Looks Don't Matter?

[Teran]

From an early age, we are indoctrinated by society with the notion that looks don't matter when we seek a partner.

They say it's the emotional, not physical side that's truly important, but is this really plausible? Before we are the spiritual, higher beings we make ourselves out to be, we are animals. We have a base instinct to seek out a partner that we believe will provide strong, viable, and fertile offspring.

We are tuned to acknowledge the physical attraction, so, would it not be more true to say that a physical attraction must exist for a truly successful relationship?

Discuss!

I want to hear a few opinions first, and based on those I may start throwing science stuff at you.

 

[|RK|]

For many people, that would be quite correct, but it does not apply to everyone as you make it out to be. There are still a vast amount of people who have relationships based on intelligence and knowledge. These don't come quite as easily or quickly, but these relationships still do exist. No physical attraction is necessary. To state that is just silly.

 

[Evil Eye]

Teran, if you're starting a debate, you should post all your information and proofs into the OP to build your caseline. Deliberately watering down your overall case just so you can have a slambang rebuttal is bad debating, and a tad bit manipulative for a non-competitive debating forum.

And I'd like to point out that there are differences between aesthetic (looks) attraction and animal attraction. Trust me, flip open one of those People magazine sexiest [gender] articles and you're going to find a few people that are shooting blanks, or have low fertility, or what have you.

 

[pacmansays]

Looks do matter, it's undeniable that looks don't have an impact on your status in society: studies have shown people assume those with good looks are more sincere, friendly, funny and caring than someone considered ugly who be project bad qualities onto. However, the looks are of course no evidence for a persons personality. It's also found that people considered good looking do better financially than those who don't.

It's almost undeniable that good looks help and can matter, the question is should they matter?

As mentioned previously, looks in no way suggest or guarantee who that person is. Consider the case of Susan Boyle on Britain's Got Talent recently, no one expected her to do well partly due to her looks and dress sense but as shown it didn't matter if she was ugly because she was a phenomenal singer.

A good way to look at appearance's importance is from an evolutionary standpoint: if good looking people are getting more interest then there's got to be a relation between good looks and good genes. In a sense looks do not affect the quality of your genes and people are often found to be attracted to and marry those of equal attraction to them. But certain qualities regarding looks are related to healthy genes: wide hips on women increase the chance of successful childbirth, tanned people lack many defects in genes which in the wild aren't useful, tall men are physically more imposing and stronger generally.

But how do you explain beautiful people going for very ugly people. If we look at these cases we can find often other underlying reasons for it to be evolutionarily better to have children with them. Often these men have other things like a brilliant personality or are socially well off. This is great because it allows their children to be brought up in a healthy and good environment.

So do looks matter? They can, and they can play an important matter but there are other equally important factors that play a role. So unless you want to lead a Hollywood film then don't put too much emphasis on it

 

[~ARES]

Looks do matter, it's undeniable that looks don't have an impact on your status in society: studies have shown people assume those with good looks are more sincere, friendly, funny and caring than someone considered ugly who be project bad qualities onto. However, the looks are of course no evidence for a persons personality. It's also found that people considered good looking do better financially than those who don't.

It's almost undeniable that good looks help and can matter, the question is should they matter?

As mentioned previously, looks in no way suggest or guarantee who that person is. Consider the case of Susan Boyle on Britain's Got Talent recently, no one expected her to do well partly due to her looks and dress sense but as shown it didn't matter if she was ugly because she was a phenomenal singer.

A good way to look at appearance's importance is from an evolutionary standpoint: if good looking people are getting more interest then there's got to be a relation between good looks and good genes. In a sense looks do not affect the quality of your genes and people are often found to be attracted to and marry those of equal attraction to them. But certain qualities regarding looks are related to healthy genes: wide hips on women increase the chance of successful childbirth, tanned people lack many defects in genes which in the wild aren't useful, tall men are physically more imposing and stronger generally.

But how do you explain beautiful people going for very ugly people. If we look at these cases we can find often other underlying reasons for it to be evolutionarily better to have children with them. Often these men have other things like a brilliant personality or are socially well off. This is great because it allows their children to be brought up in a healthy and good environment.

So do looks matter? They can, and they can play an important matter but there are other equally important factors that play a role. So unless you want to lead a Hollywood film then don't put too much emphasis on it

Good post, pacman! You're right, many of the attributes we find physically attractive do have evolutionary and purposeful roots; women with large hips for baring children, men chasing young females for their reproductive potential, etc. This might still matter in some parts of the world, too, but what about in societies where survival isn't an active concern?

