Pac-Man may need power pellets to deal with ghosts, but he’s more than capable of unleashing his fists on a physical opponent… or his mouth, if he’s hungry.

Snake: What?!? Urgh, no wonder he’s wearing such a predatory smile. He was waiting for me to make a mistake all this time!

Snake: So, Otacon, how do I beat Pac-Man?

Otacon: You can’t.

Snake: WHAT?!?

Otagon: The game was intended to go on indefinitely, but a glitch in the programming means level 256 is unbeatable, so…

Snake: That’s not what I- You know what? Never mind. I’ll just try painting my grenades yellow, maybe that will fool him.

Snake: Miller, mind telling me what a winged woman is doing here?
Hades: Who is this Miller you are speaking about, and you are not fighting a mere mortal human, you are fighting a goddess of light.
Snake: Again? How are people getting this frequency? Who are you?
Hades: Someone who wants Paluey to be beaten, although since she is a goddess, and she can reflect or counter you, you won't really win.
Snake: You would be surprised at what I done....
Hades: Oh right, name is Hades, you are fighting Palutena, careful of her auto-lasers, it will be shocking to you.
Snake: Aren't you supposed to help me by telling me ideas on how to fight her, instead of messing with me?
Hades: Please, a so called soldier who destroyed Metal Gears, beaten FOXHOUND vs a goddess, course I know who will win, but its more fun to see you fail.
  • If Snake gets KOed by Palutena while on the codec:
Hades: (sarcastic)Wow, you sure did well against her. Do make sure you try to beat her next time.
Hey, I wrote that Pacman codex back on TvTropes! And that Palutena codex is from TvTropes too! Don't just copy other people's work without telling us where it came from!
 

Quillion

Smash Hero
Joined
Sep 17, 2014
Messages
5,674
Hey, I wrote that Pacman codex back on TvTropes! And that Palutena codex is from TvTropes too! Don't just copy other people's work without telling us where it came from!
Yeah, I remembered that from TVTropes. Will credit you.
 

JamesDNaux

Smash Hero
Joined
Jun 14, 2013
Messages
7,760
Location
Studio Naux
NNID
JamesDNaux
A Guidance of a Bear and Bird? That really would be quite absurd!
:4pit:Lady Palutena! That bear is holding a bird hostage in his backpack!
:4palutena:That bird isn't captive, Pit, that's Banjo and Kazooie. They've worked together many times to stop the evil witch Gruntilda from accomplishing her evil plots. They were big platforming icons of their time, their many fans really worked to get them here.
:4pit:They were really that popular? I guess people really like heroes that take down old hags!
Listen here you little twit, say that again and I'll toss you down a pit!
:4pit:Gah! It's some kind of goblin!
:4palutena:You fiend! How did you hack into my divine frequency?
Your divine frequency? Please! I found my way here with ease.
:4pit:I'm still in the middle of a fight here!
Listen well, I'll help you out, but only so you can thrash that pair about! The bird can fly and fire eggs, and run quick with her chicken legs. Don't forget the hairy dope, he'll whack you good and then you'll mope!
:4pit:Uh, thanks, I think?
:4palutena:Well that was certainly... helpful of you.
Now off I go, so don't delay, win this match and make my day!
 

MoveMan1

Smash Journeyman
Joined
Apr 7, 2015
Messages
308
That would be a good guidance... Except it would require Grunty to actually talk, and that's a big no-no.
 

Sonsa

Smash Champion
Joined
Sep 27, 2013
Messages
2,005
That would be a good guidance... Except it would require Grunty to actually talk, and that's a big no-no.
Nah, she can do her usual grunting and cackling noises while you just read the subtitles. Aint no biggie!
 

War Anvil

Smash Lord
Joined
Aug 20, 2011
Messages
1,192
Location
You're all nerds
NNID
BattlingIronItem
3DS FC
2208-4585-5395
Switch FC
SW-5940-1276-1225
:4pit:Something's up with that girl. Is she associated with the Underworld?
:4palutena:That's Shantae.
:4pit:Shantae? That sounds un...trustworthy.
:4palutena:Not really - she's the fearsome Half-Genie Hero. Shantae's ponytail serves as a whip-sword all by itself.
:4pit:Doubt it.
:4palutena:And that's not all. By dancing, she can transform into various creatures: a monkey, an elephant, a harpy, or some sort of mermaid.
:4pit:Greeeeeat. So it's like Thanatos, but more annoying. Then she's some Underworld girl.
:4palutena:Don't worry, she--
:substitute:(Actually Shantae masquerading as Pseudo-Palutena) HEY!
:4pit:Meep! L-Lady--
:substitute:Ah-HEM. What makes you think of your precious Underworld when you see someone like me?!
:4pit:I dunno. The hair a-and that outfit and...and the fact that you just cut off my telepathic communications!
:substitute:Hah, I'll give you that last one. Actually, I was born on Earth...or maybe something called the Genie Realm. Genie mom, human dad. Got it?!
:4pit:Okay, you're creeping me out, too?! That's it! I'll show you the power of the light, whether you like it or not!
:substitute:Have at ya, bub! Even without magic, YOU'LL BE FEELING THIS ONE IN THE MORNING!
:4palutena:How in the... (Beat) Pit?! Are you there?!

