Grade 11 English Homework: 33%

[simplicityho]

This project earned me a 1/3

I"ll put this bluntly.

You smeared the whole thing with melodrama and verbosity. I get the feeling you're trying to be poetic, but with no actual substance.

Wait.
I just read the end.
Never mind.

 

[Dr. James Rustles]

Wow. That was just awesome.

Falcon Punches, brothers!

 

[Orangepeel]

The ending was perfect. The lack of a period or exclamation point (LOP - Lack of Punctuation, as I call it) when you wrote "FALCON KICK" made for a hilariously abrupt ending.

 

[Deci]

It was awesome, I lol'd

You're pretty good at describing things, but like someone else said earlier, you're writing more for yourself than for your target audience. Why was the assignment out of a total of 3? A mark lost with such a low total would be a big hit on the final percentage.

I guess your teacher isn't great in the humour department xD The teacher will likely give you a higher mark if she favours you over others. I've written simply ******** stuff for various classes and got 90%+. Sometimes it's all about getting on the teacher's "good side". I know it's a bad thing for teachers to be biased, but it's inevitable. Especially with English, where most of the marks come from the teacher's opinion, rather than something like Math that has a specific answer that's set in stone.

I don't know the specifics of the assignment, but I would've given you a 70% ^^

 

[Slice n Dice]

I enjoyed it. I can't imagine what you're teacher was thinking when they saw"Falcon Punch"

 

[Wikipedia]

You guys have to remember, Eric doesn't play melee and he is an English major. Kiki, that was unprofessional to scold your mods in front of the common member >

Now we know they aren't perfect.

 

[McDandelion]

Falcon Kick!

 

[redgreenblue]

Hello.

Though I do not share your opinion of this strange character "Captain Falcon", I find this story highly amusing and I commend you, RGB, for writing it.

Hahaha, oh wow, I did not think I would see this thread again.

I"ll put this bluntly.

You smeared the whole thing with melodrama and verbosity. I get the feeling you're trying to be poetic, but with no actual substance.

Wait.
I just read the end.
Never mind.

I find that increasing the verbosity of a story without a point to be a very intelligent form of humour. Pointlessness is beautiful.

The ending was perfect. The lack of a period or exclamation point (LOP - Lack of Punctuation, as I call it) when you wrote "FALCON KICK" made for a hilariously abrupt ending.

I was actually thinking of not even including the ending quote.

It was awesome, I lol'd

You're pretty good at describing things, but like someone else said earlier, you're writing more for yourself than for your target audience. Why was the assignment out of a total of 3? A mark lost with such a low total would be a big hit on the final percentage.

I guess your teacher isn't great in the humour department xD The teacher will likely give you a higher mark if she favours you over others. I've written simply ******** stuff for various classes and got 90%+. Sometimes it's all about getting on the teacher's "good side". I know it's a bad thing for teachers to be biased, but it's inevitable. Especially with English, where most of the marks come from the teacher's opinion, rather than something like Math that has a specific answer that's set in stone.

I don't know the specifics of the assignment, but I would've given you a 70% ^^

The specifications were: "Write an alternate ending".

I enjoyed it. I can't imagine what you're teacher was thinking when they saw"Falcon Punch"

I can't find the physical copy of the assignment, but it was something along the lines of "Uh... what? Quite a switcheroo!".

 

[MattDotZeb]

I actually read that story, too.
I lol'd

 

[redgreenblue]

I actually read that story, too.
I lol'd

Boys and Girls? Seriously?

 

[fireb0rn]

..................

 

[KOdEx]

I enjoyed your story very much. And to think your teacher only gave you a 33?1?! What more could you ask for??

NEWCOMER: CHUCK NORRIS
^
I'm kidding...

 

[sakuraZaKi]

...

metroid's is better.

(Don't take this the wrong way) xD

Seriously, I lol'ed. falcon as a soul mate? *snickers*

 

[Mike87]

The story was OK but I give you props for coming up with a unique idea