6. You're expecting too much too fast. As I like to tell a lot of new players, if Smash 4 is your first Smash game, you're probably not going to be that good at it. With every generation, the top players are usually the people who just started to climb through the ranks in the first game they took seriously or have been serious players for a freakishly long time. Most of the best Brawl players were people who started on Melee, and most of the best SSB4 players are people who started with Brawl/Project M. This said, if you're not ranking in tournaments right now, you probably won't until late in the cycle of the current game or until the next game if you still care (or can afford to care).
Let's face it, past the age of 25 it's pretty hard to care about competitive gaming thanks to daily responsibilities so it is kind of a countdown with people's "prime" typically being their early 20's. Me, for instance, I've been playing Smash since the original but Brawl was the first one I took seriously. I was 21 when Brawl came out so I was already significantly late to the party because the best players usually get their start at 15/16. If you're not this young right now or got your start past this point, you're probably already sunk, so to speak. Past the age of 25, it's kind of like Slow Pitch Softball leagues but that isn't to say it isn't fun, just don't expect to not get hilariously destroyed if you venture out to anything besides tournaments at your local game/hobby shop.
I appreciate you put in the 5th point because, as a community, everyone can't be high ranking players and people simply have to take on different roles. I like to research characters and study match ups and, in an ironic way, it's not all that different from how my dad studies baseball stats but I'm okay with that. Just because you're not winning EVO doesn't mean you can't contribute in some way to the community and I think some people get too hung on just ranking in tournaments to think that their opinions matter.