Just pretend Shantae interfered on Palutena's side in order to scare Pit straight.:troll:
 
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udime123

Smash Journeyman
Joined
Aug 7, 2014
Messages
218
Location
Subspace
3DS FC
3497-1825-3744
Pit: Is he doing okay?
Palutena: That's Elvin Gadd, E.Gadd for short.
Pit: He looks like he's had too much coffee.
Palutena: Be careful, Pit, if he sucks you in with his Poltergust, he can spit you into a dangerous combo. But son't worry too much. He's wide open when he uses it, so all you have to do is attack him from behind when he tries to suck you in.
Pit: You sure I can't try to distract him with cofee or something? He really looks like he runs a coffee shop on the side.
 
D

Deleted member

Guest
-beep beep-
-SWOOSH!-

Snake : Otacon, who's this strange guy in a bull costume?

Otacon : That's Black Shadow, F-ZERO Pilot #30. He is Captain Falcon's greatest rival!

Snake : I see. Wonder how that stuff turns out on the racetrack.

Otacon : His machine the Black Bull is specially designed for some serious damage to others. It even has the highest top speed of them all, like a charging bull!

Snake : Woah, what about outside the cockpit though? What should i look out for?

Otacon : Just look out for his moves altogether. He has great power mixed with a fair share of very dark magic as his specialties.

Snake : Got it.

- Exit swoosh -

Pit : Uhhh.. Lady Palutena, who is this strange bull guy and that evil magic he has? Is he a Underworld solider?

Palutena : Nope, he is a F-Zero racer just like Captain Falcon. His machine is the Black Bull and it's number is #30. His high experience with that and black magic allows him to carry out his grudge against Falcon.

Pit : Really though, those attacks REALLY hurt!

Palutena : That is due to his great strength, unrivaled by many in his world. Even there he is the Emperor of Evil, and he's got just the right amount to crush the world.

Pit : Oh man!

Palutena : So you must give it your all to stop him. Many of his attacks hit greater than many of the fighters here, but as a result he leaves himself VERY wide open alot. Careful and quick strikes with your blades will lead you to victory! Especially firing projectiles to keep your distance.

Tried to make it sound real... i tried!
 
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Marigi174

Smash Journeyman
Joined
Oct 7, 2014
Messages
284
NNID
Marigi174
3DS FC
3652-0615-5300
Doing Palutena's guidance for the greatest duo in smash.
Pit: Hey! There are two of them. Isn't that cheating?
Palutena: Those are the Ice Climbers. They never split up willingly.
Pit: It's so hard to focus on them both...
Palutena: They are truely a daunting foe.
Viridi: Don't you two get it yet?
Pit: What are you doing here?
Palutena: What don't we get?
Viridi: They are the toughest opponents you will ever face when they are together. However, if you can force them apart they become easy to handle.
Hades: Aaw. Are you having trouble with little two toddlers with hammers? It's so hard to feel pity for Pitty when he is so weak.
Pit: You too? Wow. Today's just not my day.
Palutena: Honestly. You don't ever give us a break do you.
Hades: I would if there was a war to be fought, but my forces are taking a holiday with you out of the picture, so I thought I'd take one too. Besides: I could be of use to you for once. Or I could be saying that just to double-cross you. Now forever after I give you this information you will be in doubt as to whether I am helping you beat this duo.
Palutena: What was the real reason you came here?
Hades: Just to torment you. Cheerio!
Palutena: What's up with him?
Viridi: Just use my advice and stop wasting time...
 
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Villager's_Mewtwo

Smash Cadet
Joined
Apr 3, 2015
Messages
45
NNID
Mewtwo12
3DS FC
0602-6514-9988
Palutena's Guidance:Lana
Who's this Lady Palutena?
That's Lana, a Hyrulian Warrior also known as 'The White Sorceress'.
So she's a magic user then? That means her weakness must be when I bring the fight up close and personal!
I wouldn't be so sure Pit, other then her tome she also has a deku spear for melee combat.
That things a spear? It looks more like a big twig to me.
Don't let it's weak appearance fool you it was a gift from the Great Deku Tree and allows Lana to also wield water magic while her tome allows her to use some kind of barrier magic.
Not as harmless as I thought then...Looks like this is gonna be a tough battle. I hope there's some heart pieces around
Or perhaps you'd rather find floor ice cream instead.
 

Cool Typhlosion

Smash Apprentice
Joined
Jan 18, 2015
Messages
128
For Pokemon trainer
:4pit:: Havent seen him in Forever .Probably late for the party Because He/She lost Charizard

:4palutena::Actually its because He doesnt Rely on pokemon anymore . Now he uses items like Rods and Bikes
:4pit:: I dont know if thats the strongest weapon choise
Viridi: Its about time , I think he tired Poor Ivysaur and squirtle out
:4palutena:: Don't underestimate him. He can use a special flute to summon a ledgendary pokemon
:4pit::Cant be worse than Hades
 

Quillion

Smash Hero
Joined
Sep 17, 2014
Messages
5,674
For Pokemon trainer
:4pit:: Havent seen him in Forever .Probably late for the party Because He/She lost Charizard

:4palutena::Actually its because He doesnt Rely on pokemon anymore . Now he uses items like Rods and Bikes
:4pit:: I dont know if thats the strongest weapon choise
Viridi: Its about time , I think he tired Poor Ivysaur and squirtle out
:4palutena:: Don't underestimate him. He can use a special flute to summon a ledgendary pokemon
:4pit::Cant be worse than Hades
It's kinda hard to read...
 

