Just say terrible, insulting things about all characters in Super Smash Bros. Ultimate

[Champion of Hyrule]

Please do not get too carried away, and be a huge jerk. I obviously shouldn’t have to tell anyone what is acceptable, but just apply some common sense.

How is Bayonetta even allowed to be IN an E10+ rated game? Just look at her! Also, just the thought of her having guns on her FEET... what?

Bowser just body slams a lot and it’s annoying. He can do sacrificial moves which are tournament legal? What?

He licks people. Gross, at least Greninja keeps his scarf to himself. Also, how can he fit razor blades, boxing gloves and a hammer in a tiny car? No, it’s not a hammer it’s a whack-a-mole maket. He’s allowed to carry razors but not a hammer?

Captain Falcon is just a racer. He dosen’t have awesome fire punchy powers, and he has stinking abs on his legs.

Cloud carrys a meat cleaver around with him everywhere, that can chop any strangers heads off. Plus, it for some reason looks cool

While I’m on the topic of weird swords, Corrin has a golden mini-chainsaw with pink fire. It’s weird.

Diddy Kong is just a crazy grabber, and if you pause at the right time, you can see that he kisses them. Ew, also if you want to do a battle with no items, you can’t stop him from throwing banana peels.

Why does Donkey Kong not have a move where he throws a barrel? That’s all I have to say.

Dr. Mario is just an example of how weird Smash Bros can get. Plus, he was put into Melee before Wario made it into Brawl

Again, an example of how weird Smash Bros. can get. He’s literally just a duck who flys around getting killed and a dog who laughs at you

If he can get into Smash, why dosen’t any other characters who are in Star Fox get in? Peppy Hare? Slippy, oh wait that’s why. Anyways, Nintendo needs to learn taxonomy.

Fox’s blaster pretty much does NOTHING. And his fire move makes him sound like a gigantic stank. Fox is really overrated and does not deserve to be played Final Destination no items.

Ganondorf has a sword and never uses it. That’s what everyone complains about but then they say there are too many swordfighters. Did he even HAVE a sword on OOT? And at least have ONE move based around his fight with you.

Okay, I think there’s one move where Greninja licks you. Plus, he’s an idiot! Does he know people can pull his tongue? And why is he not Ash Greninja? Why is that not even an
alternate skin?

Oh, Ice Climbers, I hate you. Do you two chumps realize you have spikes on your shoes? Kill people with them, or better yet, step on EACH OTHER. I really hate you, and your stages!

Ike probably got steroids between Brawl and Sm4sh. Why is Yoshi’s tax fraud such a scandal when Ike is on steroids?

Wanna know how to ruin Final Destination? Play as Inkling and get it inky.

Isabelle’s final smash: it’s putting you in a house. What? Okay, I can’t really suggest a better one but at least make it look cool.

No no no no no. Don’t even get me started on the rest move. I only found out what it’s actually supposed to do last week by looking it up, and it’s pretty insulting to call Jigglypuff a balloon Pokémon.

King Dedede’s Hammer dosen’t make stars come out like he does in the game. Plus, he can do a sacrificial move like Bowser

King K. Rool pretty much is only in Smash to get people thinking Banjo Kazooie will be added because he’s from Rare. He’s probably gonna become an assist trophy and if he does the internet will be all over that.

People always spam Kirby’s cut ability and when they do it can get really annoying because I can’t really do it properly against CPUs

Link’s Bomb move does practically nothing and now it can look blue while doing nothing. The ancient arrow also is nowhere nearly as big as that and in the game it obliterates anything, so why can’t it do that? Replace that final smash with Urbosa’s Fury, add Revali’s Gale and make his shield look like Daruk’s protection

Little Mac is just a boxer and as that dosen’t technically have training to run around the whole stage and jump. Got one more complaint: instant KO move

Lucario is really bad and while he does get better if you get more hurt, just... why?

Sorry, won’t write anything until Mother 3 is released in North America. I’ll wait

Luigi defies gravity, making himself a human missle, fights against goddesses and gorillas, yet is still afraid of ghosts.

Mario is an Italian stereotype but we all say it’s okay because he’s an innocent videogame character. Why?

Look at a picture of Marth, and see how ridiculous he looks. Especially on Brawl where his hair goes all the way down to his shoulders

Lucina shouldn’t be an echo fighter. In her game her move set was really different from Marth’s but she’s related to him so she acts just like him

Mega Man’s lemons that he shoots are barely better then Fox, Falco And Wolf’s blaster. He also has a robo-diaper.

