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Counsel Wars

Armagopalypse

Smash Journeyman
Joined
Aug 12, 2007
Messages
252
Location
Between the grahm and the 'mallow.
NOTICE: Finished another Chapter. I'll try to keep you posted about the future.




This isn't exactly creative or well thought out but here goes anyway. Once you start telling me how bad it is tell me WHY instead of just saying "OMG you suck" because I'm not a writer by any means, so I could use some help. So here goes....

It was November, 2006. This was to be a special month, as it had been a year since the takeover.

Once there had been balance. Sony, Nintendo, and Microsoft were the rulers of three mighty kingdoms. None had ever gotten along, and the three warring nations were constantly fighting. Still, this had little effect on most of the people, and life went on just fine. But, one day, on November 22 2005, something happened that neither Nintendo nor Sony had anticipated...

A new champion had arisen.

At first no one knew who or what it was. A flash of silver was all any survivors could report before their squadrons were decimated. One by one Sony and Nintendo's forces were torn apart. Their respective leaders could only watch with horror as one territory after the next was lost. By the time anyone knew what had happened, victory was already imminent.

Microsoft’s Xbox 360 now reigned supreme.

With it superior graphics, hard drive, and games, none could stand up to it. Microsoftians worshiped this new being as a god, while it either crushed the Nintendonians and Soninese or converted them to his will, and within a month most of the known world was conquered.

Nintendo and Sony rulers fled for their lives across the sea to remote islands, leaving their loyal subjects behind to their fate. While they would continue to smuggle merchandise to their subjects under Microsoft’s radar, Microsoft would still be supreme ruler of the land.

But all was not lost….

TO BE CONTINUED
 

Armagopalypse

Smash Journeyman
Joined
Aug 12, 2007
Messages
252
Location
Between the grahm and the 'mallow.
March 2007

We had been at sea for months. Day after day I stared as the ocean waves beat up against the sides of the vessel, thinking, wondering.

Were the others back home alright?

Where were we going?

Were we ever going home?

As the sovereignty argued day and night in the captain’s quarters, the rest of us were left to our own devices. Salted meat for breakfast. Bathing in sea water. Salted meat for lunch. And, if we were REALLY lucky, more salted meat for dinner. At first I had thought if I had to keep eating salted meat I’d hurl myself to the sharks.

Of course, once we stopped eating dinner entirely a few months in I savored every bite. And now that we had gone a week without lunch I saved the few scraps of meat to eat throughout the day. No one spoke it, but we all secretly hoped more would die off, so the rest of us wouldn’t starve.

Only a fraction of the Nintendonians remained. The sovereignty ate like….well…..sovereigns, giving us the scraps. Those of us still among the living were beginning to envy the dead. At least they didn’t have hunger cramps. Drinking our own urine wasn’t doing wonders either.

I hung over the side of the ship, thinking off all these things while I noticed a strange behavior between the others. Some were talking excitedly, but many were simply hugging one another, sobbing uncontrollably.

“What’s going on?” I asked the man nearest to me.

“You haven’t heard?? Word from the crow’s nest, we’ve spotted land!”

I couldn’t help it. I hugged the complete stranger in front of me, and even stranger he hugged me back. Then I sprinted towards the bow of the ship, crowding among the others. Just along the horizon a mass was beginning to form.

We were all talking amongst one another excitedly. Cheers and shouts rung out and someone was trying to strike up the national anthem. I was singing horribly off key when I noticed that all had become silent, and were facing towards the stern, bowing. Quickly I spun around.
Lord Gamecube had emerged from his quarters. I quickly dropped to my knees with the others. Supreme Commander of all our armies, he was the only Nintendonian to ever face Xbox 360 in one on one combat and live. However, he hadn’t escaped without the horrible gash that ran across his arm.

“We are approaching land,” he announced in his loud and booming voice. “Gather all you are willing to carry, we set forth at night.”

At that we all stood, bowed, and gathered up our things.

As I gathered up what little I could still call my own, I thought for a moment of what had become of the Soninese. We had offered to disembark together into the sea before we fled, but they had refused. Having once owned over half the world, the Soninese were incredibly proud, and would “never befriend a pathetic nation such as Nintendo.” So they sailed off the opposite direction, and we never saw them again.

Dusk had fallen, and the scouts had returned. They had found nothing but wildlife, and we would reach no opposition moving in. So without further delay, we traversed into our new home, and a new future.

But we couldn’t escape our past….

TO BE CONTINUED
 

demoncaterpie

Smash Champion
Joined
Oct 4, 2004
Messages
2,224
Location
Abra abra cadabra. I wanna reach out and grab ya!
This is actually pretty good. Sure, your style isn't spot on, and some of your sentences need work, but this was a very enjoyable read.

You use some great details in your stories. It seems like all you need is practice. Keep writing and I know you'll get better!

I can't wait to read the next chapter!
 

Armagopalypse

Smash Journeyman
Joined
Aug 12, 2007
Messages
252
Location
Between the grahm and the 'mallow.
Wow, my first comment, and it wasn't even hateful! :chuckle: Well, now that I know there's a whole one person reading this I'll make the next chapter....




April 5, 2007

It has been almost a month since we have arrived here. We have adapted well, but I can tell that trying to forge a new lifestyle has made many homesick. I had always just thought of Gamecube as a warrior, but in these last few weeks he has helped many, including me, settle in. He obviously has some experience in living off the land, and we are all glad he’s here to help.

Needless to say, there was much more to our island than our little village we had built. Although most seemed occupied in day to day affairs, I had no family of my own, so I spent much of my day exploring our surroundings.

The island, to put it simply, was beautiful. Having grown up in modest farming country the lush meadows, hills, beaches, and valleys took my breath away. I soon became obsessed with my explorations. I spent more and more time out in the wilderness, and soon I wouldn’t come home some nights at all. Obviously, people started to take notice. As I left early one morning on one of my escapades I was stopped by a man. I had obviously seen him on the ship often, but I knew him only by face. He was a dark haired man with beady eyes, and his horribly tangled hair and beard showed he made no effort at personal hygiene at all.

“Ahoy there,” he yelled to me. “Where do you think you’re going?”

I stared at the man blankly. “What’s it to you?”

“What’s it to me?” the man laughed. “We’re starting to build another fishing boat today, that’s what.”

“Okay, well good luck then,” I said, trying to walk around him, but he blocked my path.

“Say, I don’t recognize you. Have you helped with any of the building projects at all?”

I just stared. The answer was obviously “no,” but I had a hunch of how this man would react to that.

“You haven’t, have you? This is a team effort! I’m not going to stand by and let one man benefit from others while he does nothing! Now you’re going to stay and help!”

“I don’t care about a dumb fishing boat” I roared. People were starting to come out of their tents now. I don’t know what was coming over me, but I wanted to continue exploring no matter what.

“Can you believe this? This guy doesn’t want to do his share!” The man in front of me yelled to the gathering crowd. “He just wants to mooch off all of us and give nothing in return.

I stared determinedly at the man, but I could tell the crowd behind me was getting angry.

“What do you mean?”

“Are you serious?”

“Who do you think you are?”

Soon individual voices were being drowned out into a roar. At least half the village had to be behind me.

Then I could hear one voice come out from the crowd. “Well if he doesn’t want to help us, then he shouldn’t even live with us!”

I couldn’t take it anymore. “What are you talking about? That’s not what I want, are you all mad??”

But the crowd was already lost. A chant was rising up, and I was afraid it would go to violence. So, without another thought, I ran. Within minutes the reality of what I had done hit me. I had no food, no supplies, no fresh water. How was I going to survive? Even while I was thinking this I continued running, as if I was still on autopilot. One thought kept on flashing through my head. No food, no water, no hope.








April 7, 2007
I was weak. Very weak. I had been traveling the wilderness for days with no sign of water. Of course, within hours of running away I turned back, until I realized I hadn’t left a trail, and had no idea where I was. So I wandered aimlessly hour after hour, hoping to stumble upon some good fortune. Lucky for me, I did.

Eventually, I stumbled across a particularly high hill. Thinking that maybe there might be water on the top, I decided to climb it. It couldn’t have taken long, but in my weakened state it seemed like hours. Every now and then I’d run into a large group of rocks, and I’d have to go a bit down the hill and start climbing up again. Of course, after doing this a few times my calves were burning. Finally I reached the top….and beheld a sight like no other.

I must have been on the highest point in the island, because I could see from coast to coast, yet there was no sign of my village, or any water. Defeated, I collapsed onto the ground utterly defeated.