From a non-evolutionary stand-point in, say, America, looks still do matter. People deemed attractive will get the "second look", and have a positive first opinion when meeting someone new. Of course, this opinion will change when they open their mouth and one starts to gauge intelligence or status, but attractiveness plays a role in first impressions. At this angle, looks will increase your chances in attracting or repelling a potential partner, but only in this very first step. After that hook, attractiveness will still matter (and variably to how much they care about attractiveness), but to a lesser extent. Now they will subconsciously begin ascertaining these other aspects sought for in a partner, and your looks become one factor among many.

 

[DyceDarg]

(In addition to ~ARES's post...too lazy to quote, and there's no need for a pagefiller....)

There are a lot of things through evolution that have caused us to subconsciously be attracted to the opposite sex more. For instance, (as you stated) women with wider hips are seen as more apt for bearing children. Women with larger breasts are also more fertile. On the men's side, the only facts that I know are that broader shoulders is generally a sign of higher levels of testosterone, and a squarer jaw makes for a more aggressive appearance. I also agree with your statement about the 'second look' thing, but I feel like the attractiveness still plays a large factor after 'the hook' that you mentioned.

Summed up: In my personal opinion, looks do matter, FOR EVERYONE. It just varies from person to person.

 

[Purple]

I always wondered how looks particularly matter. I think they always do in the sense of how your body is shaped, not your facial features. However shouldn't everyone be potentially looking for the same thing considering we're all the same form of 'animal'?

All men should be looking for women with wide hips and large breasts (which haha, ironically a great deal of us do now that i think about it), and women look for men with larger muscles and a more intimidating form.

So how to women get with skinnier men, or men get with skinnier women? Would anyone considering this a thought defect? Should a person be considered closer to their animal instinct for their lust for thicker women or lust for stronger men?

Looks matter in the ideal of how you were raised. Being raised in a society where you're well off, very fit and intelligent, and taught to think before you act, will make you look for a woman or man of your caliber, practically washing away all of your primal instinct, instead of looking for a woman with semi-chubby woman who can bear children well.

If you've noticed, i haven't talked much about the women or man's face as in looks.

Reason being i don't feel that their actual facial appearance matters. But instead their facial structure. A woman having a manly face isn't 'ugly' but instead intimidating to a man. Which will pull them away.

I felt like a just rambled a bunch of nonsense, so for the most part i'm saying is this.

Your body matters much more than your 'looks' and a woman with larger hips and bigger breasts will find herself more attractive to middle-class men . However it won't matter to someone who has lost their animal instinct through constant training from their family. (like a tamed animal) or a higher class man who feels that she isn't up to par..

 

[pacmansays]

All men should be looking for women with wide hips and large breasts (which haha, ironically a great deal of us do now that i think about it), and women look for men with larger muscles and a more intimidating form.

So how to women get with skinnier men, or men get with skinnier women? Would anyone considering this a thought defect? Should a person be considered closer to their animal instinct for their lust for thicker women or lust for stronger men?
[/B]

Don't mean to toot my own horn but look at my post above about how there are other factors that matter as much as looks but have the same underlying factor

 

[ANTi_]

People prefer to have an attractive partner just to show them off. I agree that the best partners are usually one's who has the better personality over looks.

 

[Purple]

Don't mean to toot my own horn but look at my post above about how there are other factors that matter as much as looks but have the same underlying factor

you tooted pretty hard pacmansays, i actually related my post off of yours XD.

@anti- so would you say someone who is physically unattractive you would be attracted to by how they act?

 

[pacmansays]

you tooted pretty hard pacmansays, i actually related my post off of yours XD.

@anti- so would you say someone who is physically unattractive you would be attracted to by how they act?

Hahahaha

I'd like to add that looks do matter a little, there's a friend of mine who emotionally has got what I want but I just do not find her physically attractive which does matter. But for me physical attractiveness is just not whether someone is good looking or not, its something you feel anyway (she smokes: my biggest turnoff)

 

[ANTi_]

you tooted pretty hard pacmansays, i actually related my post off of yours XD.

@anti- so would you say someone who is physically unattractive you would be attracted to by how they act?

But we are not all looking to date Medusa just because she is a nice person. Some people just want a good looking girl friend, But if she has a bad personality it's a major turnoff

 

[Dark.Pch]

Sadly they do. or else most people these days would not have so much trouble finding a love one. Most care about looks then personality. Some one can not be all that attractive but is a nice and just the person for them. But won't wanna get with them.

While someone else is attractive but is not really a cool person and hardly have anything in common. But the boy/girl would settle for that. It's crazy and messed up. But that's human life. Looks is mostly the #1 priority in a persons mind when wanting someone. Not everying in this world can be attractive. So it's not fair for people to get turned down like that, really when they are nice people.

But the way I see it, if one does not like you cause or your looks, that person is seriously a waste of time. Not worth a tear. This also shows that they just don't really care about you. And with that, you know not to be sad. Not care and move on. you did nothing wrong. And also remember some people are more on personality then looks.