Guybrush20X6

Creator of Lego Theory
Joined
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Messages
15,882
NNID
Guybrush20X6
3DS FC
4253-3477-4804
Switch FC
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I'll try a Snake Codec

Snake: Mei Ling, there's a kid in a costume with a working laser
Mei Ling: That's Mega Man, he may look like a cute child but he's actually a super fighting robot.
Mei Ling: Not only does he have his own Mega Buster but he also uses the weaponry of his defeated foes. Kind of like you Snake.
Snake: But why does a he look like a child. To get my guard down?
Mei Ling: He was a built as a surrogate son by the brilliant inventor Dr Light but when Dr Willy's forces threatened the world, Rock volenteered to become Mega Man and fight the evil robot masters.
Snake: Another child soldier...
Mei Ling: You always find a way to put a downer on things.
 

bksbestbwoy

Smash Lord
Joined
Oct 11, 2007
Messages
1,465
Location
Brooklyn, NY
NNID
AzureJay89
3DS FC
4828-5479-7054
Switch FC
2162-7423-7143
Pit: "Hey, check this guy out! Love the vintage look!"
Palutena: "That's Takamaru, hero of the Edo period. He's a brave young samurai that was tasked with raiding the strongholds of fellow Edo lords manipulated by an extraterrestrial force that made its residence in the Mysterious Murasame Castle."
Pit: "That sounds familiar."
Viridi: "Say what you will about his feats, but isn't he just another ordinary swordsman? Personally, I think we should kick them all out, exception going to that dreamboat Link."
Palutena: "Coincidentally, the two characters have a bit in common with their shared birth year of 1986."
Pit: "Hey, isn't that my birth year?"
Viridi: "From what I've heard, it's also Samus' as well."
Pit: "Oh sweet, we're quadruplets!"
Palutena: "Anyway... Takamaru is very proficient with the ways of iaido sword play. He also has talent with gifts he acquired from friendly raccoon dogs including a cloak that renders him invisible, will-o-wisp fireballs and gigantic lightning strikes. Be very careful when engaging him."
Viridi: "Wait, he's that proficient with both fire and lightning and a friend of nature too? I wonder if Phosphora would mind having a new co-captain..."

Pit: "Hey, check this guy out! Love the vintage look!"
Palutena: "That's Takamaru, hero of the Edo period. He's a brave young samurai that was tasked with raiding the strongholds of fellow Edo lords manipulated by an extraterrestrial force that made its residence in the Mysterious Murasame Castle."
Viridi: "I like to believe that I'm good with my knowledge on the fighters here, but I am drawing a complete blank on this one."
Palutena: "Understandable -- Takamaru has played it low key ever since defeating the menace that threatened his lands. Only the people in that region knew about his legacy. Doesn't help that his last active role was thirty years ago."
Pit & Viridi: "THIRTY YEARS?!"
Palutena: "Yeah, seems like he's been looking for a new spotlight to stand under recently."
Pit: "I can relate. So Lady Palutena, what's the plan?"
Palutena: "Takamaru is very proficient with the ways of iaido sword play and can also fight at range with pinwheel blades, will-o-wisps and lightning blasts."
Pit: "...it's like fighting Pyrron, Phosphora and Magus all at once then... Great."

Pit: "Lady Palutena, there's a guy down here with a yo-yo and phenomenal psychic ability giving me the business. Says he's from Americola. Sounds tasty."
Palutena: "...Ness?"
Pit: "...iiiiif Ness were 5' 10" and built like an athlete maybe."
Viridi: "If we're going to do this song and dance every time you're unfamiliar with someone, how do you ever expect to do well in these fights?"
Palutena: "This is really odd, are you sure there's someone else down there with you? There's nothing coming up here."
Pit: "Hey guys, I'm seriously at a loss here, could you--
*static gets more intense as you hear Pit, Palutena and Viridi squabble with one another fading into white noise*
*static interruption gets louder as barely discernable voice is heard*
???: "Adjusting telepathic frequency, given current cosmic interference, a sync rate of 727GHz should be fine..."
???: "Ah here we go, Mike? Miiiiiiike! Michael Jones, pick up~!"
Mike: "Mica? What's up? Been a while since I've heard your voice!"
Mica: "Not much, just thought I would let you know that there are some weirdos trying to pick your head for details in this area. Stay sharp!"
Mike: "No worries, I've still got the Island Star to sort things out with and I know Chief Coralcola and the rest of them are still beckoning the Southern Cross for my continued well being. If all else fails, I made sure to pack all the throwing weapons I could from the last visit to Coralcola. Uncle Jones thought I should carry the Oxford Wonder World with me, but I don't know if I want to be flung through time again... Or worse."
Mica: "I'm glad you're in such high spirits Mike, but do take care. The family and I will be spectating from Neo Argonia. Make sure you do your best!"
Mike: "Awesome. Tell everyone I said hi!"
*sounds like a radio station tuning rapidly play out*
*you can barely make out the commentary of Pit, Palutena and Viridi coming to a climax as a frustrated Pit desperately yells something to the effect of "HOW CAN HUMANS BLOCK TELEPATHIC CHANNELS?"*
Palutena *fully audible*: ---I heard putting bananas in your ears could work..."

