Ok Crimson King, I 've finished reading your piece and it was good, but I have some issues with it.
First, in the beginning your character says all the main character wanted for his/her 13th birthday is to learn to shave, but then you say the manin character is's 17 later on, so my confusion draws from trying to understand whether the main character is 13 telling the story a little after his 13th birthday or is the main character is 17 drawing on the past. If the latter of the two is correct, why at 17 is the main character recalling this story? Also you then state later the main character is about 6 years old when the father goes into his period of yelling and getting angry, while the mother just goes with the grain, so to speak. That does not seem to follow chronologically with your story if the main character is 13 or 17.
Second, ok i understand the chronologically now, but it appears that it could become an issue, since you throw age around alot, be careful with that.
Third, you've got a lot of negative words in there (never, no, couldn't wouldn't, etc.) and I would recommend trying to make those positive words. For example:
YOU WROTE:
She never cared when they called to report my misbehaving because to her, I was flawless
I SUGGEST:
She appeared unconcerned when the school reported my misbehavings. To my mother, I was flawless.
Normally I wouldn't break it into two sentences but you get the idea. The Elements of Style suggests that this suggestion I made is proper practice and makes for a smoother read.
Fourth, write out the numbers in words, dont switch between the actual numbers and words, just use words.
Fifth, this sentence: "Her mother’s last wisdom would perhaps survive another generation. " needs to be rewritten.
The parallels between shaving and the relationship of the parents are very good and original, but at times I feel it was slightly forced, but I thought it was very original. Rather than "The Perfect Shave" for a title, I recommend perhaps, "A Clean Shave" or "Cleanly Shaven". That is up to you though. I was expecting a different ending, something like the main character takes the steps for a proper shave to slice her wrists due to being emotionally scarred by her parents relationship or something along those lines, but the ending was a surprise, I am not sure if it was the best ending for the tale, I feel like it lacked significance.
Don't get me wrong, the ending is beautiful and very appealing and pulls on the heart strings, but I just think it would better in a different piece. Actually, its not some much the ending as it is the tone of the story. The tone of the story reads as something sad, depressing and perhaps at times anger filled, but then this very sweet ending comes out of no where, I dont know, maybe I'm wrong but I just dont think it works well. In my mind, if the tone is sad it should be reflected all the way through.
If the ending was meant to shock me, I am sorry to say it did not.
I think you really have something here with the parallels of shaving and the family, and that alone makes this piece very well written, outside of the other things I pointed out. I guess my major critiques are the chronology, which does at first seem confusing and the ending. I like the ending, but I don't think it fits the story that well, though you did work it in there very nicely.
Good work Crimson King, I'll have my actually scores for you when the judging process beings.