Meta Knight is WAY overdramatic and like, a terrible knight

Mewtwo is #150 in the Pokédex and Mew is #151. Just think about that for a minute...

Before in Smash, I could only mercilessly beat the stink out of beloved characters from my childhood. Now I can beat my family!

I would say that his #9 Attack is way too OP, but all of his other attacks are terrible so... I guess it balances out

Ness has a spell called crap. And it makes a green ball of energy. He is also the creepiest character in Melee and dosen’t have an alternate skin where he’s in his pajamas. Please explain.

Olimar has no good moves except for maybe his up smash. That’s not even an exaggeration

Could someone please explain how what originally looked like pizza with a missing slice is now a yellow ball with arms and legs that can throw fire hydrants and fruit?

Palutena is a character who can summon black holes and fight against some of the strongest Swordfighters in all of videogames yet she still makes Pit do all of her work

Princess Peach is just a character who gets kidnapped and we now have proof that she can beat the hell out of Bowser, and every single one of his Koopalings.

Just another character to show how totally un-far fetched adding Waluigi is.

Pichu is a failed attempt to make something cuter then Pikachu.

Pikachu kinda had to be in Smash. But his Lightning is surprisingly slow for lightning. Smash may have mythological creatures, and magic but it makes lightning slower then a fat plumber running?

Pit can’t fly in his games and that’s one of his biggest weaknesses but he can actually go REALLY high in Smash.

Dark Pit can fly in his game and can go just as high as Pit. What!

Can you not just constantly switch between Pokémon all the time so people can’t hit you? Okay you probably can’t but it’s still a good thought

Ridley is actually pretty terrifying for an E10+ game. I mean, what is with his eye, and don’t even look at his rib cage

R.O.B. used to be a kids toy but now he has laser eyes

I’m too lazy to finish

 

[Deleted member]

I hate talking badly about my character tho.

 

[Deleted member]

Well I won't do the whole roster, but I'll give a try;

:How is it that you managed to make it in again? You literally have no personality.

:I have no idea how you managed to stay in Smash for so long. You are the most boring Pokemon in exsitance.

:You're a filler character with nothing to add whatsoever. Next.

:The second most boring, dull, and uninteresting character in Smash next to Jigglypuff.

:Girl, you development in your chest area accurately matches that of your character development; flat. Just flat.

:ultrobin&: These boys are such Mary Sues (or is it Gary Stus?), they make Kirito from Sword Art Online look like Hamlet in comparison. Yeah, I went there.

: Your game sucks. Plain and simple.

: Your game is never getting localized. Might as well face it at this point.

: Why are you here?

: Again, why are you here?

 

[YoshiandToad]

This seems similar to the Roast thread but okay

(remember this is all in jest, and very few of these opinions are ones I actually hold)

Literally the biggest scandal inclusion to date, broken beyond belief and to such an extent even Sakurai had to take note what a mistake he'd made with you.

The Bowsette meme is the most interesting thing you've done for years and it's not even canon. Also despite being a main character in Mario Nintendo still haven't felt it fit to give you your own game. Even Captain Toad and Yoshi managed this. You're less loved by Nintendo than a random civilian with no special abilities and the Mario equivalent to a horse.

So unimportant you couldn't even get your own palettes and were ignore in the original Mario Kart 8 for your seven almost siblings

Isabelle, Villager and Link managed to make it into Mario Kart as racing car drivers over you, the most famous racing car driver character Nintendo has. That's gotta sting. Don't worry though, I'm sure Miyamoto is drawing up plans for a brand new F-Zero as we speak...

Most overrated character in gaming history. Where's your cross dressing alt, Cloud?

Literally who. Managed to almost **** up the huge success Awakening had. Male is absolutely hated for no reason. Female is a fan favourite amongst sad lonely men. I'm informed Corrin has the personality of cardboard.

Like Bayonetta you ended up being a scourge of the Brawl metagame. Pathetically had to be rescued from the villain by his girlfriend and a random toddler she was babysitting. Pitiful.

Constantly upstaged by his sidekick to an embarrassing degree. Probably the worst Final Smash until Ultimate. Pathetically had to be rescued for 2/3 of the original trilogy games making you wonder if DK was really the main star of the series.

Literally Mario in a coat. One of the most ridiculous decisions Sakurai ever made, and even the person who brought him up only wanted him as an alt outfit. Most pointless inclusion on the roster to date.