For the next few hours, I felt myself slipping in and out of consciousness, yet I did little to stop it. I dreamt of many things. Once I envisioned myself climbing up a hill, yet every time I was about to reach the top that beady eyed, bearded man would kick my hands and I’d fall back down again. In another I dreamt of a fat mustached man in a red hat and overalls eating pasta… In any case, by the time I was fully awake again, it was the dead of night.

Standing up, I stretched, yawned (my throat was drier than ever), and looked around. It was pitch black. With no hope of climbing back down again in this light, I was going to settle down to rest when I saw a prick of light in the darkness. I blinked and rubbed my eyes, but it was still there. It had to be the village! I started sprinting forward and, completely forgetting I was half a mile from the ground, tumbled down the rock. Thankfully this face of it was fairly smooth, but of course after tumbling half a mile down I hit the ground hard, and heard a definitive crack as pain shot up my leg. I could feel a wetness spreading across my leg. In my weakened state, this was too much for me, so I passed out. In my last moments of awareness….


I could swear I heard footsteps….


TO BE CONTINUED
 

Armagopalypse

Smash Journeyman
Joined
Aug 12, 2007
Messages
252
Location
Between the grahm and the 'mallow.
BTW I'm far too lazy to proofread any of this, so please excuse the grammatical errors. :crazy:

April ??, 2007
Slowly, very slowly, I awoke. Immediately I felt a throbbing pain in my legs. Well, at least I was alive. I guessed that was a defining plus. I rolled over, and immediately realized it was a horrible idea. Fresh pain shot through my leg, almost making me pass out all over again. But I felt something else against my leg too. Something hard and stiff. Careful not to move around too much, I slowly lifted my head and looked down.

Someone had put a splint on my leg.

I laid back down, a bit more relaxed. Thankfully, someone from the village had found me, and decided not to let me die. How generous.

However, as my eyes adjusted to the darkness, something didn’t seem right. Still half asleep, it took me a little while to figure out I wasn’t in a cabin, I was in a cave! I had explored the area well enough to know there were no caves near the village.

As I wondered who (or what) could have found me, a voice suddenly broke the darkness.

“You being awake now, neh?”

Of course, I started at the noise, and a new wave of pain shot up from my leg.

“You starting be more careful of that leg now, neh? Don’t awanna cracking it in two, heheh.”

I tried to greet the stranger and ask who he was at the same time. So in the end a weird muffled sound came out of my dry throat.

“You no speaking in English, neh? I’m being sorry then, since itta alls I know. Unless yous knowing the native tounges.”

Coughing for a long time, I could finally get some raspy words out. “Wh-Who are you?”

“Ohs, yous not sounding no good, neh? I’s getcha some water.”

After a moment, I felt something warm and wet splashing on my lips. If it was water, it tasted completely wrong. It was probably diseased. Of course, I would’ve drunk nitroglycerin at that point, and I guzzled it down in seconds.

After coughing a few more times I coughed out. “Th-Tha-Thanks.”

“Ohs, you no metioning it. You is dropping down on the doorsteps. The bleeding alls over the place. I’s been living always alone, but whats I do else, leaving you to die, neh?”
Feeling a little less dizzy, I finally built up the courage to sit up. “You never answered me, who are you?”

“I’s having none names. I being told that I’s ma dying when I’s born, and I’s never had none pa.”

“That’s….That’s horrible. I’m sorry.”

“It being okay. I was raising by I’s village. I’s owing them alots. Thems always being of soso nice.”

I knew there was something wrong with that, but I couldn’t think of it before the stranger went on.

“So everying still being soso nice as I being grown up. Soon I’s no longer boy, but I’s man of village. I’s proud of who I’s am. For along timing everything stay soso nice, but nothing ever staying that ways, neh?”

But I was only half listening to this, as I had finally found out what was wrong about this story.

“You said there was a village you grew up in.”

“Yes.”

“But there IS no other village! When we came to this island there was no one else there.”

“Aye,” the stranger said, sounding much more glum. “I’s being getting there. Yous seeing, the soso nice life I being living don’t last too long. Others come along, kinda liking of yous and yous people, but there being much mores of them. Theys coming in manya boat. Theys think theys so specials, speaking strange toungues. Theys coming to our village, calling of thems the people of Sega. We’s having hard of time speaking, with ours different tonguings, but we’s making out some. Theys saying theys been driving out of thems home, and theys coming here fer a fresh of start. I’s and I’s people no argue. We’s saying that theres many land, and we’s can share with no problems. Now don’t that sounding like a good deal, neh?”

“Yes, yes,” I answered. Now that I was transfixed, I didn’t even notice that a light rain had started outside. “I remember those people faintly, I was only a young boy when they were around. Sega shared the continent with Nintendo, before Microsoft and Sony arrived from somewhere across the sea. They put up a good fight, but Nintendo beat them down hard, and once the Sony people landed on their country’s shores and decided they wanted the land for there own, Sega had no chance. So they fled across the sea in the opposite direction. I guess the currents brought them here, just like us.”

“Yous speaking truth, it seeming. Anyways, these Segas share land for while. They teaching us theys tounges, but they being too proud to learning ours. But we’s no minding, we’s easygoing people. But the Segas being not so gentle. Theys calling us ‘primitive’ and ‘lesser.’ We’s no hurt by this, but we’s were not being ready for what coming next.” His voice took that gloomy tone again, and he got much quieter. “You’s guessing whats that being, neh?”

“What?” I asked, desperate for the man to just finish the story. I don’t know why, but I had a feeling it was important for him to do so. “What??”

“Theys being fighting us!” The man sobbed. It sounded like he was on the verge of tears. “We’s no seeing it coming. We’s have no weapons or fighting, we’s never had none to fighting against. Theys burn our housings, theys killing ours animals, theys taking our children, theys beating my friends. Theys wanting our land, but we’s no wanting to gives it. So theys kill our chief, theys destroy everything. Theys wanting to killing us, but we’s no dumb. We’s have nothing left theres, so we’s run.
"Theys trying to chase us, trying to killing us, but we’s smarter than theys. We’s knowing the island better than theys. So we’s hide. We’s building ours new village wheres they no seeing us. But things not being as good. We’s stuck living on hard soil. Soil no goods for cropping, no goods for animals. No fresh water nearing by. We’s in bad shape, and we’s sore at theys for taking ours land. But wes survive. But as I saying, nothing ever stay soso nice, neh?"

“No, it doesn’t.” I answered, finally noticing the weather and glancing uneasily at the building monsoon outside.

“Anyways, one days flocks of birds be falling from the sky. Just falling dead. We’s know this weird, but we’s so hungry we’s cooking them up and eating them. But in days things getting weird. We’s getting sick, one by one. We’s not knowing what goings on, but we’s getting sick. Soon I’s only one being none sick. I’s knowing not what to doing. And whens first few starting die of sickness I’s run. I’s scared and I’s none want getting sick. So I’s find this cave in this valley, and I decides it good place to staying. And I’s could climbing up hill to see’s both villages. But, I’s…I’s,” the man stammered. I could tell from his sharp breaths that he was sobbing heavily.
“I’s watching thems both going. First I’s watching I’s people dying, then I’s watching Segas contracting sick, and I’s watch thems dying. Soon I’s only ones left. I’s no know why I’s not getting sick, but I’s live here alones for long timing, untils yous come. But I’s none forgetting. I’s remember Segas, so I’s not show I’s until nows. But yous no seeming bad, yous seeming dumb for walking downs cliff, but you’s no seeming bad."

“Well, thank you,” I answered the man. “But I’m not exactly one of my people anymore. They shunned me out. If you don’t mind….I would like to stay with you.”


Surprising, the man starting laughing. “Yous being bold. But yous being nice, also. I’s like yous. Yous stay."

“Well, if I’m staying with you, I’ll need to know what to call you."

The man laughed some more as he stepped out of the shadows and into the firelight for the first time. I gasped, I had been expecting a man in his late twenties, around my age. But instead I saw an old man. However, “old man” really didn’t do him justice. If it weren’t for his wizened eyes, snow white hair, and dark wrinkled skin, he looked to be stronger and healthier than I was. I noticed that tight muscles rippled under his tattered shirt.

“I’s having no name, but yous can call me Revolution...”


Crap, I still have work to do, I'd better finish it all my before it gets to late and I get too :tired: so I'll be finishing this tomorrow, whether you like it or not.
 

