Link to original post: [drupal=4343]Growing Up[/drupal]
Well, I've been 18 for about a month and seven days now. That's still sinking in. Classes stopped for seniors over a week ago, and now we're on our 'senior project'. I'm shadowing the American Greetings card company HQ in their new product development division.
It's weird not being in school everyday. It's weird dealing with adults instead of my insane peers. It's weird being in the 'real world' instead of what we called the 'Magnifibubble', or the little bubble that was my high school.
It's weird how much I've changed.
I used to be so much more annoying and afraid and just plain stupid. I was angsty and afraid of everyone and shy and quiet. I had no confidence and I was awful at drawing. I was bullied, ignored, and weird. I hated people.
Anime used to define my life. I used to watch Naruto. What the heck? No offense to anyone who likes Naruto or anything...I just can't stand that show. I used to only be able to draw anime. Everything in my life was 'so kawaii desuuuuu'. And boy did I want to learn Japanese....Okay, it wasn't THAT bad...but you get the point. My fashion sense was weirder. Less organized and neat than it should have been.
It's scary looking back. Frankly, that me annoys the current me. What the heck was wrong with me? Pre-teens/'New' teens are weird.
It's funny how the music I'm listening to kind of fits my mood and this blog. It's even funnier how it's Yellowcard and that means super nostalgia from those days.
I'm 18. I said that, but that is just what I am right now. I'm an artist...but I'm serious now. Serious enough to get a good sum of money from a contest for my future college. In August, I'm leaving NEOH to study Game Art & Design at Art Institute of Pittsburgh...sweet city, but I hate every sports team there minus the Pirates. I have someone I love. They're moving to Detroit for college...but Skype is pretty cool. And so are sporadic visits. I still like anime and draw anime, just not as much. My art style has become more my own. It has aspects of anime, realistic, and cartooning. I've mellowed out a ton. I really really like people. I'm pretty outgoing now and I am pretty confident (in both personality). Im comfortable in my own skin.
I don't know why I felt like writing it...but I guess it's because my life is changing so much at once. I'm an adult now. I don't feel any different. I just feel like me. 18 is just a number really. I don't know.
I thought I'd be more afraid. I guess I might be ready for moving on from this chapter of my life to the world of college.
I'll be truly on my own for the first time in my life.
And that's where I start getting scared haha
I've always been afraid of growing up. Time to get over that fear.
Sorry about this little vent of words. When I speak my mind, I honestly have no true purpose of my writings. It makes no sense and I ramble, but it helps me to vent. Well, time to take on the world I guess.
-- Alyssa "Lokii"
PS I was gonna draw a sweet picture for this, then there was a tornado warning so I hid in the basement for a while.
Well, I've been 18 for about a month and seven days now. That's still sinking in. Classes stopped for seniors over a week ago, and now we're on our 'senior project'. I'm shadowing the American Greetings card company HQ in their new product development division.
It's weird not being in school everyday. It's weird dealing with adults instead of my insane peers. It's weird being in the 'real world' instead of what we called the 'Magnifibubble', or the little bubble that was my high school.
It's weird how much I've changed.
I used to be so much more annoying and afraid and just plain stupid. I was angsty and afraid of everyone and shy and quiet. I had no confidence and I was awful at drawing. I was bullied, ignored, and weird. I hated people.
Anime used to define my life. I used to watch Naruto. What the heck? No offense to anyone who likes Naruto or anything...I just can't stand that show. I used to only be able to draw anime. Everything in my life was 'so kawaii desuuuuu'. And boy did I want to learn Japanese....Okay, it wasn't THAT bad...but you get the point. My fashion sense was weirder. Less organized and neat than it should have been.
It's scary looking back. Frankly, that me annoys the current me. What the heck was wrong with me? Pre-teens/'New' teens are weird.
It's funny how the music I'm listening to kind of fits my mood and this blog. It's even funnier how it's Yellowcard and that means super nostalgia from those days.
I'm 18. I said that, but that is just what I am right now. I'm an artist...but I'm serious now. Serious enough to get a good sum of money from a contest for my future college. In August, I'm leaving NEOH to study Game Art & Design at Art Institute of Pittsburgh...sweet city, but I hate every sports team there minus the Pirates. I have someone I love. They're moving to Detroit for college...but Skype is pretty cool. And so are sporadic visits. I still like anime and draw anime, just not as much. My art style has become more my own. It has aspects of anime, realistic, and cartooning. I've mellowed out a ton. I really really like people. I'm pretty outgoing now and I am pretty confident (in both personality). Im comfortable in my own skin.
I don't know why I felt like writing it...but I guess it's because my life is changing so much at once. I'm an adult now. I don't feel any different. I just feel like me. 18 is just a number really. I don't know.
I thought I'd be more afraid. I guess I might be ready for moving on from this chapter of my life to the world of college.
I'll be truly on my own for the first time in my life.
And that's where I start getting scared haha
I've always been afraid of growing up. Time to get over that fear.
Sorry about this little vent of words. When I speak my mind, I honestly have no true purpose of my writings. It makes no sense and I ramble, but it helps me to vent. Well, time to take on the world I guess.
-- Alyssa "Lokii"
PS I was gonna draw a sweet picture for this, then there was a tornado warning so I hid in the basement for a while.
