Lying for the Right Reason?

[OnyxVulpine]

I know they say honesty is the best policy but this has been bugging me for a while. I try to be a real honest guy, I don't like to lie unless I feel its absolutely necessary.

I have a friend (or a person) that I know, she tries so hard to be my best friend because she likes me (Or so I've heard) The truth is.. She really really bugs me, she has called me up to 20 times a day. She used to ask sometimes if I'm bugging her which I honestly say "Yes, a bit" and she would dim down the calls to mayve 2-3 a day but it picks up again in about a week.

Recently, she asked if I have a problem with her (Which I used to say "Not really") and I said "Kinda". I haven't asked her, but I heard from some of her friends that she said that she no longer likes me. I think shes really hurt and I don't like to be a mean guy either like saying mean things about people. And I'm wondering if it was right to say.

This also goes with what I am going with... In relationships there are things that happen. Like when the girl asks something like "Does this make me look fat?" or some things like that.

I'm not asking for advice. I'm simply asking around about.. since "Honesty is the best policy." Do you think there are times that lying is really appropriate? Most are going to say yes, but since I don't like to lie, no matter how little an effect it will have. Could not lying EVER get you into trouble through out your life?

*Sigh, hope this isn't a bad topic*
-Onyx

 

[KevinM]

This topic seems a little bit childish, might want to work on that.

As for if not lying would ever get you into trouble well in truth yes. You can still get into trouble for a number of other reasons, but you'd never get into trouble. If you're talking about little white lies such as, no that looks good on you, then you're not gonna hurt the person by telling them you don't think it goes with their person.

 

[Falco&Victory]

Well, oftentimes my parents will find their computer not working, and they forbid me to mess with it. While they're gone I fix it and they never find out. What does it mean? They save money, have their computer working to manage their money with, and I don't get in trouble.

Lying can sometimes be OK if someone is being irrational, but usually you want to live honestly.

 

[Sariku]

Lying for the Right Reason?

I can't think of a way to get this post long and drawn out, without going into childish examples, but yes, I suppose you can Lie for a good reason. Sometimes it can be useful I suppose... but it doesn't make it right, in my beliefs anyways.

 

[RDK]

What this really comes down to is what your personal beliefs are. If you have a religion that discourages lying, then that wouldn't be such a great thing to do.

Seeing as how I don't have a specific religion, I don't need to hold myself to those types of standards. I always try to tell the truth, as I'm the kind of person that calls it like it is and I like to be up-front with people. I can only hope that other people will try and do the same to me.

When it comes to personal gain, or if you're dealing with someone who isn't someone you would want to uphold a code of honor to, I would have no problem lying, as long as it doesn't effect the people I love.

 

[snex]

i dont get why people think "telling untruths" is one big category of actions that we must label as good or bad, all as one lump. you should examine the consequences of each action you can take and then take the action with the most desirable consequences. simple as that.

 

[TheBuzzSaw]

i dont get why people think "telling untruths" is one big category of actions that we must label as good or bad, all as one lump. you should examine the consequences of each action you can take and then take the action with the most desirable consequences. simple as that.

QFT. Lying is generally frowned upon (for good reason), but good people lie all the time, and it is not for evil demonic selfish reasons. You really have to examine the heart of any given situation. Also, remember that the definition of a lie is "anything said with the intent to deceive". So, even if your words are completely true from a technical standpoint, lying can still take place if you are well aware that the target will read too deeply into your statement and think the wrong thing.

EDIT -- I'm referring to a generic "you", not you, snex. >_<

 

[Evil Eye]

Lying for the sake of preserving someone's feelings, unless it endangers someone else's lives, is not wrong. Unless you are a staunch Catholic. But in a practical sense, it spares everyone heartbreak and irritation.

And lying to the women in your life for the aforementioned reason is almost always acceptable, as most ladies have a tendency to ask what I like to call "trap questions" -- give them a particular answer, or fear the consequences.

 

[TheBuzzSaw]

I hate hate hate the "trap questions". Koreans use trap questions when it comes to food because with Koreans, food = love. They would ask me all the time if I was hungry. If I say yes, they would create extremely large, filling meals! If I say no, they would still create a good sized meal! It reached the point that even if I was genuinely hungry, I would still say no because I knew they would produce the exact amount of food I could handle. Was I lying? Yes, but their response is a lie too. >_>