Armagopalypse

Smash Journeyman
Joined
Aug 12, 2007
Messages
252
Location
Between the grahm and the 'mallow.
Haha sorry, but I usually can't come on until the afternoon. Anyway, here's the next chapter. It seems long because of the paragraph breaks, but it's probably not much longer than the prologue so I'll be getting the next installment as soon as a can for the whole 2 people on the edge of their seats. :p




April 7, 2007
“Ok then,” I answered, feeling a tad awkward, but settling on shaking the man’s hand. “It seems I’ll be staying here for a long time, so thanks for everything.”

“Yous no having mentions of it.”

I still had many questions to ask Revolution, but my fatigue was beginning to catch up to me and they soon slipped out of my mind. I wanted to just go back to sleep, but there was this strange roaring sound. I turned my head one way, and then another, but the noise wouldn’t get out of my head. I was becoming incredibly frustrated, but I noticed that Revolution looked alarmed also.

“What is that?” I asked, sliding towards the mouth of the cave as quickly as I could in my handicapped state.

“Yous best moving to backs of cave now.”

It only took a moment of looking outside to realize my mistake. It was raining harder than ever, and a torrent of water was catapulting down the hillside straight towards the cave.

“Yous best moving backs! It’s being higher up in backs!”

He started climbing down from the back of the cave towards me, so, in the second dumb act I had committed that night, I stood up to move, completely forgetting about my leg. Of course, It buckled painfully, and collapsed, my head falling hard on top of a rock. As everything began growing dark (again) I could feel water pouring over my back in sheets.




When I came to, I could tell from the behinds of my eyelids that it must be morning. Obviously, I was still alive, Revolution must have saved me again.

I really have to remember to thank that guy.

I opened my eyes expecting to see the cave again, but instead I was blinded by a dazzling bright light and I had to close them again. It was far too bright to just be daylight. I slowly opened my eyes again, waiting for them to adjust to the light. But all I could see was light.

Maybe it isn’t so obvious I’m alive.

I took a few steps forward hoping to find something, but I didn’t get a chance to look for long. Suddenly I could see something in the distance. I squinted to see it, but obviously it was much closer than it looked. Soon a giant blue object was rushing towards me. I tried to get a closer look at it, but it appeared to just be a blob. I was so busy trying to figure out what it was that I didn’t realize it was wrapping itself around me before it was too late. I could feel it latching on tighter and tighter until its blue shapeless mass was all I could see. I tried struggling, but it only grabbed on tighter. I felt for sure it was about to crush me when suddenly, it let go. I could still only see blue, but I couldn’t feel anything on me anymore. But, even stranger, the pain in my leg was gone. I stood up, and I hardly had time to acknowledge that my leg wasn’t broken anymore before the ground suddenly gave way, taking me with it.

From the way I was tumbling end over end with nothing below me, I knew I must be falling. But there was nothing but the blue light everywhere and, even stranger, there was no air rushing past me. If I couldn’t feel that there was no floor below me, and if I couldn’t feel my stomach lurching from spinning end over end as I fell, I wouldn’t even have known I was fallng.

Then I could see a figure walking towards me.

Even as I tumbled in the air, he stayed in front of my face, standing there. I was very disoriented and dizzy, but I could see he looked like a boy. However, he was strangely disproportionate, and even stranger he had a mushroom on his head!

The strange figure moved his head close to mine. “What’s wrong?” he asked it a raspy, yet eerily shrill voice.

I was dumbstruck. How could he just be standing there?? “Well I’m…..falling.”

“Really? That’s different.”

“So, um, why are you just standing there in front of me?”

“Well, why are you just falling there in front of me?”

I was still dumbstruck. “Where…..where are we?”

“Here.”

“I know but where are we? And who are you?”

“We’re here, and I’m me. You know, you’re really starting to make me feel dizzy just dangling there.”

I was getting very frustrated at this strange thing, but before I could say anything else to it I suddenly started speeding away from the thing.

It just stared at me as I sped away. “Well, good luck with that ‘falling’ thing.”
I had no way of keeping track, but I seemed to “fall” for a long time. Eventually I could see a black speck far off. But, like everything else, it wasn’t nearly as far away as it seemed. In moments I slammed down onto something squishy and wet. I sat up, realizing what it was.

Spaghetti?

I wasn’t left to ponder this for long, because soon another figure was speeding towards me, stopping right in front of me. Or rather, over me.

It was the same plump, mustached, overall wearing man with his red hat that I had seen in my dream. But now he was at least 50 feet tall.

“Would you mind climbing out of my dinner?” The man boomed.

TO BE CONTINUED





Yeah and it's probably still showing that I don't proofread any of this, so sorry.
 

Armagopalypse

Smash Journeyman
Joined
Aug 12, 2007
Messages
252
Location
Between the grahm and the 'mallow.
So here's another chapter. Don't forget that I'd love your feedback of any kind.






???
“So, you’re finally back.”

“Wh-wh-wh-who are you??” I stammered back, utterly terrified.

The behemoth sighed, but to me it felt more like a gale! “You people, always throwing your names around. You should never reveal so much so lightly. A name holds far more than just words. It is- oh for god’s sake stop blubbering like a animal. I’m not going to eat you!”

“Well fine so, um , what are you?” I asked, starting to calm down.

“A far more respectable question,” the giant said. But suddenly, he was shrinking, along with the plate of pasta. Or maybe I was growing. In this sea of blue you couldn’t tell anything.

In any case, soon we were about the same height.

“Although I call myself something different, you would refer to me as a Moderator.”

“A sprite?? But… but they aren’t real!”

“Now why would you think that? I’m sure you heard the stories-”

“Yes, but they were stories! How can you-“

“When did the stories ever say they were only stories? Hmmm?”

I tried to search for a response, but the man went on.

“Anyway, I’m not sure how much you have been told, so I’ll tell you everything. Before people, before the animals, before the land, the sky, the sea, even before the stars themselves, there were the Moderators. He shaped and formed the cosmos and, eventually, we shaped your world. But once we finished it, we were entranced by its beauty. We felt it deserved more. So, after long consideration, which in the scale of your time would mean millennia, we decided that we would create more beings in our likeness to care for the world and help it flourish. And after creating these beings, we felt an immense sense of pride in our work. So we decided to leave a great gift, called the Counsel.”

“Okay, your making this up, right?”

“Of course I’m not! Do you think I would joke about this? Listen, this is more important that I think you realize. The counsel was to lay hidden, until your race’s need was dire, then it would reveal itself. We never thought something like this would happen…”

“Something…something like what?”

“Do you really not understand. This power was meant to be hidden, but it didn’t remain so. About a year ago, a powerful Microsoft shaman was in such deep meditation, he managed to scrape the surface of this power. But of course, all it took was a scrape to understand what he had stumbled across. He became obsessed with tapping into that energy. Soon he was in meditation for days on end, not eating or drinking. Of course, he knew it was only a matter of time before he figured it out.”

“And did he?”

“My god, son! Did I choose the wrong person for this.”

“Choose?!? What do you-”

“Not important! After months, the shaman finally tapped into the counsel fully. The power that flooded him drove his to the brink of insanity. But when he exited the trance he was a new being, greater than any man, powerful, intelligent. He proclaimed himself Xbox 360.
“360 boldly proclaimed himself the new ruler of Microsoft, and obviously this didn’t go over well. Within days Lord Xbox had faced down 360 with every available soldier he had. It was Xbox and his 3,000 soldiers against the lone 360. Xbox never stood a chance.”
“But Lord Gamecube faced 360 alone and lived, he must have-“

“Been toying with him,” the Moderator interrupted. “360 has the power of the counsel. He barely knows how to control it, but he has it nonetheless.”

“Okay, but that’s all in the past now. I ran away from that.”

“Which was wise, but you don’t have to hide anymore.”

“What? But you just said that Xbox 360 was invincible!”

”No, that’s the point. He is far from it! Just let me finish, because I think there is something you should know… because 360 wasn’t the last to discover the counsel.”

“What? Who?”

“Sony was dumbstruck by their utter defeat by Microsoft. Convinced that there was no way that Microsoft could have naturally beaten them, their high priests turned searched for another answer. Ironically, they were right, and they of them managed to tap into the power, and bestow it upon their leader as well, only a few days ago. This second intrusion of the counsel was enough for us to finally notice. I was sent back here to resolve the issue, and here I am.”

“So, if you’re really an all powerful being, then what are you waiting for.”

“I exist on a different plane than your people. I cannot directly interact with anything. We create, then we move on. Aren’t you wondering why you’re talking to me?”

“Well-“

“Because when I tried to contact every Nintendonian, you were the only one I could reach. You were the only mind strong enough to access without driving you insane.”

“So what do you want with me?”