Pit: "Lady Palutena, there's a guy down here with a yo-yo and phenomenal psychic ability giving me the business. Says he's from Americola. Sounds tasty."
Palutena: "That's Mike Jones."
Viridi: "...WHO?"
Palutena: "He's a regular teen with some irregular circumstances. His Uncle, Dr. Jones, is a well regarded archaeologist who spent some time in the tropics researching some strange phenomena, most of which were not so pleasant. After Dr. Jones was kidnapped by extraterrestrial forces interested in his research, Mike arrived on the scene and using clues left through multiple islands and their cavernous ruins, he tracked down his Uncle, stormed the alien spaceship and defeated Zoda, the leader of these forces before he could continue his pillaging of planets."
Pit: "Whoa, this guy's awesome. I don't know how he did it without the power of flight. Or any miracle really."
Palutena: "And to think that was his summer vacation... Shortly after that, the poor guy found himself hurled through time and once again had to rely on his own developing abilities and quick thinking to chase echoes of Zoda through different periods of history."
Viridi: "This kid's luck is the worst."
Palutena: "I wouldn't say that, he did make some pretty notable friends on that field trip through history."
Pit: "I wonder if he's knows anything about that statue of Cleopatra enjoying a pepperoni slice..."
Palutena: "He seemingly also has a bit of an admirer in the first princess of Argonia, one of the survivors of Zoda's planetary onslaughts who he rescued. She's a cutie."
Pit: "...aaaaaand now I don't feel so bad for him anymore. So how do I go about beating him?"
Palutena: "Mike is an varsity level ace at pitching so his use of the Island Star flail is second to none. Beyond this, he has a pretty crazy repertoire of projectiles that could make it a hassle to get in on. Reflect them if he gets too predictable."
Viridi: "That's a lot of work. Why don't you just drown him?"
Pit & Palutena: "..."
Viridi: "WHAT? I just found out he can't swim. How lame is that? You travel the world with your uncle on these expeditions and you never learned how to swim? Pfft haha!"