Annoying laugh, so little moveset potential they had to steal it from other games. Still the best retro pick by far, even if they're one of the most hated characters ever concieved and a random duck. Forget Bandana Waddle Dee, Captain Toad or even Goomba in a hat; these two are the most generic by far.

Fox's whiny baby rival archetype character. A poor man's Fox both in Smash and his own game.

Has a worse 'good game to bad game' ratio than Sonic. Somehow invulnerable to getting cancelled no matter how hard his series pans as Miyamoto constantly shoves Fox and friends in games where they don't really belong; Dinosaur Planet, Project Guard, Starlink...

The Great King of Evil...is still an irrelevant character from a dead series' semi clone. You can jazz him up all you want, but he wasn't considered important enough to make it in on his own merit.

Genuinely still feels like a flavour of the week mon pick. XY didn't really have any stand out mascots, Greninja was merely the least awful of a rather lackluster gen.

Probably the worst NES game I've ever played. That Nintendo keeps trying to charge us money for this game on every console is insulting. Icicle Mountain is probably the worst stage concieved to date too. Did not miss when they were cut from Sm4sh and I'm only disappointed they came back.

Ike's actually fast in his game. None of that here. He was a slower, less mobile, shorter range crappier Cloud last game. But hey, at least both seme and uke fans can have their preference of Ike present in this game.

Couldn't even be bothered to give Inkling a pose so their Amiibos don't look nearly identical.

Isabelle, I'm beginning to think your so called pacifism is a bunch of crap.

Should have been Meowth if they needed an anime pick. There's a reason everyone cuts you from their rosters when given the choice you irrelevant Pokemon choice. Sing has to be one of the most useless moves in the entire game.

Basically target practice with his massive bulk. Also you get possessed by every single mild threat that comes to Popstar...how weak is your will?

If someone asked me to draw a generic fat crocodile with a crown, this would basically be what I'd draw minus the revolting pulsing eyeball and ridiculous belly armour. Your plans make no sense, I honestly didn't miss you in either Returns of Tropical Freeze like I would with Bowser either. Good luck getting back into your own series by the way.

Probably the biggest time sink character on the production. Imagine how many additional characters you could have if Sakurai didn't have to keep porting neutral special abilities to this pink blob? Probably like...2 as of Ultimate.

****s sake, how many more of you do we need?

Literally just a boxer. Japan was right. Captain Toad has better airgame than you in Treasure Tracker even.

Literally the Pokemon substitue for Goku. Has Goku's voice for bonus points as well as well as a Kamehameha Final Smash or a Super form.

If you thought Ness was niche, here comes his Japan exclusive brother in arms Lucas. The only character I didn't bother buying the DLC for last game. Cry some more.

You managed to bring about one of the worst financial years Nintendo has had recently with your dumb Year of Luigi. Also in Smash you're like an alien has come down, skinned the real Luigi and is pretending to be him but doesn't understand how to pass himself off as a normal individual. Your poses, your moves, everything about you feels off.

For christ sake Mario stop being so damn irritated in all your renders and put down the irrelevant powerup you've been carrying around since Brawl.

Blandest fighter on the roster. Despite being the face of the series Marth was upstaged by nearly every other Smash FEer bar the two avatars in the Choose Your Legend polls.

Blandest fighter on the roster but in female flavour. Has popularity amongst the Fire Emblem fanbase, although having played Awakening I have no clue why.

Blandest fighter on the roster but with a hot and spicy flavour. Apparently hated by the Fire Emblem fanbase although still somehow came second in the male catogary of the Choose Your Legend polls. Shroedingers popularity apparently. Has the worst gimmick amongst sword users.

Blandest fighter on the roster but new and improved. Got bitchslapped out of Sm4sh by Sakurai(disguised as Captain Falcon) when he realised Robin was more interesting in every single way.

Has a persistant fanbase who greatly overestimate how important Megaman actually is when they turned and said Pac-Man wasn't as important to video games as he was. Say what you will about the Sonic fanbase, I've never seen them say anything that deluded.

Edgy Kirby. Managed to single handedly ruin Brawl(with a bit of help from Diddy and the Ice Climbers) and is the most famous banned character due to sheer poor game balance and design work.

Ultimate Pokemon...outclassed by Pichu in Melee...and practically everyone else.

Poor man's wooden spoon prize to attempt to make up for their characters being left out for Bayonetta's sake. Actually forget what I said about Kirby, Mii Fighters are probably the biggest dev time sink. No one wanted them, no one liked them upon reveal and they're still viewed with disdain by some of the community who would eat up any character daddy Sakurai dished up for them.