“The new Sony champion, who has taken the name Playstation 3, obviously plans on taking down Microsoft and restoring Sony’s former glory. But no matter who wins, the rest of the world will lose, since whoever wins will surely rule with an iron fist. But they are both ignorant of what they are truly dealing with. Both cared nothing of how they drew the power, but only how much power they could draw. 360 tried to increase his graphics as much as possible, and PS3 did likewise even more recklessly, trying to beat 360 at his own game. But both are mistaken. That is why I am here. That is why I speak to you. You must restore order. You must bring unity and happiness back to this world...”




“You must become the Wii…”




TO BE CONTINUED
 

Armagopalypse

Smash Journeyman
Joined
Aug 12, 2007
Messages
252
Location
Between the grahm and the 'mallow.
Well this is my last chapter for today. I think I'll have like another 2 chapters or so, so it'll probably be done about this time tomorrow. Anyway, here's the next installment. Enjoy....or at least tolerate :p



???
“What are you talking about?!?”

“The need is obviously great enough, and it is time for the counsel to be used for the good of all. I will teach you how to access its power, and you must put a stop to the violence, even if more violence is necessary to do so. The world will be made whole again by your hand. Their graphics are dangerously high, and you can easily take them down if you play your-”

“No, no it won’t. I’m not ready for this. I’ll never be! You have to find someone else!!”

“There IS no one else! If you don’t accept my request, then you will leave the innocent to their fate. And trust me right now it looks horrible! Will you be able to live with that for the rest of your life?”

I took a deep breath and put my head in my hands. “There’ really no other way.”

“I haven’t made that clear?”

I took a few more breaths, trying to put off the inevitable. Finally I answered him. “Ok, I don’t think I’m ready for this, but I guess I have no choice.”

“Once I’m done with you, you will be ready…”

With that, he sat down in front of me cross-legged, staring me down.

He did this for awhile, and eventually I starting feeling awkward, like he was seeing straight through to my core and baring my every secret. This must have gone on for a few minutes, but not knowing what to say, I sat down directly across from the man, assuming that he would go on when he’s ready. The man leaned forward a bit and squinted, as if he was concentrating on me as hard as he could.

Soon a tingling started moving up and down my limbs. I just assumed that I was imagining it, but the more I tried to ignore the sensation, the stronger the feeling got. I could feel myself sweating, and my whole body seemed to be warming up in blotches.

What’s going on?

Within a few moments the light tingling had turned into searing pain. Yet the pain kept increasing! Soon I could feel my every nerve light on fire. I was writhing on the ground now, screaming and roaring in agony. But the pain was so great I was hardly aware of anything. The solid blue color that had surrounded me this whole time had begun flashing. Red, blue, red, white, black, green, red, black, blue, green. Faster and faster until you could hardly distinguish one color from the next. And all the while I saw the mustached man, sitting, squinting at me. Suddenly, a new ringing was in my ears. Slowly, it gained definition until I could hear a man’s faint voice. I closed my eyes tight, concentrating on the voice, concentrating on anything other than the inferno flowing through my body.

“You’s being putting a lots of troubles on I’s, one days yous better being waking up.”

“Wait, I know who that is.”

Suddenly, the pain completely vanished, and slowly I opened my eyes.





I was back in the cave. And I saw Revolution hovering over me.

“Yous awaking! I’s never thinking yous awaking! Yous being in coma for months!”

“Hello Revolution, thank you for- Did you just say I was out for months?!?”

“Yes, I’s being taking cares of you for 4 months. Its being hard working, but I’s does it anyways. Yous do the sames for I’s if yous needing to.”

“Of course I would. Thank you.” But really I was in shock. 4 months?!? My god, what could have happened since then. Yet for being in comatose for so much time I didn’t feel weak at all. In fact, I felt stronger than ever. Still, all I wanted to do for now was curl in the corner of the cave, forget about the dream, and try to take all of this in.

But then a second later, I didn’t want to. I didn’t want to at all. And suddenly a new line of thought came in, strangled my old one, and threw it out the window.

I was new, I was powerful, and I was ready.

“Thank you so much, Revolution, but I am afraid I have to leave now. For good. There is something very important I have to do, and I won’t be coming back.”

“Yes, so, um…” Revolution seemed a bit stunned.

“If you enjoy living alone in this cave, by all means stay. If you want to help change to world for the better, feel free to come.”

“I’s sure that if yous being leaving the caves so quick, yous having important things to do. I’s always hating the living alone. So I’s come.”

“Very well. Come with me.”

I traveled from the cave with Revolution on my heels. I knew I first both needed a boat, and then I needed to find the village again. Strangely, however, I wasn’t even worried. I was as confident as ever.

I wasn’t even surprised when a perfectly built boat was on the shore…


.waiting for me…


TO BE CONTINUED
 

Armagopalypse

Smash Journeyman
Joined
Aug 12, 2007
Messages
252
Location
Between the grahm and the 'mallow.
Man, today was a busy day. But I still managed to at least churn this out for your reading....tolerance.

August 14

For having no idea of what I was planning to do next, I felt exhilarated. As I stood dramatically on the stern of the vessel, staring out at the island as we circumnavigated it, feeling a little nervous about why I wasn’t nervous at all! I was planning on taking down a Warlord who had doubtlessly a quarter-million troops and his command, and all I had was this boat. Yet I couldn’t fathom how I could possibly fail.

The same couldn’t have been said for Revolution, however. He was still a little confused at how I could have woken up from a four month coma and then charge off on a mission to save the world.

“Yous being knowing where we’s going, neh?”

“Of course, I know exactly where we’re going.”

“Yous sure? Yous no seeming quite right yet. You better being sitting down!”

“I’ve never felt so right in a long time, Revolution.”

He opened his mouth like he was about to say something else, but he just froze for a few seconds and awkwardly close it again. Apparently done talking with me, he continued to stand there and watch the waves roll by.

A while later I had a strange feeling in my gut. “We need go ashore, now!”

“What’s you meaning-“

“OFF THE BOAT, NOW!”

I grabbed the old man and, without taking a second to think, I jumped over the edge of the ship, pulling him behind me.

We hit the water, and the freezing cold ocean quickly pulled us under. Quickly kicking of my shoes and pulling off my gloves, I grabbed Revolution and pulled him to the surface. I glanced back a moment and watch the boat go up in flames.

Someone was firing volley after volley of fire tipped arrows at the vessel. The sails were the first to light up, and by the time they were fully ablaze the mast was ready to collapse. Then I noticed a ship appearing on the horizon, and I figured we should make ourselves scarce.

“Come on,” I said, turning to Revolution next to me. I gasped. I had been so intent on watching the ship, I hadn’t noticed that he hadn’t budged the entire time. Luckily the shore was far off, and I quickly reached the surf.

But once I laid him down on the beach, I could feel that he was breathing, and based on the way his muscles were tensing he was about to come to. He looked so much like a 20 year old with white hair, I had complete forgot I had no idea how old he was.

Finally, Revolution opened his eyes and sat up. “That’s being a close call, neh?” he laughed weakly.

I turned to watch what remained of our ship float away with the current. It just appeared a ball of fire floating atop the endless sea now. Even though we had almost died upon it, there was something awe-inspiring about the sight.

“So, hows yous knowing that being going to happen, neh?”

Before I could answer him, I saw the boat I had seen earlier. It was aimed to come ashore right beside us.

“We need to hide,” I said, pointing to the boat coming nearer every moment. I dragged Revolution onto his feet and we started moving towards the forest a little ways from the beach.
“NOW! GETTEM GUYS!”

Instantly after this shout from nowhere, a rain of arrows started shooting past us from all sides. Revolution and I both ducked down, bewildered. Oddly enough, none of the arrows hit us. I could see that several arrows appeared to be coming straight at me from far off, but in the end missed by several yards.

After a few seconds, a different voice called out. “Wait a second. Stop. STOP!”

Slowly the barrage started to fizzle and then died. Then a man stepped out from behind a rock moved out of the shadows. I couldn’t believe it. It was the bearded man who had caught me that fateful morning, and caused me to run from my village. That seemed like a lifetime ago now.

“What is this?” He yelled angrily, as if my appearance was the worst thing that had ever happened to him. “You disappeared months ago; you’re supposed to be dead!”

“Well, I-” but before I could respond, Revolution interrupted me.

“Yous excusing I’ please, but I’s thinking it best wes hide,” Revolution nervously stated, peering back the way we came.

We had climbed a small hill since leaving the beach, and now looking back down I could see the mystery ship had laid anchor at the shore. You could even faintly see people climbing out.

“Okay,” the bearded man said. “Hurry!”

At that a chorus of voices rung out from all around us, one voice standing out louder than the others from the trees. “How can we trust him? He appeared moments before they came ashore.”

