Harry Megamix
Smash Apprentice
Almost everyone at SWF has a list of who they want to see in Super Smash Bros. Brawl. Some of them are good and sensible choices. Some of them are characters who actually embody the essence of the franchise they are representing. Some of them truly deserve to be in Brawl.
Sadly, however, most of them don't. Most of people's choices are just plain stupid, and look that way to any sensible person. Throughout this post, I'm going to list some of the most ridiculously pursuited choices for Brawl, and show why they should get utterly rejected.
Brawl Character Wanted List:
1. Geno
This character probably has the biggest and most fanatical cult following at SWF, save the Ridley club. What makes him so fascinating to fans? He has no distinguishing characteristics (besides that he's a doll--whoopee), and has basically no personality. Any and all movesets made for him involve beams in some way, and that's what most of them solely are--beams.
Geno was an important character to the two games he was in. 2 GAMES. But is he really important to the Nintendo franchise? Before everyone starts the "Pit" argument on me, I'll nip that one in the bud, too. Someone says, "But Pit was only in a few games, and he's not important to Nintendo's franchise!"
True, but refer to my first argument. Geno isn't an exciting choice for Brawl. The only reason he's even really considered by Sakurai is because of the ridiculously large amount of Japanese people who voted for him on the polls. On top of all of this, his annoyingly fanatical and persistent fanbase are enough to make any sane Smasher hate him.
Geno NOT 4 Brawl.
2. Waluigi
Waluigi has, BY FAR, the most annoying and LULZ-creating fanclub out of all the "wanted" characters. King of the Filler Characters, Waluigi is loved by many people in and out of SWF. Why, you ask? I sure as hell don't know.
Just try going into one of the Waluigi threads here. You'll get pummeled with an assortment of movesets for him that involve moves from the Mario Sports games (how that ties into Braw, I have no idea), and the various Mario Party games. It seems like people only want Waluigi in because he's.....Waluigi (which doesn't make sense, but okay), and not for his moveset, or potential as a fighter. He is deservedly the "wanted" character punching bag. "He can throw bombs.....or something," is a good analysis of what would happen if Waluigi was inserted--no, FORCED down the throat of Brawl. It would surely die.
Waluigi, unlike Geno, is NOT important to his franchise. In fact, he's the epitome of franchise NON-IMPORTANCE. The King of Fillers. Waluigi was created solely for the fact that Wario needed a "Luigi". He doesn't play an important, or even semi-important role in any of his games (which are pretty much confined to Mario spinoffs, like the Kart games, or the Sports games). He doesn't even have any distinguishing characteristics, besides his appearance and relatively bland personality.
The World: 1. Waluigi: 0.
3. Lucario/Gardevoir
This is one I decided to merge into one because the points against them are, for the most part, interconnected, and can be applied to either one.
Don't we already have enough Pokemon reps? Apparently not. MOAR, MOAR, MOAR! scream the legions of Pokemon fans who want him in Brawl. We can only hope they don't get what they want.
Lucario is the first of a myriad of nth-generation hopefuls who shouldn't make it into Brawl. Sakurai should've learned that after the Pichu fiasco.
Lucario, if put into Brawl, would most likely become a Mewtwo 2.0. From all the movesets Lucario fanboys have made up, he has relatively similar moves to Mewtwo. Aren't we trying to put the era of Melee clones behind us, folds? We don't need a Mewtwo 2.0. We need Mewtwo, and perhaps Jigglypuff, to come back. We already have Pokemon Trainer, and after he was announced, my apetite for MOAR Pokemon reps was far beyond whetted.
Lucario is important to his franchise, you say? Yes--but, again, do we need more Pokemon? Pikachu came back, big surprise. I say Mewtwo deserves to come back. Lucario, the character, just seems like a sad rehash of Mewtwo. But one that can talk, and that looks like he's wearing clown pants.