An actual OC.

Whilst Falcon's series may be dead, at least he's less niche than Ness. Not enough moveset ability on his own, Sakurai had to drag abilities from other characters to create a semi interesting character out of him.

Whenever selected with Random, immedietly restart the game. You've lost.

The Grandaddy of video games still isn't capable of having enough moveset potential to have a moveset that hasn't been stitched together with weak Pac-Man connections. The only thing worse that's happened to showcase Pac-Man in a poor light is Pixels.

Sakurai developed this character himself and still couldn't put together a coherehant moveset or gimmick for her seeing how Miis had the whole Custom Moves thing covered. Easily the most disappointing inclusion to date.

Stop abusing the few subjects you have left that are loyal to you, start picking up some stuff from your only solo adventure and free my most wanted already from your clawing useless grasp already.

AND YOU CAN PUT HIM DOWN TOO. Daisy, you literally have so little to yourself you have to borrow Peach's own civilians to play her shadow. You have no established subjects to even put in Toads place. Useless. Also Waluigi will always be more popular.

Pichu is an attempt to market a crappier version of an already lackluster Pokemon by upping the cuteness factor. Basically faded from importance at this point showing just how fleeting Pokemon choices are.

An absolute lackluster Pokemon who you cannot get away from no matter where you look.

Uprising isn't nearly as amusing as it thinks it is. Somehow managed to make me go from remembering Kid Icarus fondly as a kid to wanting to kick it into a fire pit. Pun intended.

The above but edgier. The least worthwhile echo to date. At least Dark Pit doesn't quip every ten seconds to the point I want to punch him in the face. That puts him above every other Kid Icarus character bar Medusa.

The grass type has the best anti air game despite grass being weak to flying types, the flying type falls the fastest and has the worst jumps despite having wings and the turtle is the most mobile of the three. Not a single one of these frigging monsters makes sense. Oh, and Ivysaur is the unloved I guess.

He's in! What's his big debut? Getting his ass handed to him by Bayonetta. IS THIS WHAT YOU WAITED FOR SMASH FANS? WAS IT WORTH THE WAIT?

Not a gaming character. Not even a character. Another generic that speculators like to pretend isn't generic.

:ultrobin Robin why are you a slow sack of useless with a deliberating gimmick? You were fast in your own game, but can't fault you for your commitment to bringing Fire Emblem gameplay pieces to Smash...I just question whether the turn based combat is a good one to translate to a fighting game.

A glorified taxi driver in her debut game, fast tracked to try and become the latest Nintendo darling. Almost immedietly forgotten about in Odyssey in favour of Pauline. Also child abuser.

Is Ryu contractually obliged to crossover with every single fighting game character or something? He gets whored out more than any other character I can think of.

Genuinely awful. Weak for some reason, pretty slow...why are you stronger OUTSIDE your armour?

Gosh we really are deseprate for echoes aren't we?

A literally pointless NPC turned into an OC that doesn't even do the one ****ing thing from the game she's in. Where's your harp Miss Generic Ninja?

Has vision about his friend dying. Doesn't attempt to stop it happening by mentioning it. Then steals his catchphrase for Smash. What a ****.

He-Man finally makes his appearence in Smash. Neat.

The only character to date I've never seen predicted that's an ACTUAL character(looking at you ROB, G+W and Wii Fit Trainer). Richter's one of the most "who" characters yet.

Money is stronger than friendship I see.

An absolute dumpster fire of a fanbase even by Smash standards. Pick a game from the Sonic series. It's probably trash. No worries, we'll just add another Hedgehog OC like we're DeviantArt to attempt to revive Sonic's franchise for the umpteenth time and instantly forget what makes the game work when we accidentally stumble across a formula for success.

Did we really need three of you?

Now Isabelle's here, what's the point in you? Everyone loves her and you're not even the face of your series...

Game and Wario alone makes me feel bad for you. Wario proves time and time again that even something as simple as Warioware can be ruined when you forget the formula that works.

Not a single person asked for you, not a single person would request you, I'm not really sure how many would even miss you.

Fox's gruff edgy rival. A character everyone complained about taking the last spot in Brawl then complained when he got cut in Sm4sh and became the most wanted character in Ultimate. Proof the fanbase truly doesn't know what the **** it wants.

A glorified powerup with one single game that is universally seen as good.

SERIOUSLY. DID WE REALLY NEED THREE OF THESE?

