Nelo Vergil
Smash Master
Link to original post: [drupal=3478]I just need too rant..[/drupal]
Havent bothered making a blog for a while...but...I dont know, too much on my mind, and in my heart...I guess I just need too vent publically about it, even if its pointless process.
Last time I blogged, I was happy as could possibly be, just publically stating for them just....how in love I was I guess. Time passes though...people change there minds on this stuff. People hurt each other...they dont mean it, but it happens. I got a lot of happy memories from that time, but at the same time, like the other times I opened my heart, I got a lot of scars as well. Worst, things between us have become awkward...they want to avoid me too avoid the heart ache I guess.
There's the first issue...now the one thats more pressing on my mind...lately...I dont know. I love this person a lot, but lately Im left wondering about there feelings. If I show affection, it doesnt really seem to be returned often...like for her, its an after thought it seems lately. Ive never been good with this stuff..so perhaps Im being...overbearing..maybe Im proceeding with it too quickly...but its just..I feel like if I act like her friend when things become random...that'll just turn her away from any relationship feelings...but it would be nice too see it more, like...I want her to intiate it at times, not respond barely if I say it and give a cold shoulder otherwise...Im probably taking it the wrong way, it definetly isnt the first time Ive done it...but...is asking for a little more affection in turn so wrong..I realize that for her, its a tough time....and I want too be supportive, but it seems really hard right now, because of the apparent invisible wall that seems too be there right now. I just wish I knew what was right when...without worrying so much about it, but I just want the other person too be happy regardless.
Anyway, pointless 5 am rant complete...I guess I feel a little better after doing that...but at the same time, I feel even more confused about everything...bleh.
Havent bothered making a blog for a while...but...I dont know, too much on my mind, and in my heart...I guess I just need too vent publically about it, even if its pointless process.
Last time I blogged, I was happy as could possibly be, just publically stating for them just....how in love I was I guess. Time passes though...people change there minds on this stuff. People hurt each other...they dont mean it, but it happens. I got a lot of happy memories from that time, but at the same time, like the other times I opened my heart, I got a lot of scars as well. Worst, things between us have become awkward...they want to avoid me too avoid the heart ache I guess.
There's the first issue...now the one thats more pressing on my mind...lately...I dont know. I love this person a lot, but lately Im left wondering about there feelings. If I show affection, it doesnt really seem to be returned often...like for her, its an after thought it seems lately. Ive never been good with this stuff..so perhaps Im being...overbearing..maybe Im proceeding with it too quickly...but its just..I feel like if I act like her friend when things become random...that'll just turn her away from any relationship feelings...but it would be nice too see it more, like...I want her to intiate it at times, not respond barely if I say it and give a cold shoulder otherwise...Im probably taking it the wrong way, it definetly isnt the first time Ive done it...but...is asking for a little more affection in turn so wrong..I realize that for her, its a tough time....and I want too be supportive, but it seems really hard right now, because of the apparent invisible wall that seems too be there right now. I just wish I knew what was right when...without worrying so much about it, but I just want the other person too be happy regardless.
Anyway, pointless 5 am rant complete...I guess I feel a little better after doing that...but at the same time, I feel even more confused about everything...bleh.
