Sandy
Smash Champion
The Morons Guide to Zelda
Welcome to the morons guide to Zelda, a very simple 10 step program to help you on your way to beating any Zelda game on the big screen.
Welcome to the morons guide to Zelda, a very simple 10 step program to help you on your way to beating any Zelda game on the big screen.
Step1: Start your adventure in very random medieval village of peasants and country folk, in which you have no parents.
Step 2: Run around random village killing random chicken and doing various favors for neighbors until your girl friend/sister/princess Zelda is kidnaped by Gannon.
Step 3: Get a sword and shield somewhere in your very random village, and set out to save said girl friend/sister/princess Zelda.
Step 4: Wen you reach your girl friend/sister/princess Zelda, attempt to save her, only to be almost killed by evil force.
Step 5: At this point, you probably have a mystical guiding fairy/boat/twilight thing, a green outfit, and know you have a magical power of a random hero guy.
Step 6: Now, your guide will tell you what to do. You however have no idea what’s going on, just do what they tell you or you may very well die.
Step 7:Go through random dungeons collecting random magical objects, Hyrule has probably at lest 500 of them, each very important and “well hidden.”
Step 8: If at any time you get stuck in said dungeon, run in circles like a moron until you figure out what the **** your supposed to do. If this is to hard, give up, or throw your remote into the tv. If all else fails get the guide book, thus killing the w hole puzzle solving point of the game, or turn to the internet and ask some random Zelda obsessed geek who beat the game 6 hours after they got it.
Step 9: Eventually the triforce comes into play. After all this running around like a moron, you have finally reached the part where you are reunited with your girl friend/sister/princess Zelda, and kill Gannon.
Step 10: Congratulations, you have beaten the latest Zelda game! But, be sure to wait at lest 6 months after you get the game before telling people you beat it, or they will think you are a geek, which you are.
Follow these very simple steps, and in no time, you will beat your latest and greatest Zelda game!
Step 2: Run around random village killing random chicken and doing various favors for neighbors until your girl friend/sister/princess Zelda is kidnaped by Gannon.
Step 3: Get a sword and shield somewhere in your very random village, and set out to save said girl friend/sister/princess Zelda.
Step 4: Wen you reach your girl friend/sister/princess Zelda, attempt to save her, only to be almost killed by evil force.
Step 5: At this point, you probably have a mystical guiding fairy/boat/twilight thing, a green outfit, and know you have a magical power of a random hero guy.
Step 6: Now, your guide will tell you what to do. You however have no idea what’s going on, just do what they tell you or you may very well die.
Step 7:Go through random dungeons collecting random magical objects, Hyrule has probably at lest 500 of them, each very important and “well hidden.”
Step 8: If at any time you get stuck in said dungeon, run in circles like a moron until you figure out what the **** your supposed to do. If this is to hard, give up, or throw your remote into the tv. If all else fails get the guide book, thus killing the w hole puzzle solving point of the game, or turn to the internet and ask some random Zelda obsessed geek who beat the game 6 hours after they got it.
Step 9: Eventually the triforce comes into play. After all this running around like a moron, you have finally reached the part where you are reunited with your girl friend/sister/princess Zelda, and kill Gannon.
Step 10: Congratulations, you have beaten the latest Zelda game! But, be sure to wait at lest 6 months after you get the game before telling people you beat it, or they will think you are a geek, which you are.
Follow these very simple steps, and in no time, you will beat your latest and greatest Zelda game!