My journey to self-improvement

[altairian]

Link to original post: [drupal=2538]My journey to self-improvement[/drupal]



A little bit of background on myself:
I'm 25 years old. I live in my dad's house, with my older brother. Out of high school I got in to a very good college, went for 3 years and got kicked out for poor performance (I never liked school in the first place, and didn't like my major at all so I didn't attend classes). After college I spent 2 years doing nothing but playing World of Warcraft. At this point, I finally get my first job, at 23.

Soon after, I meet a girl playing WoW. I end up completely falling for her, but somehow stuck as "just friends" despite being closer to her than I've been to anyone. Lots of sissy behavior by me ensues, until I get an opportunity to move to California, which I take because I finally grew up enough to want to be independent. Long story short there, the girl and I stop talking soon after I move (she lived about 1.5 hours from the place I moved to in CA and we hung out once after I moved), and after 8 months in CA I'm broke and desperate and depressed, so I move back home, get my old job back and here I am almost a year later.

Kudos to anyone that actually bothers reading all that, but if you didn't, I'm getting to the point now

My goals right now are (in no particular order):

-Move out, probably getting an apartment with my brother

-Get better at meeting new people

-Get ranked on the NYS and Pikachu PR lists

-Place top 8 in a 20+ man tournament

-Get the phone number of a girl I've just met

-Lose my virginity

-Find a better source of income than my current job, or a supplement to it

-Become a more open person, with my friends and my family

-Lead a healthier lifestyle (eating healthier, exercising, all the good stuff)

-Organize local tournaments

Starting today, I'm going to try to take one step forward every day toward these goals. I have ideas/plans in mind for reaching each of these goals but I haven't committed to them yet. For getting better at smash I'm going to be playing lots of wifi (friendlies anyone?) due to the lack of smash community in my area. For my income I'm looking at online affiliate marketing right now, but I'd definitely welcome more suggestions in that department. And most importantly to me, as far as meeting new people and specifically women is concerned, I'm going to be using David DeAngelo's ebook and his programs to learn all of the things that I never learned naturally as I was growing up, or was taught incorrectly.

On a little side note here, I've already gone fairly deep in to David D's stuff and it's truly remarkable the amount of knowledge he has - he deals largely with the psychology around attraction, with focus both on your own thought/behavior, as well as that of women - and I'm more than happy to discuss what I've already learned with people. I'll be committing myself to daily reading/watching more of his stuff from this point forward so if anyone is interested in him in particular or just wants to talk about understanding women better, let me know!

In order to help me accomplish these goals and self-improvement in general I'm using this blog because I've never been a highly self-motivated person. A few years ago the thought of going and doing even the simplest thing on my own was nearly paralyzing. So I need help, in the form of well wishes and talking to people who either just want to help or perhaps share one or many of my goals.

I'll be posting updates in this blog and new blogs as significant events happen in my journey. To anyone that read this far, thank you! Feel free to comment/ask questions, I'm happy to discuss any part of what I've written =)

 

[Pyrostormer]

I enjoyed reading this blog.

Much respect and good luck.

 

[altairian]

Thanks Pyro! =)

I edited in a couple more goals that I forgot about as I was writing, I'm pretty sure that covers everything now >_>

 

[Atlus8]

Going to college out of high school sux b@lls! Got out of it after 2 years, but my grades/attendance were fine! One day, I just said "Screw this" and walked out of the class . . . it felt so f***en great!

 

[SuSa]

"-Lose my virginity"

May I ask why? It's.... really not that great to lose. :x

I'd actually suggest waiting and at least make your first time mean something.

I regret my first time. :/

 

[altairian]

I didn't mean that as "go get laid by anyone". If that were my intent then I'd certainly hope I could have accomplished that by now >_>

I'm not sure how old you are so I don't want to seem like I'm talking down to you, but your perspective on things definitely changes as you get older. When I was in high school and college I definitely felt like yes, I should wait for that "special someone" to come along. Well since I never left my own little bubble (...or pussied out majorly on it one time, but that's a story in itself), that never happened. And now to me sex is just sex, and while I'm not gonna go just do it with any random chick, I'm not going to wait months in to a relationship to move things forward either.

Trust me, being a 25 year old virgin is not a great feeling. It took me a long time to get to the point that I no longer feel ashamed of myself for lacking that experience at this point in my life, and I partially threw it in there like that because that's the first time I've ever really said to anyone straight up that I am in fact a virgin. =\

@Atlus: good for you for seizing some control in your life. Just because it's what you're "supposed" to do doesn't make it right for everyone. Hope everything's working out well for you!

 

[Teran]

I've always found the "losing it to someone special" notion to be a load of baloney. Adding all this weight of expectation to your first time, which will pretty much suck regardless, is dumb. No, you practice and practice so when it comes to the "special someone", you can take them to heaven and back.

Heh, amateurs.

