When it comes to approaching unsafely with SHFFL Fairs or something on shield you there's no secret trick for the mental side. I've seen people ask how to get over that kind of thing when it really comes down to mental reminders and determination. To answer your question though, you need to limit yourself from these approaches so you can explore other options. So, force yourself to avoid using Fair as much as an approach and make it more of a swatting/spacing tool. When you are thinking to yourself that you want to approach try to only consider the option of dash into Dtilt poke, wavedash>Dtilt, or dash dance grabbing. This practice will also open up your game to a more fundamental playstyle and teach tech chasing/followups as well as thinking more based on reads rather than reaction.