Infinite magic and psychic powers...becomes better every single time she cosplays as a ****ing ninja.

Most your fanbase are perverts. I mean most of all the characters fanbase are perverts, but you definitely get hit hardest.

phew that took a while. Hopefully I insulted everyone. Ran out of steam somewhere near the latter half's middle but just know if I didn't insult your favourite enough, your main is literally the worst character every invented and needs to be cut by next game to make way for the real characters like Bowsette and Samurai Goroh.

 

[Kevandre]

- I hate you and wish you were never thrown into Smash Bros via a lie about popularity
- I like the new improved version of you better from Twitter...
- Up until I saw you in that clown car, I never wanted to see you in Smash
- You are only memorable due to Smash Bros
- Winner of the most overrated game award
- I hate male Corrin's design, and your role in Revelation was shallow. I'm stretching here, I love Corrin
- Ah, the one you had to use in DKC2 when Dixie died.
- Ah, the one you had to use in DKC1 when Diddy died.
- Your games are a far more boring version of tetris and even as a kid I questioned your inclusion in Melee
- Your game only sold well because it was sharing a cartridge with Mario and was a pack-in.. Would have been a flop otherwise.
- You got more unique in Brawl and 4 but simultaneously got less fun to play as
- Your voice acting is bad and you should feel bad
- You wish you were as cool as Hyrule Warriors Ganondorf. In both design and moveset
- You're only my... 7th? Favorite starter Pokemon?
- People only wanted you in because you were there before
- Your game is too hard and too expensive and most the characters in it have bad designs
- Splatoon is like okay. Saved by the music and waifu sisters/Marina
- Sorry Isabelle, I can't insult you. you are too pure for this world
- Meh? Probably should have never been in Smash
- Your name always reminds me of Carlos Mencia and that's the worst thing I can say here
- I wish you were fully voice acted, instead you just have generic sounds and that sucks
- Your spinoffs are much better than your main games
- Breath of the Wild was not that great
- I'd rather have Mike Tyson
- Same as Jigglypuff. I never understood why Game Freak pushed Lucario so hard when he was such a non-entity but here he is. Forgettable
- I wish I liked your game. Story/music is dope but the gameplay... no thank you
- Your constant ice physics in games sucks
- You had no outstanding games in the years between Sunshine and Odyssey. Galaxy is good but not as good.
- I always hated you once you came back to Brawl but your far superior clone didn't. you jerk
- I like Alexis Tipton but she's no Laura Bailey. You gotta bring Laura back fam
- I don't care for your games... at all
- Your brokenness in Brawl is overstated
- Ugliest cat I've ever seen
- Couldn't care about you outside of Tomodachi Life
- I... got nothin
- Same as Lucas. I want to like your game but can't do it
- I hated your game when I got it with my Gamecube. Pikmin dying was too sad
- I never wanted you in Smash. Still don't, really
- Bring back Ali Hillis
- Not as hot as Bowsette
- HI I'M DAISY
- The Pichu Bros were stupid anime characters
- As much as I love Pokemon, I'm sick of your face. Let other people have a turn
- Didn't know who you were when you were announced for Brawl
- Maybe tries too hard? I really love Dark Pit in Uprising tho
- You accidentally brought along Squirtle and that traitor Charizard.
- Too small for smash
- Your Brawl Final Smash was vastly superior
:ultrobin - I've said it before, it's "TIME to tip the scales" not "Let's Tip the Scales"
- I hate fighting you
- Uhh. I love you. But... maybe your game was bad? Kind of? I'd really like an Awakening-style remake combining it and Eliwood's game with the two generations... Oh. Crap. I don't have anything bad to say.
- Your Final Smash should have been High Noon
- I don't think Street Fighter is as iconic as other people do so your inclusion felt blegh
- No Metroid game is the best in the Metroidvania genre.
- You could have had a lot more potential
- I liked you a lot better in Melee
- Why you gotta steal Reyn's lines man
- No Castlevania game is the best in the Metroidvania genre.
- You join the ranks of Pit as being the second character I didn't know at announcement
- You feel just super out of place in the roster
- I wish your moves were taken from Sonic Adventure 2 instead, your one phenomenal game
- You could use more differences from regular Link
- You should have let Isabelle be mayor
- None of your games have resonated with me
- The best part of Wii Fit had nothing to do with you. Jogging on Wuhu Island with other Miis was way better
- I feel like everyone mained you for a month in Brawl and then never spoke of you again
- You've only got two games truly worth playing
- Waste of potential. Masked Link would have been so much more itneresting
- You aren't and that makes me really sad.
- You are irritating to fight and I thoroughly disliked your part of Zero Mission

 

[thirsty-pocket]

I actually do like most of these characters... but i'm not going to lie there are a few in there that I super don't.