Gardevoir, on the other hand, is NOT important to her franchise. Heck, she wasn't even important to her generation. She's relatively uknown to anyone who doesn't play Pokemon games, and even to some who do. The only thing she has going for her is that she's a Pscychic type, which shows up in her movesets. Relentless (and sometimes freaky in their admiration of Gardevoir) fanboys argue that a psychic character would be a good addition.
What's that you say? Mewtwo and Ness are psychic? Oh. Okay then. Another argument for Gardevoir being in Brawl is that she's beautiful. Yes, beautufil. Sorry, fanboys, but Brawl isn't a beauty contest--it's a fighting game. You'd think that Pokemon fans would at least try for an actual FIGHTING Pokemon. But no--the selections get weirder and weirder.
4. Captain Olimar
....and indeed they do get worse. Captain Olimar? From Pikmin? Isn't he, like, two inches tall? Yes, he is.
But Olimar fanboys like to counter this with the famous "size proportion" argument. Basically, somebody says "X character is too big/small for Brawl." They counter with the fact that Pikachu, Kirby, Bowser, etc. are not their normal sizes in the Smash games. But come on. Olimar is TWO INCHES TALL.
His movesets are the worst. They're fairly bland and unimaginative, and mostly revolve around throwing Pikmin, or something like that. Some even suggest an Ice-Climber-esque setup that involves both Olimar and Louie.
*GAG*
5. Petey Piranha
Wow. Just wow. Now we're just scraping the bottom of the barrel. Does this character even deserve an argument about why he shouldn't be in Brawl?
Like great Waluigi before him, Petey Piranha is a prime example of a filler character. Do some people think that just because a character has been in a handful of games (again: the Mario Sports titles mainly, and some other Mario spinoffs), that he's automatically labeled important? Do YOU think that Petey Piranha is worthy enough to represent the Mario franchise? Those are some pretty big shoes to fill.
I've only seen a few of Petey's potential movesets, and I must say, they're about as lackluster as his fanboys' arguments.
[/rant]
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Well, now that I'm done, feel free to discuss, argue and flame me (which is what a good number of you will probably end up doing).
-H. Megamix
Sadly, however, most of them don't. Most of people's choices are just plain stupid, and look that way to any sensible person. Throughout this post, I'm going to list some of the most ridiculously pursuited choices for Brawl, and show why they should get utterly rejected.
Brawl Character Wanted List:
1. Geno
This character probably has the biggest and most fanatical cult following at SWF, save the Ridley club. What makes him so fascinating to fans? He has no distinguishing characteristics (besides that he's a doll--whoopee), and has basically no personality. Any and all movesets made for him involve beams in some way, and that's what most of them solely are--beams.
Geno was an important character to the two games he was in. 2 GAMES. But is he really important to the Nintendo franchise? Before everyone starts the "Pit" argument on me, I'll nip that one in the bud, too. Someone says, "But Pit was only in a few games, and he's not important to Nintendo's franchise!"
True, but refer to my first argument. Geno isn't an exciting choice for Brawl. The only reason he's even really considered by Sakurai is because of the ridiculously large amount of Japanese people who voted for him on the polls. On top of all of this, his annoyingly fanatical and persistent fanbase are enough to make any sane Smasher hate him.
Geno NOT 4 Brawl.
2. Waluigi
Waluigi has, BY FAR, the most annoying and LULZ-creating fanclub out of all the "wanted" characters. King of the Filler Characters, Waluigi is loved by many people in and out of SWF. Why, you ask? I sure as hell don't know.
Just try going into one of the Waluigi threads here. You'll get pummeled with an assortment of movesets for him that involve moves from the Mario Sports games (how that ties into Braw, I have no idea), and the various Mario Party games. It seems like people only want Waluigi in because he's.....Waluigi (which doesn't make sense, but okay), and not for his moveset, or potential as a fighter. He is deservedly the "wanted" character punching bag. "He can throw bombs.....or something," is a good analysis of what would happen if Waluigi was inserted--no, FORCED down the throat of Brawl. It would surely die.