Tried my hand at this. Had a little fun with the Mike ones. lol
 
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Marigi174

Smash Journeyman
Joined
Oct 7, 2014
Messages
284
NNID
Marigi174
3DS FC
3652-0615-5300
Ok. I've got some possible characters from the Inazuma Eleven universe for Palutena's guidance snippits.
Pit: Well he seems energetic.
Palutena: That's Mark Evans. He's the first captain of Raimon Jr. High's soccer club. He's a football* freak.
Pit: Then why's he here instead of playing soccer?
Palutena: The same reason as us! He got a letter inviting him to knock the whits out of everyone here!
Pit: I didn't get a letter yet I'm still in this game...
Palutena: You're a veteran who is also Sakurai's creation. Was that what he was visiting about? If that wasn't what it was about you must have got a letter, as otherwise I see no reason why Wolf or the Ice Climbers shouldn't be h--
Pit: But that's beside the point. Do you have any advice for beating this guy?
Palutena: Well, I expect he has brought his skills as a goalkeeper with him. I know he automatically catches any items thrown at him, so make sure that if you need to use them they have indirect ways of dealing damage to him. Also he's immune to the soccer ball item.
Pit: Is... that all you've got?
Palutena: Well, you can expect him to have high defenses, and be aware of his Megaton Head and Fist of Justice.
Pit: ... those sound... kinda terrifying...
Palutena: Also, he has the tallest grab with his God Hand V, so be careful of that.
Pit: At least it doesn't go far out... right?
Palutena: Well...
Pit: That's not very reassuring...
Palutena: He does have one flaw though.
Pit: What is it?
Palutena: If you keep hitting him with items and projectiles -- including the soccer ball -- his stress meter will increase. When it reaches max, he gets stunned - but not in the same way as if you were to break his shield or hit him with a deku nut.
Pit: If that's not what you mean by stunned, what do you mean?
Palutena: Stun lasts for 20 seconds, and he takes double damage and recieves heavy knockback. That is your chance to really deal some damage to him.
Pit: Sweet! I guess I'd better just be cheap and not get in close then.
Palutena: I wouldn't get so cocky. He can cover up this weakness very well by kicking and throwing soccer balls at you, and his stun meter is constantly depleting, so you have to bombard him with a series of high-accuracy projectiles if you want to stun him.
Pit: Hmm... This is going to be tough...
Pit: Who's this?
Palutena: That is Arion Sherwind (JP: Matsukaze Tenma): the captain of Raimon Jr. High's current soccer club.
Pit: What can he do? He looks... kinda wimpy.
Palutena: I wouldn't let my guard down if I were you.
Pit: Why not?
Palutena: He has a very strong will, and you need to be careful of his hissatsu.
Pit: Hissatsu?
Palutena: It means 'certain kill.'
Pit: W-WHAT?!
Palutena: Don't take it literally. They are just powerful.
Pit: I'm still scared...
Palutena: However, when he uses them his TP gets used up. Each one needs a certain amount of TP to be used, so he has to think before he spams them.
Pit: So... he can use a few and then he's crippled?
Palutena: Not permanently. TP restores over time, so he can use them again later.
Pit: So I want to force his TP down and go for major damage when he can't use them?
Palutena: Yes, but keep an eye on the meter. If you get hit with one, it will deal very high damage and knockback.
Pit: OK. Got i -- wait: you sound unfinished. Is there another catch?
Palutena: Well, he can kick footballs at you to help him recharge his TP meter by keeping you at a distance.
Pit: So it isn't as simple as going in when he has no TP...
Palutena: Sadly, no.
Pit: Well this just got a whole lot more interesting.
Pit: This can't be true.
Palutena: What can't be true?
Pit: There are eleven of them! Isn't that cheating?
Palutena: Don't worry. They don't all fight at the same time.
Pit: "At the same time?"
Palutena: The player that is active changes in the place of taunts. Also their goalkeeper is summoned when the shield or grab button is pressed.
Pit: This is confusing...
Dark Pit: Why do you even try Palutena?
Pit: Pittoo!
Dark Pit: DON'T CALL ME THAT!
Pit: sorry...
Palutena: I try because I don't want Pit to lose unless its against me.
Dark Pit: Well you're not being very helpful to him right now. Listen to me Pit - I'll explain it better than her grace.
Pit: Hit me!
Dark Pit: OK
Pit: No! Not actually!
Dark Pit: Heh...
Palutena: Just get on with it already. Now's not the time for petty squabbling.
Dark Pit: They work as a team, taking the ball one at a time. They use their different skills in a similar way to how Shulk changes his stats using the Monado.
Pit: Wait: so I have to take five sets of skills into consideration?
Dark Pit: Yes. They all have pros and cons when compared to one another, different specia, and by rapidly switching between players they can not only stagger their movement, but also they can really confuse you.
Pit: They sound really difficult to beat.
Dark Pit: You need to adjust your playstyle according to the player you're against at that time. Fast midfielders are used in combination with powerful forwards to get in fast and deal heavy damage, defenders are good at absorbing hits, taking reduced knockback and damage, and the goalkeeper takes hits even better, being knocked back even less and taking even more reduced damage in addition to automatically catching items.
Pit: Then what's the point of defenders if the goalkeeper just does it better?
Dark Pit: He is very slow.
Pit: Oh...
Dark Pit: However, they don't have complete control over who gets called up. With only three taunts available, a player is selected at random corresponding to their position (defender, midfielder and forward). Additionally, each player can only be out for so long in a stock before they get exhausted.
Pit: So... I need to focus on exhausting them?
Dark Pit: Precisely. If only you had a weapon capable of making approach impossible...
Pit: Oh you're one to talk. At least I can aim my arrows.
Dark Pit: But you are so weak that you could never tire anyone out by doing anything but talki-
Palutena: STOP!
Pit: What's the matter Lady Palutena?
Palutena: Stop arguing. Jesus Christ almighty.
Pit: Who's Jesus Christ?
Palutena: Did I say Jesus? It's noone. Don't worry.
Pit: It can't be noone. Otherwise you wouldn't have said it.
Palutena: Let's just forget I said anything.
Dark Pit: I think her grace has something she doesn't want us to know...
 
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Mario & Sonic Guy

Old rivalries live on!
Joined
Sep 18, 2007
Messages
22,423
Location
Mushroom Kingdom
NNID
TPitch5
3DS FC
5327-1637-5096
I have one for Wolf...
  • Pit: Lady Palutena, did Fox change his looks or something?
  • Palutena: Actually Pit, that is Wolf O'Donnell.
  • Viridi: He's the leader of a rag-tag mercenary team, known as Star Wolf.
  • Leon: And you better respect him too.
  • Pit: Wha, who are you?!
  • Leon: I'm one of lord Wolf's top mercenaries, Leon Powalski. And you better watch out, or he'll shred you to pieces. *laughs evilly*
  • Viridi: Who invited this quack?!
  • Leon: Watch your tongue, puny girl!!
  • Viridi: What did you just call me lizard?!
  • Palutena: Anyway, Wolf is an aggressive fighter who relies more on his quick reflexes than raw power. He's also on the heavier side, despite of his feral posture.
  • Pit: Okay, that's good to know.
  • Palutena: His Blaster is also unique in that the claw that's attached to it can damage you if you're too close to it.
  • Viridi: Wolf also has a Reflector, so your arrows won't do you any good against him.
  • Leon: In other words, you'll have to fight head-on, not that it will do you any good against lord Wolf.
  • Viridi: You must really idolize Wolf if you're so confident of his victory.
  • Pit: Hey, no matter the challenge, I'm ready.
  • Palutena: That's the spirit Pit, and good luck.
  • Leon: Yeah, good luck, because you'll be looking for a hospital once lord Wolf is done with you!
  • Viridi: Ugh! We get it already, so get out of here now!!
  • Leon: Fine, but you've been warned. *laughs evilly*
 