“Are you blind, you fool?!?” the bearded man hollered. “They just burned down their ship. Or are you so self absorbed you don’t pay attention to anything other than yourself?”

Well, at least now I knew the man didn’t just hate me personally.

The three of us ducked behind the same boulder the man had appeared from originally. And so, we waited. There was still a general murmur from the hidden people around us, but as the strangers approached, it died down until you could nothing but a lone bird tweeting, until the strangers came so close that it flew away.

As I heard them step into the middle of the clearing, I risked a glance around the rock. I could see five people standing there. Four of them were men. They had long, huge gorilla arm that seemed to extend to their knees, and they were all hunched over somewhat, as if trying to walk on their knuckles. They could’ve been mirror images if one hadn’t have had blonde hair instead of black. The last one was a woman.

There was only one word for her, striking. She wasn’t particularly beautiful, but the way she held herself had the air of a woman of great importance. Not surprisingly, the way the men were looking at her suggested that she was in charge.

“Are you sure that attacking that boat was a good idea?” One of the black-haired men asked her.

“Of course,” she replied, brushing her own wavy black hair away from her large, black eyes. Interestingly the only thing about her that wasn’t dark about her was her voice, which was light and airy. Even her skin was far tanner than her companions, and even her armor was jet black. “They weren’t flying our colors, so they weren’t allies.”

“But that doesn’t mean they were enemies either,” the blonde man mumbled.

“You will not question my authority, Jacobe,” The woman said calmly. From the way the men flinch, however, they acted like she had screamed at them.

“Enough waiting,” I heard the bearded man beside me mumble. “NOW!” he yelled, and in a repeat of before, a rain of arrows fell upon the strangers. But this time the arrows quickly found there mark. An arrow stuck each of the first three men in the shoulder, and struck the woman and the blonde man in their legs. All instantly fell but the woman, who was struggling to remain standing.

Half a dozen men instantly appeared from their hiding place and seized the strangers. The bearded man, Revolution, and I ran out to join them. However, Revolution froze on the spot.

“Wait, I’s being knowing theys! I’s recoginizing their……kind……anywheres. Theys-“




“People of Sega, yes,” the bearded man interrupted. “We need to talk…”

TO BE CONTINUED



By the way, it's hard for me to improve my writing if I don't get any feedback, so if you have a comment or reveiw it would be greatly appreciated.
 

SuperLinkBrothers

Smash Ace
Joined
Jun 26, 2007
Messages
513
Location
Hyrule...OF COURSE!
cool...

that was an interesting post...posts,
Good Job, by the way, I'm more than tolerating your story, it's great, WHO'S WITH ME*a cricket churps outside*oh, um, oh whatever, I'm going on over to Food Wars...bye...
 

Armagopalypse

Smash Journeyman
Joined
Aug 12, 2007
Messages
252
Location
Between the grahm and the 'mallow.
cool...

that was an interesting post...posts,
Good Job, by the way, I'm more than tolerating your story, it's great, WHO'S WITH ME*a cricket churps outside*oh, um, oh whatever, I'm going on over to Food Wars...bye...
Well thanks. It's good to know that a whole one person is reading this story, it's a lot more than I expected anyway :p

Seriously, though, I think I should've said this a few chapters ago (lol), but whoever is actually reading this still post now, because if no one is, I'll probably just finish off this story for myself, but I'll stop wasting space and posting it here.

Let the people (assuming there actually are any) speak!
 

SuperLinkBrothers

Smash Ace
Joined
Jun 26, 2007
Messages
513
Location
Hyrule...OF COURSE!
Blah blah blah, there, I spoke, hey, thnx for posting on my story though Armag, I thought no one was reading it, *sigh* that's life as a writer, oh, I gotta get going now, why don't you read Super Mario Adventure, it's an interactive story, I'm sure you'll like it.
 

Dr. Robotnik

Smash Journeyman
Joined
Jun 5, 2007
Messages
462
Well thanks. It's good to know that a whole one person is reading this story, it's a lot more than I expected anyway :p

Seriously, though, I think I should've said this a few chapters ago (lol), but whoever is actually reading this still post now, because if no one is, I'll probably just finish off this story for myself, but I'll stop wasting space and posting it here.

Let the people (assuming there actually are any) speak!
dude, that was......AWSOME, man i dont care that the grammer was bad, you have got a talent my friend, a true talent, i loved the story, please put another chapter on soon, i read the entire thing strait, i am totaly transfixed in this story.
 

Armagopalypse

Smash Journeyman
Joined
Aug 12, 2007
Messages
252
Location
Between the grahm and the 'mallow.
dude, that was......AWSOME, man i dont care that the grammer was bad, you have got a talent my friend, a true talent, i loved the story, please put another chapter on soon, i read the entire thing strait, i am totaly transfixed in this story.
Wow, I'm just flattered :grin:

Yeah, my grammar really isn't that bad lol I'm just to lazy to go back and proofread it once I'm all done typing it.

Maybe one day I'll go back and edit all of these.....wtf yeah right!

Anyway, I guess I mind as well finish this puppy, so I should have another churned out by tomorrow. I was so busy today I hardly had time to spam in the Brawl character thread.

Stay tuned.

And if there's anyone else out there let me hear your input on this.
 

Dr. Robotnik

Smash Journeyman
Joined
Jun 5, 2007
Messages
462
ya, i know your grammer isn't bad, not a lot of people agree with me it seems, o well, hey check out my story, i have had this for a while, and i dont want to continue it if its lame or doesn't "CATCH" the reader's attention

but ya, you might want to copy and paste this to a word document and copyright this, because this story is good, you might have a natural give waiting to sprout and if it does you will have your first story at hand to remind you of "the good ol days" of your writing correer.
 

Armagopalypse

Smash Journeyman
Joined
Aug 12, 2007
Messages
252
Location
Between the grahm and the 'mallow.
ya, i know your grammer isn't bad, not a lot of people agree with me it seems, o well, hey check out my story, i have had this for a while, and i dont want to continue it if its lame or doesn't "CATCH" the reader's attention

but ya, you might want to copy and paste this to a word document and copyright this, because this story is good, you might have a natural give waiting to sprout and if it does you will have your first story at hand to remind you of "the good ol days" of your writing correer.

Yeah I always write through Word and then copy and paste into a post. At least then it will catch the basic spelling/grammar mistakes, and if my comp crashes as I try to send it I won't have to do it all...over....again. *shudders*




Anyway, the next chapter is done. Tell me what you think.



August 14

Night had fallen, and our procession through the forest was incredibly solemn. I never would have felt at ease with people like this surrounding me, but with these five mysterious intruders in our custody the tension was almost at the breaking point. We seemed to be following no path at all. Gnarled trees shot up in no apparent order, and the woods were so thick they blocked the moon entirely, blanketing us in a sheet of almost complete darkness. I now had so many scrapes on my arms from branches they were starting to feel numb.

“We’s being going ‘round in circles, neh?”

I started so hard that I almost tripped on a tree root. There was something about this eerie forest that made you feel like talking was taboo.

Nonetheless, Revolution continued whispering in my ear. “We’s being passing thems trees five timings already. What’s going ons?”

“I don’t know, Revolution. I’m sure everything is fine.” But he was right. We were lost!

In the darkness, I moved towards the shape that I thought was the bearded man. “Hello? You said you wanted to talk before!”

Even in the near complete darkness, I could tell the man was glaring at me as if I had stolen his wife. “If you want to address me, the names Walter. Learn it! And when I said we need to talk, I didn’t mean now. I’m in charge here. You will follow me without question, you will speak when spoken too, and maybe you will get through this alive. Now fall back and help guard those prisoners!”

Apparently this man hadn’t been in charge for long. If your angry all the time, it stops having effect very fast. “If you’re done,” I retorted, “do you realize we’re going in circles?!?”

For the first time, Walter laughed. He had a deep booming laugh that didn’t befit him at all. “Ah, so you’re even more naïve than I assume. We aren’t going in circles. In fact, we’ve arrived.”

He gestured towards he left, and I noticed a prick of light in the distance. Slowly, it got closer until the source of the glow was just beyond the trees.

We paused briefly for the rear of the procession, which contained the wounded yet struggling prisoners, to catch up. Eventually, we walked through the trees and into the clearing. I was wondering how much the village had changed.

But it wasn’t our village at all.

