AARP: Another Amazing Roleplay

[The Black Omen]

No affiliation with any other AARPs out there.

RULES:
1. SmashBoards forum rules reign supreme
2. Don't be "that guy"
3. Join at your leisure; there are no prerequisites for participation!
4. Use whatever format you like, whether that be quotation marks, colons, or both.
5. Don't hesitate to roleplay as whatever characters you can imagine!
6. No godmodding, metagaming, powerplaying, or any other nerdy terms frowned upon in RP threads.

It is the first summer after the end of the Mii Wars, a series of conflicts in which a selectively-evolved clone army attempted to subvert the balance of nature. Ultimately, the Miis were repelled and presumably destroyed, at a great cost.

In the hopes of restoring order to an unhinged cosmos, the victorious powers imposed a "soft reboot" on the universe (basically a really big defibrillator), making this lore almost completely irrelevant.

Almost.

There've been almost no customers at SmashBurger today. Taking advantage of the situation, the fiery young burger-flipper Roy (from Fire Emblem) has left work early, leaving the recently-hired cashier Roy (from Mario Brothers) as the sole employee present at the establishment. The spiny bald pink-and-yellow turtle lad soon grows bored.

Let's see how long this lasts.

 

[PeppyPaisano]

Let's shall!

"....was overreacting, she-a only had a light fever..."
* Finally, a potential customer! The establishment's front door opens to reveal the definitely legitimate doctor, Mario (Super Mario/Dr. Mario), who looked like he hadn't slept in 3 days. The poor guy lets out a small yawn before walking up to the Koopa cashier at the counter...*

 

[Janx_uwu]

"Welcome to Smashburger, where we satisfy your every request. Want a Final Smashburger to three-stock your hunger pangs?"

Roy had never actually worked the grill before, but he was sure excited to give it a shot!

 

[The Black Omen]

The door opened again, as five rather short creatures entered the establishment. Holding the door open for his family was Knuckle Joe, longtime Assist Trophy and former minion of King Dedede. He was thanked by his wife, Knuckle Jess, who was followed by their three children, Knuckles Jordan (9), Jason (8), and Janus (6). Any fast-food worker with any wits would be horrified. It was going to be a very tall order.

KNUCKLE JOE: You getting the usual?

KNUCKLE JESS: Yeah. What about you?

KNUCKLE JOE: I dunno. I think I'm getting too old for the Cruel Smash...

Knuckle Joe turned to his kids, who were even shorter than he was.

KNUCKLE JOE: What are you all getting?

KNUCKLE JASON: Can I get a OreoTM Smash-shake?

KNUCKLE JOE: Sure, a small one, but what about food?

KNUCKLE JASON: Uhhhhh... onion rings?

KNUCKLE JESS: Are we eating in?

KNUCKLE JOE: Not if it still costs extra...

KNUCKLE JESS: It would be nice to sit down for a little while.

KNUCKLE JOE: Yeah, but, y'know...

Knuckle Joe gave Knuckle Jess that look that said all the things that he couldn't let the kids hear.

KNUCKLE JESS: It's okay, Joseph.

The kids weren't stupid. They knew their parents weren't telling them something.

KNUCKLE JORDAN: What's going on?

KNUCKLE JESS: Nothing.

KNUCKLE JOE: I- I just don't like eating in, that's all.

Knuckle Joe ruffled Jordan's hair, which he only did when he was trying to lighten the mood and distract the kids from the secret struggles of the adult world.

KNUCKLE JOE: How about we sit down at the tables outside?

Knuckle Joe looked up at Knuckle Jess, who seemed proud of her husband. The family patiently waited behind Mario.

 

[PeppyPaisano]

"Hm... sure, why not? Gimme one-a those Final Smashburger meals, hold-a the pickle and onions... oh, and-a one Super Salad to go with it." Mario ordered, stuffing his hands into his coat pockets. "Wii Fit would-a... yaaaawn..! ...kill me if I didn't get one a' those."

 

[The Black Omen]

"Hm... sure, why not? Gimme one-a those Final Smashburger meals, hold-a the pickle and onions... oh, and-a one Super Salad to go with it." Mario ordered, stuffing his hands into his coat pockets. "Wii Fit would-a... yaaaawn..! ...kill me if I didn't get one a' those."

Knuckle Joe recognize the voice, and tapped Mario on the shoulder.

KNUCKLE JOE: Hey... do I know you from somewhere?

 

[PeppyPaisano]

Mario would turn around to see Knuckle Joe & his large family standing behind him as he ordered. "Eh? Sorry, I-a don't do autographs anymore." He says, as if everyone in the room knew his identity.

 

[The Black Omen]

Mario would turn around to see Knuckle Joe & his large family standing behind him as he ordered. "Eh? Sorry, I-a don't do autographs anymore." He says, as if everyone in the room knew his identity.

KNUCKLE JOE: Oh, that's, uh, fine, I guess...

Knuckle Joe backed away awkwardly, deciding not to continue the interaction. He whispered something to his wife, before pulling out his phone and Googling, "Who's that one guy with the Italian accent?"

But Knuckle Joe couldn't get a connection. That was strange, since SmashBurger usually has good, if somewhat unclean, free guest WiFi. He could connect to neither WiFi nor mobile data. His brow furrowed. How could this be?

He would soon have his answer.

With a blinding flash, the shriveled remains of a meteor smashed through the ceiling, sending a powerful shockwave that shattered most of the windows. The meteor settled in a small crater in the floor, embedded in the now-exposed soil. When the smoke cleared, everyone could see that the object was glowing...