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TheDarkKnightNoivern

Smash Master
Joined
Jun 24, 2014
Messages
3,641
Location
Croft Manor
I have one for Wolf...
  • Pit: Lady Palutena, did Fox change his looks or something?
  • Palutena: Actually Pit, that is Wolf O'Donnell.
  • Viridi: He's the leader of a rag-tag mercenary team, known as Star Wolf.
  • Leon: And you better respect him too.
  • Pit: Wha, who are you?!
  • Leon: I'm one of lord Wolf's top mercenaries, Leon Powalski. And you better watch out, or he'll shred you to pieces. *laughs evilly*
  • Viridi: Who invited this quack?!
  • Leon: Watch your tongue, puny girl!!
  • Viridi: What did you just call me lizard?!
  • Palutena: Anyway, Wolf is an aggressive fighter who relies more on his quick reflexes than raw power. He's also on the heavier side, despite of his feral posture.
  • Pit: Okay, that's good to know.
  • Palutena: His Blaster is also unique in that the claw that's attached to it can damage you if you're too close to it.
  • Viridi: Wolf also has a Reflector, so your arrows won't do you any good against him.
  • Leon: In other words, you'll have to fight head-on, not that it will do you any good against lord Wolf.
  • Viridi: You must really idolize Wolf if you're so confident of his victory.
  • Pit: Hey, no matter the challenge, I'm ready.
  • Palutena: That's the spirit Pit, and good luck.
  • Leon: Yeah, good luck, because you'll be looking for a hospital once lord Wolf is done with you!
  • Viridi: Ugh! We get it already, so get out of here now!!
  • Leon: Fine, but you've been warned. *laughs evilly*
Lord??
 

Quillion

Smash Hero
Joined
Sep 17, 2014
Messages
5,674
I'd like this one to keep going for a bit more, if that's okay with everyone.
 

Yokta

That's Yoktastic!
Joined
May 20, 2014
Messages
543
Location
Everywhere and nowhere, all at once
"Don't underestimate him, Pit."
"Huh?"
"Just because Spyro is smaller than most dragons doesn't mean he'll be easy to take down."
"I wasn't thinking that!"
"You were definitely thinking that."
"Why would you think that?"
"First of all: Telepathy. Secondly, you were clearly winding up to kick him like a football.
"I wouldn't recommend you do that, Pit. Unless you want to get burned, electrocuted, frozen and buried. In that order."
"No, I'm pretty sure I do not want that."
"In that case, pay attention to the element Spyro is using. That element will dictate how some of his more dynamic attacks are executed, allowing you to counter his strengths and exploit his weaknesses."
"Gee, can't I just stick with the usual game plan? You know, hacky-slashy pointy-shooty. I mean, it worked on the big guys..."
"Sometimes I wonder if you only call for my help because you like the stimulating conversation."
"That's just the icing on the partnership cake, Lady Palutena!"
 

Quillion

Smash Hero
Joined
Sep 17, 2014
Messages
5,674
In other news, we know Mewtwo's Palutena's Guidance now:


It's the "unused" guidance that was in the files the whole time. This likely means that it will be the guidance for all DLC characters since reuniting the cast would take more resources than you think.

There's the off chance that they could be recording it as we speak and that it will be released for the normal release that's in two weeks, though.

Perhaps we could spam-ask Hynden Walch about the matter...
 
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Quillion

Smash Hero
Joined
Sep 17, 2014
Messages
5,674
And with Mewtwo's regular release, we know for sure that there's little-to-no chance of new Guidances being recorded.

Unless a miracle happens. Again, maybe we can request Hynden Walch en masse.
 

SMAASH! Puppy

Smash Legend
Joined
Feb 13, 2015
Messages
12,434
Location
Snake Man's stage from Metal Blade Solid
@ Quillion Quillion Can we still continue this thread though? I made a Palutena Guidance.

It's for Wolf Link & Midna. :3
Pit: Aww! Look at that wolf.
Palutena: Watch out Pit! That's Wolf Link.
Pit: That's Link?!? Viridi what did you do?!?
Viridi: I didn't do anything. That's what happens to Link when he enters the realm of Twilight. At least he's not a bunny rabbit or something.
Palutena: Link also has aid from Midna, the Twili on his back. She can guide Link's jumps, and use Dark Magic to help him defeat multiple opponents at once.
Pit: She helps him recover? Isn't that a little overpowered?
Palutena: Would you prefer I didn't give you the Power of Flight?
Pit: No no! I'm fine with outside help.
 

Laniv

Smash Champion
Joined
Apr 20, 2014
Messages
2,023
Pit: Is that... a tailor?

Palutena: That's the Savvy Stylist. She's a world famous fashion designer.

Pit: She seems pretty fashionable herself.

Viridi: What would you know about fashion, Pit?

Pit: (distressed) W-what?!

Viridi: I mean, come on! Who wears togas anymore?!

Pit: Can you tell about how she fights instead of making fun of me?

Palutena: Well, for starters, she fights with nothing but her innate sense of fashion. She can order in a clothes rack to sweep you
away. She can even crush you with a giant shoe!

Pit: A giant shoe?! Maybe instead of fighting, I can borrow some clothes for a bit.

Viridi: Goodness knows you'll need the advice.

Pit: Better than wearing leaves all day...

Pit: I wonder who this princess is.

Viridi: That's Princess Daisy of Sarasaland. You know, I kinda like her. She's carefree, really into gardening, and she doesn't get kidnapped, unlike certain princesses. Not a bad résumé for a human! Might even spare her...

Palutena: Not to mention she's a really good athlete.

Pit: Okay, so how do I--

Viridi: I mean, look at her! One of her moves is literally growing a flower bed! Now that's dedication!

Pit: More like obsession...