Waluigi, unlike Geno, is NOT important to his franchise. In fact, he's the epitome of franchise NON-IMPORTANCE. The King of Fillers. Waluigi was created solely for the fact that Wario needed a "Luigi". He doesn't play an important, or even semi-important role in any of his games (which are pretty much confined to Mario spinoffs, like the Kart games, or the Sports games). He doesn't even have any distinguishing characteristics, besides his appearance and relatively bland personality.
The World: 1. Waluigi: 0.
3. Lucario/Gardevoir
This is one I decided to merge into one because the points against them are, for the most part, interconnected, and can be applied to either one.
Don't we already have enough Pokemon reps? Apparently not. MOAR, MOAR, MOAR! scream the legions of Pokemon fans who want him in Brawl. We can only hope they don't get what they want.
Lucario is the first of a myriad of nth-generation hopefuls who shouldn't make it into Brawl. Sakurai should've learned that after the Pichu fiasco.
Lucario, if put into Brawl, would most likely become a Mewtwo 2.0. From all the movesets Lucario fanboys have made up, he has relatively similar moves to Mewtwo. Aren't we trying to put the era of Melee clones behind us, folds? We don't need a Mewtwo 2.0. We need Mewtwo, and perhaps Jigglypuff, to come back. We already have Pokemon Trainer, and after he was announced, my apetite for MOAR Pokemon reps was far beyond whetted.
Lucario is important to his franchise, you say? Yes--but, again, do we need more Pokemon? Pikachu came back, big surprise. I say Mewtwo deserves to come back. Lucario, the character, just seems like a sad rehash of Mewtwo. But one that can talk, and that looks like he's wearing clown pants.
Gardevoir, on the other hand, is NOT important to her franchise. Heck, she wasn't even important to her generation. She's relatively uknown to anyone who doesn't play Pokemon games, and even to some who do. The only thing she has going for her is that she's a Pscychic type, which shows up in her movesets. Relentless (and sometimes freaky in their admiration of Gardevoir) fanboys argue that a psychic character would be a good addition.
What's that you say? Mewtwo and Ness are psychic? Oh. Okay then. Another argument for Gardevoir being in Brawl is that she's beautiful. Yes, beautufil. Sorry, fanboys, but Brawl isn't a beauty contest--it's a fighting game. You'd think that Pokemon fans would at least try for an actual FIGHTING Pokemon. But no--the selections get weirder and weirder.
4. Captain Olimar
....and indeed they do get worse. Captain Olimar? From Pikmin? Isn't he, like, two inches tall? Yes, he is.
But Olimar fanboys like to counter this with the famous "size proportion" argument. Basically, somebody says "X character is too big/small for Brawl." They counter with the fact that Pikachu, Kirby, Bowser, etc. are not their normal sizes in the Smash games. But come on. Olimar is TWO INCHES TALL.
His movesets are the worst. They're fairly bland and unimaginative, and mostly revolve around throwing Pikmin, or something like that. Some even suggest an Ice-Climber-esque setup that involves both Olimar and Louie.
*GAG*
5. Petey Piranha
Wow. Just wow. Now we're just scraping the bottom of the barrel. Does this character even deserve an argument about why he shouldn't be in Brawl?
Like great Waluigi before him, Petey Piranha is a prime example of a filler character. Do some people think that just because a character has been in a handful of games (again: the Mario Sports titles mainly, and some other Mario spinoffs), that he's automatically labeled important? Do YOU think that Petey Piranha is worthy enough to represent the Mario franchise? Those are some pretty big shoes to fill.
I've only seen a few of Petey's potential movesets, and I must say, they're about as lackluster as his fanboys' arguments.
[/rant]
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Well, now that I'm done, feel free to discuss, argue and flame me (which is what a good number of you will probably end up doing).
-H. Megamix