Spoiler

The ballot was rigged and nobody actually wanted you.
Congratulations for trending worldwide, too bad it's because of a creepy transformation/bimbofication fetish meme.
Remember when everybody couldn't stand you because you were a baby bowser ripoff that everyone thought was replacing the fan favorite Koopalings? I sure do. I still think you're unnecessary character.
How's life outside of Smash?
You didn't deserve to be in Smash.
You're just a glorified commercial.
Ummm... Haha, couldn't get in sooner huh?
Remember how Miyamoto called you Donkey because he thought it meant stupid?
You seriously don't need to be anything other than a costume.
Bad dog! Bad! *shakes newspaper*
You were such a deadbeat in Adventures. "oh im so cool, i'll wander off on my own. But once you guys get some money i'll join you again"
You were a complete whiney baby in Adventures... almost uncharacteristically so.
Your new backstory is trash. I can't believe you're not even the master of your own destiny.
You sound like Stitch.
Your game is awful.
I don't know you and I don't care to know you.
You are the opressors, Octarians did nothing wrong.
You lowered my expectations and your reveal trailer was dull. Bad dog! Bad dog! *shakes newspaper*
You are a joke character and not even that popular anymore, you're the only "original 12" character most people would be okay with cutting.
Heck, I don't think I can do it, he's perfect...
You look dumb now that your tail is gone ( though it appears to be back in Smash, albeit so tiny it's almost invisible )
Dumb idiot, ruined all of Dedede's work protecting the fountain of dreams. Nice going.
Nice job dying.
I bet you've got cheeseburgers in those gloves have ya Mac?
You're furbait and it's honestly ruined my image of you.
...It's no good. I can't do it.
Your fans are too sensitive, just like you.
You're also pretty deep in the mud with Bowser right now.
Nobody cared who you were till you were put into Smash.
We didn't need you in Smash.
Captain N.
What the heck is your problem?
Haha, you've been outclassed by a ton of pokemon.
Uhh, a lot of people hate you for some reason I guess.
Dumb idiot didn't know the difference between right and wrong in SSE
EATS BURGERS FROM THE TRASH
How do you keep getting stranded on alien planets??? Seems like a bad look for a delivery boy.
"oh no, i'm a meme...."
The things the internet has done to you... I miss when you were kind of obscure.
See: Bowser
You're as redundant as Waluigi tbh.
Joke character. You don't even need me to say anything.
Everyone likes Eevee better than you. Pssst, i don't, I hate eevee
Your new game is a better Star Fox game than it is a sequel to your own games.
I hate everything about you. Not only should you have stayed an alt in Smash, but you should have died in Uprising.
Couldn't even get a full team, huh? Nice.
Hey man, what you did was pretty messed up.
Marketing gimmick. Nobody actually enjoys you for your intended purpose.
:ultrobin Don't know you, don't care to.
What a great character she was in Galaxy... Too bad her purpose was disregarded and her status cheapened by all her subsequent appearances. "Every 100 years" my butt.
I hear people who are fans of your series don't even like you.
I don't care about you.
I don't know you enough to have an insult prepared.
Maybe if you didn't hand over the infant Metroid to a science vessel to be experimented on, you wouldn't be mourning it.
I found you... faker!
Maybe you could have been just a little more helpful to Link than to just teach him fast travel songs?
Sorry kid, don't know you apart from "I'm really feeling it"
It must be hard knowing that all your work to destroy Dracula is for nothing since he comes back after you're dead.
A little girl is more powerful than you.
You're old now.
Robotnik somehow always outruns you even on foot. You're too slow.
Um.... Boy people sure didn't like the way you looked at first, huh?
Tom Nook was more requested than you were.
Haha you wore a toilet on your head.
NOBODY wanted you.
You looked better in Assault and Brawl.
Your modern design is atrocious and you went from my fave character to one of pure indifference after Yoshi Story.
Nice job leading Ganondorf to the sacred realm there. You really donked it big time.
Congrats on being the only Zelda that needed saving twice in the same game.
You looked better in Super Metroid.

 

[Gunla]

Threads like these tend to border on spam/are prone to trolling or flaming, so I'm going to close it.