Viridi: Hey Pit, after this, see if you can convince Daisy to join the Forces of Nature!
 

Burruni

Smash Hero
Joined
Jul 8, 2014
Messages
9,408
Location
Some Netherworld
1) Bandana Dee

:4pit:: Hey... is it a good idea for such a little guy to carry a spear that big?
:4palutena:: That's Bandana Dee, an underdog hero for Dreamland. Don't let his small size fool you.
:4pit:: I can't help but think that it has to be hard to use it.....
:4palutena:: He'll keep you at range with his wide arsenal of skills with that spear, even fly with it!
:4pit:: Oh COME ON! Even the underdog heroes get to fly on their own?!
:4palutena:: Well just try to use that light weight of his to help kick-start that flight!

2) Inklings WARNING, PUNS ABOUND.

:4pit:: Does something smell fishy here?
:4palutena:: More like Kalamari, that's a creature called an "Inkling" whose life is full of a territorial war... a flat out Inkvasion!
:4pit:: Jeez... looks like they've got a variety splatter of weapons!
:4palutena:: Their squid form swims faster in the ink trails they shoot. They'll try to sneak behind you and let it riptide!
:4pit:: Well we'll just have to sea who can win it out!
:4palutena:: Remember that even Ink can be repelled like any other projectile and don't squid around!

3) Ganon

:4pit:: Is it just me.... or is there something chilling about this guy?
Viridi: I-I-It's him! The one and only King of Darkness, Ganon!
Hades: Really? I have to fight over the title to this undercooked bacon meal? Puh-lease!
Viridi: What he lacks in the arrogance of SOME people, he makes up for with a massive magical arsenal, and that trident isn't something to overlook either!
Hades: With such stubby pig's feet, he needs range like that to try to damage anyone.
:4pit:: That's... all the help you can give?!

4) King K. Rool

:4pit:: Is it just me or does this guy seem a little Krazy?
:4palutena:: That's K. Rool.. specifically as a King. He changes titles more than you dip in hotsprings.
:4pit:: When you're THAT big I don't think anyone's gonna stop you from doing that...
:4palutena:: He's got a big arsenal to match from all his fights against Donkey Kong as his crew, but he isn't going to get around fast weighed down by all that equipment.
:4pit:: Yeah! Wait... then why doesn't that stop me? Or Link?
:4palutena:: Simple, heroes always have a blessing of a Goddess to hold an infinite amount of tools without worrying about weight. Luckily for us there's NOTHING heroic about this Kroc!

Edit: Kept all of these to 6 Lines... I may try to expand them a little.
 
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Martingale

Smash Apprentice
Joined
Apr 2, 2015
Messages
127
Pit: Who's this guy, Lady Palutena?

Palutena: That's Professor Herschel Layton. He's a professor of archaeology at Gressenheller University, in London, England.

Pit: A college professor? What's he going to do, bore me to death by talking about fossils?

Viridi: That's the kind of talk that'll end up with you getting schooled.

Viridi: Layton is a true gentleman, and he's adventured across the world solving mysteries. If he hears you disrespecting him, he'll probably give you a puzzle for homework!

Pit: ...Puzzles don't sound very dangerous, Viridi.

Palutena: This puzzle might be. The Professor is a skilled fencer and surprisingly agile, so it's a mystery as to how you'll land a hit.

Pit: Wow. Thanks for the encouragement, Lady Palutena.

Palutena: Or how you'll manage to avoid getting pummelled by his Slot Machine Gun.

Pit: Machine gun?!? What am I supposed to do about that?!?

Palutena: Critical thinking is the key to success, Pit.

Pit: Wait... I can reflect the shots from the machine gun using my Guardian Orbitars, right?

Palutena: Puzzle solved!

Pit: Haha! Yes! Maybe if I show the Professor my puzzle-solving skills, he might take me on as an apprentice instead of fighting me!

Viridi: I think that position is already filled. Maybe he'll be polite and finish you off a little quicker.

Pit: What's that kid doing here?

Palutena: That's no kid, it's a squid! The Inklings are a species of genetically mutated squid that can switch between squid and humanoid form at will.

Pit: Genetic mutation? What's Viridi up to now?

Viridi: Hey, don't look at me, Pit! I'm pretty sure this was because of some meddling humans. I mean, look at how they dress-- it's almost as if they want to pretend be human teenagers!

Pit: A sea creature pretending to be a perfectly ordinary human? That's ridiculous!

Palutena: ...Anyway. The Inklings use colourful inks to attack, and can swim in it when in squid form, though they cannot attack as a squid.

Pit: Ugh... Do you know how hard this stuff is going to be to get off my wings?

Palutena: Consider it motivation to not get hit!

Pit: Um... Am I fighting... A fish?

Palutena: Oh, it's a Magikarp! This Pokemon is one of the most common in the universe, and is infamous for being pitifully weak.

Pit: So what's it doing here then? It kinda looks like it's having trouble breathing.

Palutena: I'd say that battling here is a good way to gain experience. It eventually will evolve into a large dragon-like monster called Gyarados.

Viridi: Hm, a pathetic creature that just might have a tiny bit of potential. Kinda reminds me of someone.

Pit: What do you mean, Viridi?

Viridi: Oh, nothing... You do sometimes appear to flail around like a fish out of water, after all.

