Machete

[BobbySiege]

Just got back from an advanced screening of the new Robert Rodriquez movie Machete. It was a very solid 2 out of 5. Now to be clear, there are less than 4 movies in my mind that have actually earned a 5 out of 5 so understand that a 2 out of 5 means that it was an average movie. If you have a hard-on for violence, random nudity and cheap laughs then by all means go see this film, but you will find little to no substance in the film. At the end it gets rather preachy as well.

The technical stuff that no one wants to read:
The cinematography left a lot to be desired. I found myself constantly staring at boring shots of Danny Trejo doing diddly. The special effects fluctuated in quality as in the magical world of Machete guns have little to no kick and explosions are lackluster except in special occasions where they become ridiculous for very simple situations. The fight choreography was excellent all around, but the longer the movie drew on the more campy the fight scenes became. Robert DeNiro was excellent, Steven Segal played a very fitting role and Danny Trejo did that thing he does in every movie where he looks constipated. Basically, the camera angles put me in a very believable environment (bad thing) where outrageous things happened, the acting was sub-par for the most part and there were a lot of tatas.

 

[embracethe12]

I will not support this movie because of you.

 

[pockyD]

jessica alba?

 

[MacD]

what 4 movies did you give a 5 out of 5 to?

 

[BobbySiege]

Jessica Alba was nude in one shower scene. That was all. Acting was Jessica Alba acting. /shrug

My "5 star" movie list is not quite as elite as I made it out to be, but I would say Citizen Kane, A Clockwork Orange (because it revolutionized contemporary film), Casablanca and One Flew Over The Cuckoo's Nest. I would add JCVD, but I keep it out mostly because I'm so biased when it comes to that particular piece of art.

 

[Lovage]

we have a movie thread u know

 

[Brian]

i think you may not understand the point of making a grindhouse style movie

 

[BobbySiege]

You misunderstand that it was done poorly.

Go find someone else's bridge to sit under Lovage.

 

[Brian]

almost all your descriptions were basically all things that i would expect if i were going to watch a 70s b-movie. your descriptions make it sound like robert rodriguez succeeded in making a low substance, ***** and action filled grindhouse style flick.

im not saying you have to like it
or that you're 'wrong'
this is just my view of your review

 

[pockyD]

jessica alba?

 

[BobbySiege]

almost all your descriptions were basically all things that i would expect if i were going to watch a 70s b-movie. your descriptions make it sound like robert rodriguez succeeded in making a low substance, ***** and action filled grindhouse style flick.

im not saying you have to like it
or that you're 'wrong'
this is just my view of your review

Respec. I felt that the contemporary feel killed it for me.

 

[sidefx]

i remember reading somewhere where jessica alba said she would never do a nude scene, and that any "nude" scene with her in it is a body double.


=(((((



http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=F037x4YEwoI


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