 

[Technodeath]

how can you make everything bad or not, make sense.

WTB your brain Teran

like yourself Altairian, i have a fair few goals to accomplish.
- Get better at brawl, and place in a podium position in a tournament
- Learn to be able to trust more people, i dont talk to anyone about anything, tell them anything personal such as details

one of my bigger goals would be to promote a smash scene in the mid west of Western Australia, even if it doesnt get bigger than 20-30 people.. i dont really give a crap. i just want to see people who share the same enthusiasm i do towards Smash Bros whether it be Melee or Brawl

other than that it's the cliche stuff of wanting a successful career, find a nice woman, have a nice house etc etc

either way good luck on your endeavors Altair

 

[altairian]

Those are good goals Techno =)
I know exactly what you mean with the second one. I have extreme difficulty being open about myself with just about everyone. When I was younger I honestly believed that nobody would like me if they actually knew me so I just kept my mouth shut most of the time. I've grown out of that (mostly =\ ) but it's still difficult for me to bring up personal subjects unless I'm asked directly.

Good luck to you, and don't be afraid to take advantage of the anonymity of the internet to help you get used to talking about yourself more

@Teran: I know what you're saying, but the way you word it kind of makes you sound like you sleep around. lol

 

[SuSa]

I've always found the "losing it to someone special" notion to be a load of baloney. Adding all this weight of expectation to your first time, which will pretty much suck regardless, is dumb. No, you practice and practice so when it comes to the "special someone", you can take them to heaven and back.

Heh, amateurs.

I never said your first time wouldn't suck.

What I'm saying, is don't make it something you'd regret.

Like having your first time be with your ex from 2 years ago.

 

[Teran]

@Teran: I know what you're saying, but the way you word it kind of makes you sound like you sleep around. lol

I was a pretty charged up teenager, if you catch my drift.

 

[altairian]

I was a pretty charged up teenager, if you catch my drift.

:embarrass

And Susa, don't beat yourself up too much, you're only human

 

[3747373796432]

For being open, I'd say always take the chance to be with people. In other words, be generous with your time, you never know who you might meet out of a break in routine.

 

[altairian]

I already am a pretty generous person, tbh. I can't recall a single time I've said no when someone's asked me for help with something, really. Part of my problem is I have very few friends outside of the internet, and they're all people I work with so it's rare that I do anything with them outside of work since we see each other so much to begin with.

A bit of an update, last night I was listening to the two cd's from David Deangelo's interview series that I have, and I learned quite a bit from them. I'm probably going to go back and listen to them again in like a week or so to help stuff sink in. One thing that one of the guys said that I'm going to be working on incorporating in to my life is "always err on the side of action". He went on to say that basically you don't regret taking actions, what you'll regret is not taking an action. While I don't think it's quite that black and white, my biggest regrets are definitely things that I DIDN'T do, so I feel like it's good advice =)

My first step toward that, I just got back from the mall and I was playing a bit of DDR while I was there, and there was a new girl working at the arcade that was watching me and told me I was really good and such while I was playing. So after I finished I caught my breath and actually walked up to her and talked to her for a few minutes. Normally I would have just left without saying anything other than "thanks", so it's a step in the right direction

 

[~automatic]

Small talk is always great. When someone compliments you (like the girl at the arcade) ice breakers are very easy to pull out imo.

The way I see it (correct me if I'm wrong) since some of your goals involve people and relations and all that stuff as you master a goal the other objectives on your list should be easier to do since the stuff you plan to do isn't that much different from other stuff on your list.

As far as smash goes you have pretty much the best resource for getting your Pika in shape. Ask stuff in the Pika boards, look at your older replays and practice. As pikachu mains we have to stick together and step it up collectively.

Spoiler

Anther can't do it all.

I've always found the "losing it to someone special" notion to be a load of baloney. Adding all this weight of expectation to your first time, which will pretty much suck regardless, is dumb. No, you practice and practice so when it comes to the "special someone", you can take them to heaven and back.

Heh, amateurs.

I remember my 1st time was also the girl's 1st so it was it bad (lol) it did help us come closer so it was definitely special, I can't lie about that. After we broke up I just started seing sex as biology and not really caring about the other if it happened outside of a relationship. I know that sounds cold but everyone is entitled to an opinion based on what they have been through. I would say most people shouln't worry about that type of stuff. If it happens while two people are drunk it happens if it happens with someone that is truly special let it happen.

Well Alt that's my imput on your blog. I'm positive you can reach your goals and go beyond them.

 

[altairian]

I've had a super frustrating few days in smash. I just can't seem to win. I've taken decent players to last stock high % only to end up losing because I can't get that last hit. I lose to c-stick spamming foxes and wolfs. I'm starting to feel like I'll never be able to play at even an average level among the competitive players =(

I think I'm gonna take a break for a couple days and hopefully be able to perform better once I get back in to it =\