There were a couple dozen straw woven tents, and one cabin at the very end. The cabin appeared incredibly sloppy, as if the builder was trying to see how fast he could throw it together without it collapsing.
People were moving in between the tents, and I recognized most of them. But I remembered the villagers to be very energetic and excited about any small, joyous detail in life before. Now, each of them appeared as if they were coming from funerals being held inside their tents. The children clung to their mothers, as if they were afraid anyone else would attack them. As we passed in between the rows of tents, the people lined up to watch staring. Once they were all facing me, despite their dismal disposition, what disturbed me the most by far were their eyes. I noticed they mirrored the eyes of the men who had ambushed Revolution and I in the clearing. Not excited, nor solemn or depressed. Just…empty.

I could hear Walter muttering beside me. “Fools, how many times do I have to tell them? I could see this light from a mile away. Why don’t we just cut a path here straight from the beach? Sometimes I wonder if any of these people have any brains at all…”

Soon, I realized that I was being directing towards the rundown shack. Within a few minutes our entire party had gathered into the shack. It seemed even smaller on the inside, with nothing but a few chairs and a table that was hardly standing up. We could hardly all fit. I noticed that Revolution made a point between putting as many people between him and the Segaricans as possible. Being pushed up against the wall, and I could feel the moss and mold growing on the wood rub onto my skin disgustingly.

“Welcome to our base of operations.” Walter began in a light tone. “I’m sure you have many questions.” He was scratching his beard in quick, even strokes, and I noticed his men were shuffling nervously back and forth.

Not exactly subtle. “You don’t trust us, do you?” I asked blatantly. Immediately the mood in the room changed. The men that weren’t guarding the prisoners scuttled over to block the door. Amusing, in the tight space, it took them almost a full ten seconds to reach it. But I had no intention of running.

Walter moved up to inches from my space, instantly taking on his usual wrathful tone. “You arrogant imbecile! You disappeared into the wilderness months ago. You honestly think I believe you could’ve survived out there all this time?!? You stumbled upon THEM, didn’t you?” He hollered, sneering at the prisoners with utmost loathing. “You rather betray your own people than give up your miserable life! You make me sick. The day you didn’t die out there in the wilderness was a sad day for mankind indeed!”

I knew that I was in a bad position, and losing my head would only make things worse. Before I had a chance to reply, the Segarican woman broke in instead.

“Your people attacked us! Did you expect us sit back and accept this? We didn’t want to fight you. We NEVER wanted to fight you!” Her stream of curses that followed only ended once one of the men had kicked her firmly in the stomach.

“Shut up! You killed one of our men for no reason, and our people have been slowly disappearing ever since we found out you existed. You burned our village to the ground! And I won’t rest until every one of you pays back double! You’re monsters!"

The woman weakly attempted to right herself off the floor, but her voice was as steady as ever. “You’re mad!” But the man standing behind her hit her sharply on the back of her head, and she collapsed on the floor, causing more blood to sickeningly flow from her sloppily bandaged wound.

“Tie him and his friend up, and put all of them in storage."

But suddenly, the strange euphoria that had swept over me in Revolution’s cave returned. Why had I been so worried this whole time? It was obvious what I must do.

And it didn’t involve being captured…


TO BE CONTINUED
 

Dr. Robotnik

Smash Journeyman
Joined
Jun 5, 2007
Messages
462
That was really good, i can't wait for the next chapter. oh by the way, i updated my story, its way better than before. i took your advice and put some "Beef" into it. please read it and tell me how it is.
 

FFMMCLXIV

Smash Apprentice
Joined
Jun 25, 2007
Messages
94
Location
Virginia Beach, VA
Killer, man! I already forgot how I found this thread, but I'm glad I did now.

And don't worry so much about the bad grammar. I'm a grammar nut, and I haven't seen anything that would make me want to stop reading. You're doing fine.;)

Now, crank out that next chapter! You're up to 4 commenters now; I'm sure more will come.:)
 

Armagopalypse

Smash Journeyman
Joined
Aug 12, 2007
Messages
252
Location
Between the grahm and the 'mallow.
Killer, man! I already forgot how I found this thread, but I'm glad I did now.

And don't worry so much about the bad grammar. I'm a grammar nut, and I haven't seen anything that would make me want to stop reading. You're doing fine.;)

Now, crank out that next chapter! You're up to 4 commenters now; I'm sure more will come.:)

Sweet, a new record. It's a shame more people don't come to this forum, there's a lot of good work here by a lot of good people. Lol you probably clicked the link in my sig by accident.

As for the next chapter, well... here you go.


August 14



As the men roughly tied Revolution and I up, something told me that I could have easily broken the bonds and cut my way through the entire village if I had to.

But only one man had to die today, and his ego would be his ultimate undoing.

“So this is it then?” I growled. “We rot in your jail until you finally think it’s due time to get rid of us.”

“What are you talking about,” Walter responded. “I never said anything-“

But I cut him off. It was essential I do this exactly right. “Not everyone is as dim as you, Walter. We’re nothing but a nuisance to you alive, but a public execution is just what your ‘people’ need to be fooled to thinking you’re actually doing something. We all saw how desperate and defeated they all were, and you need a way to lie to them that everything will be alright.”

Walter was struggling to keep his face calm, but I could see the vein in his head throbbing. For a man who valued his power so much, he didn’t have much self control over his emotions.

In the man’s defense, his voice was still calm. “Leave us,” he murmured to his men, who were currently standing guard over us.

“Sir, do you think that’s wise, with so many-“

But Walter was done pretending to be calm. “I SAID LEAVE US!!!”

With a mumbled “yessir” the men slowly weaved their way through the tight shack, filing out of the door in the front. Before they closed the door behind them, I noticed that obviously our arrival had already caused much commotion through the “new” village. An execution of prisoners of war would have increased morale greatly indeed.

But now we were alone, bound up in a room with Walter. “They’re so simple minded, just like cattle. Give them exactly what they want and they will give you as much as you want back in return. Don’t you understand, with Lord Gamecube died of that strange sickness, they would have all perished if no one had taken control.”

“So Lord Gamecube is dead?” I asked, but I wasn’t the least bit surprised. “He never would have put up with this, would he?”

“You think I’m so selfish, that this is all about me? Those people needed guidance, and-”

“You treated them all like pawns, didn’t you? They were all distraught and shocked when Gamecube was gone, and you instantly rose up to console them all, your first act as their leader. And even though you considered yourself kind already, it wasn’t enough to earn you the right to rule. You needed a scapegoat. Someone who you could blame all your people’s troubles on, for the person who had shown them the true cause for their problems and lead the fight against them would hold absolute power for a very long time. You were awfully lucky you stumbled on the Segaricans, weren’t you.”

Walter wasn’t even trying to hide his true intentions anymore, which surely meant that he assumed we wouldn’t survive the night. “They were very well hidden, but I stumbled upon their dwelling about a month ago. I saw the obvious opportunity, and quickly I brought the men most loyal to me back to show what I had found. Once I had proven we weren’t alone, I convinced them that Lord Gamecube hadn’t died of disease at all, but some trickery of these people. They soon became certain that these people were out to destroy us, and all of our efforts went towards fighting them. Our first attack didn’t go well, and the more the Segarians defended against us the more certain my people became of their evil.”

“But as soon as people began to question whether or not what you were doing was right, you burned down the village and blamed it on the Segarians. You don’t even care who you’re the leader of as long as your king!”

Revolution and I were back to back, and for this whole time he had stayed still. Now I could feel him moving around, and from his tattered clothes he pulled out something that felt very cold when it brushed my arm. It didn’t take long to figure out what it was, and soon I could faintly hear him cutting away at his ties. I guessed I wasn’t the only one who sensed where this was going.

“But now it’s all over for you. I’m going to execute you in the middle of the town, and I will rule these people as long as I live.”

But I knew he already didn’t want to just lop our heads off while we were tied and weak, and a man this proud was easily swayed.

“You’re going to kill us yourself?” I asked, laughing. “All you ever have done is pulled the strings. You’d never be strong enough to kill us in cold blood. You’re weak, and you know it!”

Walters face contorted with rage. “I was an officer in the imperial army! I’ve killed more men in a day than you’ve even talked to in a lifetime! And nothing will stand in the way of my plans, nothing!” The fool was playing right into my hand.

“So you’re a big bad soldier now? Claims he killed so many people in combat, yet he has seven helpless prisoners and he can’t do more than talk.”

Walter drew his sword that hung from his waist. Not surprisingly, there wasn’t a hint of a bloodstain on it. “I could do it, right now. It’d be so easy, you know. I’m sure you’ve never even held a weapon in your pathetic life.”

“If you’re so confident, then why are you just going to kill us like this. Any many who was trying to act so great would give us a fighting chance. Strike me down in combat in the middle of the town square, and prove to your people that their leader can do more than talk.”

