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Jesus Christ for Brawl!

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Luke Groundwalker

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JESUS CHRIST:


"Thou shalt brawl!"​


Reasons he should be in:
Jesus Christ is one of the most influential people in the history of mankind. Sakurai KNOWS this. And most likely, he's going to put this fictional character in either as third party (Wisdom Tree) or first party to represent Devil World (yes, he was in Devil World). I'm 100% sure that by this reasoning, he WILL be in Brawl as playable.

Alts (adding more later):

Black Jesus


He was in:
The Bible
Devil World

Moves (changing later):
B - Laser beam
B> - Smacking someone with a giant Bible
B^ - Floating, literally, as long as he wants and where he wants
Bv - Healing himself
Grab - Turning the other character's face into wine, making its percentage rapidly to increase

Thoughts? Suggestions?
 
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Sonink

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Raptor Jesus or GTFO.

Also, not funny. Christianity isn't even a major religion in Japan. Yeah I looked it up. Wanna fight about it?
 
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Luke Groundwalker

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Messages
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Sonink said:
Raptor Jesus or GTFO.
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****, I forgot, he'll be an alt.
Sonink said:
Also, not funny. Christianity isn't even a major religion in Japan. Yeah I looked it up. Wanna fight about it?
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This isn't supposed to be funny, I'm dead serious. And Christianity may not be big in Japan, but it's big everywhere else. Sakurai wants to appeal to the world, and Christians all over would love to play as their favorite superhero/fictional character, boosting up the sales.
FrozenRoy said:
*Joins unanimous vote of unfunny*

Even when I tried to make a joke of it it was a failure.
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How am I supposed to take that as legit when you're a blatant fan of Roy, a sh-tty character?
 
Blackadder

Blackadder

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I don't find this that funny. Not because I think it's offensive, as "Nothing in comedy is sacred" but this isn't funny simply because it isn't written in a kinda "Woah that's awesome!" style. Also, you seem to be offending people,.
 
D

dantemasta

Smash Apprentice
Joined
Mar 4, 2007
Messages
128
This isn't funny, plus it's just plain dumb. It's a blatant insult against Christianity, and no matter how much you try to deny it. The truth is obvious, this thread should be locked.
 
M

Megablueblaster

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Joined
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This game isn't based on religion. Its based on gaming characters.
You don't see sakurai putting the Japanese gods in brawl don't you?
 
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Luke Groundwalker

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FrozenRoy said:
*Points to numerous post that says Roy is a bad character in own posts*

I know he sucks. So, what's your point?
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Get him off of your sig and avy, unless you really enjoy him.
Megablueblaster said:
This game isn't based on religion. Its based on gaming characters.
You don't see sakurai putting the Japanese gods in brawl don't you?
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No, they aren't as cool as Jesus. Jesus has an array of superpowers, he would be a great character in Brawl. Plus, the Devil is in, so what about his counterpart?
 
E

EdwardGordon

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Messages
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What are you, an idiot?

Now if you said "Gandhi for Brawl" as a comment in someone else's thread, then that may get a laugh or two but making a stupid thread?

Just leave. Leave right now. Go sell your Nintendo to some kid who deserves it more, and then bow your head in shame.

Jesus is ashamed. Mario is disgusted. And Sakurai smites you with his all-mighty powers.
 
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Luke Groundwalker

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Messages
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prettymanfairy said:
I love Jesus jokes, but your execution is terrible. I bet your secretly Carlos Mencia....but I'm not sure he can muster up the skills to use a computer.
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The execution isn't supposed to be good. I really want Jesus in Brawl. He would be a potential and cool character. I'll add more to it later, this was just a last minute thing.
FrozenRoy said:
I still, however, fail to see how this relates to my opinion on this topic.
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If you like a sh-tty character, then obviously your opinion doesn't matter.
 
Blackadder

Blackadder

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C'mon guys, break it up, this is silly.

I don't find this at all offensive,though the way you presented the joke almost is. Not a single chuckle worthy joke at all.

Everyone should just stop.
Also, I doubt you seriously want Jesus in. That's pretty outlandish.

Bad joke= No need to star flame war.
 
Misto-Roboto

Misto-Roboto

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I don't know, some people just don't seem to have the humor people used to for this kind of thing. Jesus should have an extra ability, regain his stock every 72 hours.
 
E

EdwardGordon

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Blackadder said:
C'mon guys, break it up, this is silly.

I don't find this at all offensive,though the way you presented the joke almost is. Not a single chuckle worthy joke at all.

Everyone should just stop.
Also, I doubt you seriously want Jesus in. That's pretty outlandish.

Bad joke= No need to star flame war.
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Ahhhh... shucks. Dang you being all smart about it and doing the responsible and mature thing and trying to break it up.

*Kicks dirt* I wanted to see a fight. :/

I salute you.
 
M

Muffin_man

Smash Journeyman
Joined
Jun 8, 2006
Messages
376
The threads suggesting Chuck Norris or the Cookie Monster were vastly more offensive (to my intelligence) than this.

Just saying.
 
L

Luke Groundwalker

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Jul 23, 2007
Messages
1,989
FrozenRoy said:
Micheal Jackson.

Though a Micheal Jackson + Zombie team would be good.

Final Smash = Thriller.
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Michael Jackson would be amazing. He has dance moves, magic moves, etc. You name it. All powered by the juices of little boys. He could easily be Sega's representative.
 
Blackadder

Blackadder

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It's not that I don't have a sense of humour, not at all.
You just havn't made a good joke thread.
Now, this is pretty amusing:

Misto-Roboto said:
I don't know, some people just don't seem to have the humor people used to for this kind of thing. Jesus should have an extra ability, regain his stock every 72 hours.
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He drew a gag from the old story of Jesus rising, and used some real humour tactics. You've just come in, said "Jesus for Brawl" and expected to get major lulz.

I suggest you try again, though maybe with a less controversal topic.
And a joke or two.
 
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