Palutena: Which reminds me. Magikarp's Flail is a unique move which gets more powerful the more damage Magikarp has taken. It's best to keep your distance from a battered Magikarp.

Pit: Mm... Battered fish...

Palutena: Pit, focus!

Pit: Uh, looks like Mario's diet was a little too extreme. We need to get this guy some pizza fast!

Palutena: Don't worry, Pit! This is Paper Mario. He's supposed to be this thin.

Pit: Paper Mario? So this'll be an easy fight, right? If I flap my wings, he might blow away!

Palutena: Interdimensional travel can sometimes affect your weight. Paper Mario is really about as heavy as Kirby.

Pit: Uh... You don't think I gained any interdimensional weight, do you?

Palutena: Well, a few years ago you found flying a lot easier, so it might have happened. Don't worry, you might be paper thin after getting whacked by Paper Mario's hammer a few times!

Pit: You know what, I think I'm fine with the extra weight. It's all muscle, right?

Palutena: ...Sure! Anyway, Paper Mario has partners he can call into battle, as well as strange creatures known as Pixls. The Barry Pixl can be used to reflect projectiles, so be careful where you shoot.

Decided to do the four I'm supporting the most!
 

Aetheri

W/E happens don't panic...
Joined
Jan 13, 2015
Messages
8,847
Location
ZDR
Switch FC
SW-3397-5428-2304
Ah, What the hell....

:4pit:Pit: Uhhh.....Samus looks a little off. Kinda creepy even...

:4palutena:Palutena: Be careful Pit! That's not Samus, it's Dark Samus!

:4pit:Pit: Dark Samus? So, she's like a Pittoo for Samus?

:4palutena:Palutena: Not really. Dark Samus, though she looks similar, is very different from Samus. She's an alien metroid that absorbed Samus's Phazon Suit and even some of her DNA. She's dangerous and VERY powerful.

Viridi: Watch out for her Phazon attacks, Pit!!

:4pit:Pit: Uhh...What's Phazon?

Viridi: It's a radioactive substance that gives her power. But if you become afflicted by it you will be corrupted. You will be a lot more vulnerable to her attacks if that happens.

:4pit:Pit: Corrupted? I don't like the sound of that.

:4palutena:Palutena: Pit, I suggest that if you do get corrupted try to use that to your advantage as your attacks will get stronger, as well. Phazon causes mutations that both hinder you and help you! You'll have to be careful but strike hard at the right opportunity!

:4pit:Pit: Did you say mutations!!!? I'm not gonna sprout an extra head, am I!!? I really don't think I like this at all...

Viridi: Don't worry Pit, the effects of Phazon isn't permanent. That is, unless you've taken too much damage, in which case it is permanent.

:4pit:Pit: That didn't help! I still don't like it!
 
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Kangaexe

Smash Apprentice
Joined
Apr 21, 2015
Messages
81
Location
Australia, Sydney
NNID
onlykanga
3DS FC
2363-5649-9211
Snake: Huh, whose this kid

Mei Ling: Looks like an Inkling, a young yet threatening opponent, they use Ink as a source of damage and can even transform into a squid!

Snake: A squid? Strange... What should I look out for?

Mei Ling: Usual stuff Snake, try and avoid and hit when you can, theyre ink can be surprisingly dangerous so keep on your toes

Snake: Hmm, can Ink really splat on the battlefield?

Mei Ling: Well they can answer that question for you, over and out Snake.
 

Agent Emerald

Smash Journeyman
Joined
Oct 1, 2014
Messages
243
Pit: Who's that chick carrying all that stuff?

Palutena: That's an Anna, Pit. She's a travelling saleswoman, and is pretty good at her job.

Pit: Wait a second, that's AN Anna?

Palutena: Yep! There are loads of Annas traveling around the world, working all sorts of jobs. I heard some work in some pretty high places.

Pit: That's neat. I wonder what it'd be like if there were a whole bunch of mes? We'd be unstoppable!

Palutena: That'd be nice, but let's get back to the Anna you're fighting. She carries a wide arrangement of weapons she's collected over the years and isn't afraid to dirty some of her merchandise.

Pit: Sounds like she's really diversified.

Palutena: Yes, but there's one really important thing to look out for. If Anna gets the Smash ball, you'll- *call cuts*

Pit: I'll what? Lady Palutena? Are you still there?

Anna: Sorry, your line's been disconnected. To continue your call, please pay 30,000 hearts.

Pit: What?! I don't have that many hearts on me!

Anna: looks like you'll have to find out yourself what happens when my sister gets the Smash Ball.

Palutena: We all know this guy has no need for an introduction

Pit: Who'd think I'd be fighting THE Ryu!

Palutena: Pit, be careful. Ryu didn't become a world famous fighter with just his fireball, Dragon Punch, and Hurricane Kick. He's acquired a large number of martial art skills over the years, and hectic battles like this aren't new to him.

Pit: You'd think a career in martial arts would be kinda normal and not fighting monsters and comic book heroes with his bare hands.

Palutena: He has his strong will and never ending training to thank for that. He's picked up a real punch most people in his profession wouldn't have just by fighting normal people. Some of his attacks look a bit too brutal for someone like him.

Pit: I wonder why.

Palutena: Let's find that answer on the battlefield!

Pit: All right!
 
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