I could tell that Walter hated the idea of taking a suggestion from a man he was planning on killing, but now that the idea was out there, he couldn’t ignore it. Thankfully, his pride won over his common sense. Laughing, he cut my ties (Revolution hurriedly tried to make himself still appear bonded) and grabbed a second, rusty sword from the corner of the shack. Grabbing me roughly, he shoved the shack door open and dragged me towards the middle of town.

The crowd was still there, and at our appearance they divided to let us through. But once we had passed through them, they hurriedly followed. The people surrounded us on all sides, but they all kept their distance. It gave the effect that Walter and I were in a bubble, separated from the rest of the world.

It was still the dead of night, and no moon was visible in the sky. The only light in the entire forest came from the dim lanterns throughout town, and when we finally stopped and Walter turned to face me, I could hardly still see him.

Backing slowly away from me, he raised his blade. Mimicking him, a small part couldn’t believe how confident I was. He was right, after all. I had never held a sword in his life.

Even in the dim lighting, I could still tell that we were surrounded by the crowd. There was nowhere to run, no one to help me. I was on my own. But rather than feeling frightened, I felt more confident than ever. It was as if someone else was controlling my emotions, driving me to do things I would never normally do. Then, something in me finally clicked. How could I have ignored the truth this whole time?

It was the only logical explanation. The weird dream I had when I was in the coma, it wasn’t a dream at all.

I was so lost in my own thoughts, I hadn’t even noticed that Walter was addressing the crowd.

“-and this traitor and all other traitors will fall before me, tonight. None will stand in our way, for we are the strongest of all!” And the end of his speech the people roared, and he raised his blade even higher. As if on cue, all fell silent. The continued murmuring of the villagers, the sounds of the crickets, even the light rustling of the wind abruptly ended. For a moment, the world fell still. Then Walter quickly shifted his weight and lunged.

I could tell from the concentrated snarl on his face that he was going to run me through, and he was going to enjoy it. By the time I remembered to raise my own sword, Walter was almost upon me.


After all the talk in the shack, he was going to kill me without breaking stride…


TO BE CONTINUED
 

FFMMCLXIV

Smash Apprentice
Joined
Jun 25, 2007
Messages
94
Location
Virginia Beach, VA
WTF!!!! Cliffhanger...

Fantastic, take a break before you put out the next one. ;)

(Oh yeah, I did click your link to get here, but not by accident, I assure you.)
 

Dr. Robotnik

Smash Journeyman
Joined
Jun 5, 2007
Messages
462
same here i wanted to read a good fan fiction (although this would be pretty cool if it were real). and to top it off, not many people can write a good story. you can though and i am glad you wrote this, when possible, write the next scene.

P.S. i beefed up my story please grab a snack if you are about to read, it is quite longer than the first one.
 

Blackadder

Smash Master
Joined
Jun 17, 2007
Messages
3,164
Location
Purple
Aiyo.
Cute story...
Now to me, I usually don't bother reading a story if it has any form of serious fan-fic in it, as I despise the **** things. But yours, while using companies and consoles to represent nations and lords, is pretty good.

I my self woulden't have used them as such, rather make up my own names, but I'm not you, and it's all what you think.

Your story has some great details, and it seems to improve as you keep writing. That's great!

Also, with the "Chapter a day" thing you have going, I suggest you ease up a bit soon. I have a story thread myself, and I had a "Chapter a day" plan too. Eventually you'll find it to hard to keep up with, and the story may become flat. Just a suggestion, but wait for good inspiration and ideas before you jump in. (I myself got these tipspassed onto me from a net freind, and it's good advice.)

So..yeah. A lot of the story is good, and while I haven't read it all, Ima do that now. But from what I've got, It's good stuff mate!

Bah, I've finished it all now. Pretty cool stuff, all in all.
The "moderator" part rubbed off as a little corny for me though, but mostly great!

Heh, I voted the thread "4" btw. (;
 

Armagopalypse

Smash Journeyman
Joined
Aug 12, 2007
Messages
252
Location
Between the grahm and the 'mallow.
Aiyo.
Cute story...
Now to me, I usually don't bother reading a story if it has any form of serious fan-fic in it, as I despise the **** things. But yours, while using companies and consoles to represent nations and lords, is pretty good.

I my self woulden't have used them as such, rather make up my own names, but I'm not you, and it's all what you think.

Your story has some great details, and it seems to improve as you keep writing. That's great!

Also, with the "Chapter a day" thing you have going, I suggest you ease up a bit soon. I have a story thread myself, and I had a "Chapter a day" plan too. Eventually you'll find it to hard to keep up with, and the story may become flat. Just a suggestion, but wait for good inspiration and ideas before you jump in. (I myself got these tipspassed onto me from a net freind, and it's good advice.)

So..yeah. A lot of the story is good, and while I haven't read it all, Ima do that now. But from what I've got, It's good stuff mate!

Bah, I've finished it all now. Pretty cool stuff, all in all.
The "moderator" part rubbed off as a little corny for me though, but mostly great!

Heh, I voted the thread "4" btw. (;
Thanks for the review.

Lol, yeah. Personally I hated saying "Moderator" too, but it was the only video game reference I could think of that more or less fit the criteria. And yeah, I needed to add some corniness in somehow. Oh, and I only say chapter a day, because I know if I tell myself I'm going to get one done every day, I'll probably churn one out every two or three. If I would tell myself I was going to do it every three or four days, I'd have a new chapter every few weeks. Lol thats just how I work it seems.

For my first story, I think this is going pretty well. Hopefully, my next story will be a little bit better, and so on.
 

Armagopalypse

Smash Journeyman
Joined
Aug 12, 2007
Messages
252
Location
Between the grahm and the 'mallow.
Sorry 'bout the double posting, but I wanted to seperate this from my other post for neatness.

I'm sorry for the delay, but these last few days have been incredibly busy, and I barely had time to churn this out. At 840 words, this is about half the length of my typical chapter, but it seemed like a good place to break it off.

As a disclaimer, this is far darker than any other chapter I've written thusfar. So all you little kiddies need not apply.

August 14

Time seemed to slow down before Walter ran into me. I expecting my life to flash before my eyes or something, but then I noticed that everything had actually slowed down. The slight breeze seemed impossibly slow. Even though Walter was upon me, now he was only moving half as fast as before. His snarl on his face almost appeared funny now. I easily batted his blade aside, and then sidestepped to the right, causing him to stumble right past me. Then, it was like someone had flipped a switch. The whole world sped up again and Walter, who had been horribly off balance charging at me, was now flat on his face, with his sword stuck upright in the ground several feet away.

The crowd that had been jeering at shouting just a few seconds before now fell silent. I realized it must have appeared that I swatted him away as if he were just a fly. And, I thought with some amusement, I had.

Walter must have hit the ground fairly hard, because he was getting up very slowly. By the time he finally sat up, my blade was aimed right at his throat.

“It’s over, you’ve lost Walter,” I said. I pressed my sword harder against his throat, and a faint trickle of blood started to appear. “You were an horrible leader, yet even worse of a warrior.”

After all I had deduced of this man, I wouldn’t have thought twice of removing his head. But before I had a chance to do anything, a light voice cried out from behind me.

“NO!” Suddenly, I felt a sharp blow on the back of my head. Even though I was only dazed for a moment, it was long enough for Walter to roll to his feet and flee towards the woods, shoving any villagers aside that got in his way.

I didn’t care who or what was behind me. All I knew is that they had allowed Walter to escape, and that was enough. I quickly swirled around and slashed at whoever was behind me, and immediately the crowd of villagers gasped in shock.

On the ground lay a girl. She couldn’t have been any older than fourteen, and a huge gash started along her torso almost up to her lifeless eyes. I stared for a moment as blood began to darken her pale skin and blonde hair, and I could hear a small voice from inside my head.

What have you done? You monster, WHAT HAVE YOU DONE?

But I shoved the thought to the side. I had to catch up to Walter, or else this would all be for nothing! I dashed into the woods the same place as Walter had. As I passed, the villagers didn’t say anything or even turn to look at me. They were still all silently gawking at the body.

Somehow, I knew exactly where I was going, and soon I could hear obvious sounds through the trees. I had almost caught up to Walter. But still, even as I was running through the forest, the small voice refused to remain quiet.

You killed her, without even knowing who she was! You claim Walter a monster, but what does that make YOU?

I only did what is necessary.

Necessary? Since when is killing little girls after they hit you NECESSARY?!?

The mission is more important than any one person.

What mission? To kill anyone that so much as annoys you? This isn’t you, what have you become?


Soon I heard a loud crash from not too far ahead, and I didn’t have time for internal arguments anymore. Rushing ahead as fast as I could in the near darkness, I made out a figure lying sprawled on the ground, clutching their ankle and crying in pain.

Slowly I began to step forward. As soon as the figure realized I was there, it stopped crying out and stared at me. As I came closer and closer, I could make out a faint whimpering coming from it.

“You’re more trouble than your worth,” I muttered to the thing. Slowly I raised my weapon to the air and it began to become frantic, writhing in place and trying to move, to get away.

I had come too far for second thoughts, and a moment later I swiped as hard as I could at the pathetic thing. It made a slight gurgling sound, then collapsed onto the forest floor. I slammed my blade to the ground in triumph. Nothing could ruin my moment of victory.

But, suddenly, the euphoric feeling that had entered me while I was held prisoner left. Any thoughts I was previously having instantly vanished into the breeze.

All but that small voice inside my head.

My mind flashed to the mangled image of the girl in the village, and the man on the forest floor whom a dark pool now surrounded.




Without warning my knees gave out from beneath me, and I collapsed onto the ground, bawling…




TO BE CONTINUED



Comments (and especially reviews) are encouraged as always, both good and bad. :)
 

FFMMCLXIV

Smash Apprentice
Joined
Jun 25, 2007
Messages
94
Location
Virginia Beach, VA
Wow. Just...wow. Nice job.

That was dark, indeed. At least you didn't give me a cliffhanger this time, now I can be patient for the next chapter. Take your time.;)
 

Armagopalypse

Smash Journeyman
Joined
Aug 12, 2007
Messages
252
Location
Between the grahm and the 'mallow.
I greatly apologize for the delay. I promise this will be the longest I will ever take to write a chapter, but with the business that comes with the first week of school I didn't have time to sit down and put time it until today. So, without further blabbing, here's the next chapter.






What have I turned into?

No matter how hard I tried to clear my head, I couldn’t stop asking the same question over and over. If one of the Segaricans wasn’t holding onto my arm as we made our way to their village, I would’ve wandered off long ago. I was so distraught that I had barely been aware that the Segaricans had found me and…what was left of Walter. They had simply said that we were going back to their village, and dragged me off.

The man who was holding my arm whispered in my ear, “There’s no reason to be ashamed. You did what you had to do,”

But now I felt even worse, since I hadn’t needed to do this at all.

After a short while, we arrived at our destination. The sight was magnificent enough to pull me out of my stupor.

If you could ever call cabins art, this would be a masterpiece. Each of the cabins was fairly large and carefully built, and with what appeared to be touchups and expansions on many of them it appeared that people have been living here for a long time. As we continued through the town, I saw we were moving towards a large cabin. It was about as high as any other, but it was the size of five cabins put together.

Obviously, the Segarican man guiding me saw that I was staring at it. “We’ve expanded it recently,” he pointed out, “after the first attack. Now it can hold every single person in the town if need be.”

Of course, our arrival caused some commotion. People we’re cheering as we passed by, and they bunched behind us as we moved towards the gigantic cabin.

The scene was a twisted version of the events earlier this night. This town was the exact opposite of the Nintendonians.’

But even thinking about that village was a mistake, for the appalled faces of the villagers and the mangled girl on the ground filled my mind again. Suddenly, my shoes seemed far more interesting.

We quickly reached the huge building, and the man at the head of our party climbed the steps up and motioned for the crowd to Dissipate. After waiting a few moments for the crowd to obey, he rapped on the door. An elderly man peered out of the door. The sour expression on his face instantly changed when he looked at the back of our procession (I could guess what he was looking at, but I didn’t have it in me to look). One by one we entered the building.

It was one, humongous room. At the far end there was a huge banner which was adorned with what I could only guess was the Segarican coat of arms. Other than that, the room was vacant other than the table under the coat of arms. Around it seven men and three women were in deep conversation, but as we approached they each stopped and stared at us in turn. A bulky, light skinned man at the end of the table stood up and spoke.

“It appears you bring incredible news, Arthur. The tyrant has been uprooted for good, and maybe now we can finally bring peace again. This council was made so we wouldn’t repeat the mistakes of our former leader, but it appears we still couldn’t avert an all out war.”

He now turned to me. “And it appears we have you to thank, my friend. On the behalf of the council I think I can say that you have made this a great day for all.”

Every time someone congratulated me, it was thrusting another nail into my chest. I just wanted to get away. Maybe if I just had some time alone, I could clear my head.

“I’m afraid that regardless of what you’ve done, there are things we must discuss that are for our ears only. Perhaps you should stay with the others we found in the forest.”

I couldn’t really register what he meant by that, but soon I was being whisked away by two more Segarican man. I was led back outside the cabin, and as soon as I appeared the hovering crowd immediately started to move in. Before they could get too close, the men hastily threw me in another cabin a few dozen yards away. Quite frankly, I still felt like I was a prisoner.

In the darkness, it took me a second to realize who else was in the room.

In the opposite corner, the Segarican woman and her four men were all huddled in a circle. And on the other side of the room Revolution was staring and them with such enmity that it seemed he’d rather be anywhere else in the world.

As the door slammed closed behind me, they all jerked their gaze towards me.

“So it’s you is it. You’re friend proved very helpful in helping us escape,” the woman said, standing up. Although I had to be half a foot taller than her, she made me feel incredibly small.

I had decided not to speak another word that night, but for some reason the thought of not responding to her seemed impossible. “Did he now? Sounds like something he could do.” But from the look on his face Revolution was wishing he had left them behind. “Do you have any idea what’s going on?”

“You really have no clue, do you? That beast of a man your people took for a leader attacked us for no reason. We didn’t even have any idea your people existed before you attacked us.”

My mind flashed again to Walter’s current state, but I couldn’t afford another breakdown now.

“We wanted to make peace. After what we have done…in our past… we didn’t want a repeat. But he would have nothing of it. He continued to attack us, and of course we fought back, and soon we had nothing short of a full scale war. The only one we had ever known to take a boat ride was Walter himself, but from what we can gather the boat appeared to be yours. I’m sorry.”

“It doesn’t matter,” I cut in. “Now that Walter is...” My voice caught in my throat, and I had to take a deep breath before moving on. “What happens now?”

“Frankly, that’s for the council to decide. In my opinion, it appears that council is over. We cut off the head of the snake, now the rest is lifeless. But whatever they decide on, I will follow it to its full extent.”

She turned back to her fellows, and it appeared that our conversation was over. But there was still one question still lingering in my mind, and I had to ask it.

“Im sorry, but…what’s your name?”

“She slowly turned back to me, her jet black armor reflecting the light coming from a crack in the door.








“My name is Juliet. But I am known simply as the Twilight Princess.”







TO BE CONTINUED
 

SuperLinkBrothers

Smash Ace
Joined
Jun 26, 2007
Messages
513
Location
Hyrule...OF COURSE!
YAY!!!
Juliet????? Um, ok, whatever, it still involves Legend Of Zelda...

Well, sorry I haven't posted in a while, well, if you are reading my two stories then you would know why I haven't been around, but in any case, Im still reading, so, Im here, this is actully a cliff-hanger for me, because I recentley beat Twilight Princess, so, um, I guess you did too, wow, this is wierd, anyway, I'll try to stop being so pyscho about one of the best games ever!(Noting can beat Brawl, or at least I hope)
Alright, hasta luego, uh, I mean see you later, sorry, currentley learning Spanish, lol.
 

Dr. Robotnik

Smash Journeyman
Joined
Jun 5, 2007
Messages
462
So let me guess, this guy could not finish his story either. tisk tisk, it was a good story to.
 

FFMMCLXIV

Smash Apprentice
Joined
Jun 25, 2007
Messages
94
Location
Virginia Beach, VA
so you are saying this guy failed to make 2 stories. Man, and he criticized me for writing to much on my story. tisk tisk again.
Nonononono, you misunderstand. I meant "seconded" as in repeating what you said. AFAIK, this is the only story he's abandoned. And who knows, he may come back and finish it sometime.

Nevertheless, very disappointing.
 

Dr. Robotnik

Smash Journeyman
Joined
Jun 5, 2007
Messages
462
Nonononono, you misunderstand. I meant "seconded" as in repeating what you said. AFAIK, this is the only story he's abandoned. And who knows, he may come back and finish it sometime.

Nevertheless, very disappointing.
ya, either way, i really like this story and wanted to read the end of it, it would be like reading 6 of the 7 harry potter books and than before the 7th is finished, the auther dies.

thats my analogy, whats yours.
 
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