 

[pacmansays]

I'd like to point out there is a difference between being attractive and having good looks, attractiveness is a feeling you get from someone and it isn't soley based on looks. Attractiveness is the biggest factor but it is not looks: its personality, status, sense of humour etc.

 

[Dark.Pch]

I'd like to point out there is a difference between being attractive and having good looks, attractiveness is a feeling you get from someone and it isn't soley based on looks. Attractiveness is the biggest factor but it is not looks: its personality, status, sense of humour etc.

Sadly in life, that's not how most of the world sees it. Who it comes to being attractive to a person, it is mostly about your looks. And that is what most people in the world seem to want more then the more important things that would make a relationship last for life.

Hahahaha

I'd like to add that looks do matter a little, there's a friend of mine who emotionally has got what I want but I just do not find her physically attractive which does matter. But for me physical attractiveness is just not whether someone is good looking or not, its something you feel anyway (she smokes: my biggest turnoff)

And this is what is messed up. Just cause you don't fine her physically attractive, does not mean she should be blown off. That seems what you did. Looks don't matter for the reason that while you don't like how she looks, someone else might not care how she looks and like her for the human being that she is

Looks are not gonna hold a relation ship together. You won't know what you have in common. You can be with a girl who looks hawt but she is total jerk or just plane w/e. you guys have lil to nothing in common. But you wanna be with her cause of her looks, you really don't care about her to begin with. Or got to know her like that. First thing that came to mind was "Damm, she looks freaking hawt, I'd hit that. I want her so bad"

Yet people would by pass a girl who has things in common with them, really sweet and a great personality all because she does not look all that attractive with physical appearance. They just throw away so many good things for one thing that they wanted but did not get. Was it really worth it?

Looks don't matter. people make it matter. But the good thing it, Not all people are about looks, but what is past it. THUS, Looks don't matter since not everyone does not care for it. To me if a girl looks attractive, that is a bonus with the other stuff I fell in love with past that.

 

[pacmansays]

And this is what is messed up. Just cause you don't fine her physically attractive, does not mean she should be blown off. That seems what you did. Looks don't matter for the reason that while you don't like how she looks, someone else might not care how she looks and like her for the human being that she is

If you want a relationship with someone you need physical attractiveness otherwise you simply have platonic love that won't work. Attractiveness is wanting to kiss them, wanting to hold them etc it isn't based on looks. The girl mentioned smokes and does drugs which personally I find repulsive however she isn't ugly. Her personality is great though and that's why she'll be a friend to me.

My girlfriend however, I do find very attractive and I love being with her. Some friends have told me that she isn't generally the best looking person but has lots of men attracted to her somehow as with another female friend of mine. However, aspects of their personality such as being approachable, funny and kind make them attractive and often views form out of that.

 

[Purple]

If you want a relationship with someone you need physical attractiveness otherwise you simply have platonic love that won't work. Attractiveness is wanting to kiss them, wanting to hold them etc it isn't based on looks. The girl mentioned smokes and does drugs which personally I find repulsive however she isn't ugly. Her personality is great though and that's why she'll be a friend to me.

My girlfriend however, I do find very attractive and I love being with her. Some friends have told me that she isn't generally the best looking person but has lots of men attracted to her somehow as with another female friend of mine. However, aspects of their personality such as being approachable, funny and kind make them attractive and often views form out of that.

Basically saying, you'll be able to be friends with them, but you can't really force yourself to be in a relationship just because of how they act towards you, you have to have the impulse to want to do 'things' with them whether it would be kiss them, hold them, have sexual relations with them, whatever. It's needed.

The problem with relationships is that men tend to only go off of these impulses (which in all honesty is natural, it's our instinct to go off of these instincts) However these instincts only give us lust, not love.

 

[pacmansays]

Basically saying, you'll be able to be friends with them, but you can't really force yourself to be in a relationship just because of how they act towards you, you have to have the impulse to want to do 'things' with them whether it would be kiss them, hold them, have sexual relations with them, whatever. It's needed.

The problem with relationships is that men tend to only go off of these impulses (which in all honesty is natural, it's our instinct to go off of these instincts) However these instincts only give us lust, not love.

Yes, exactly! We need to have a physical attraction to them though this may not only be based on looks. When this attraction is solely based on appearance (which can happen) then the relationship will fail unless of course its a short fling.

My friends have great personalities in my opinion, even my male ones and some are considered good looking, but I have no physical attraction to them and so I know I'm heterosexual. If I feel an attraction towards a female acquantice I know I want to be more than just friends with them. Without physical attraction then it is just a friendship and despite all good relationships need to be built on friendship they will never reach beyond that unless there is a physical attraction to the person.

 

[.Marik]

Looks are a prime motivator for sexual attractiveness and reproduction.

Personality simply isn't enough in most cases. If we're not attracted, we simply don't want to be intimate with another individual. This is especially the case with men.

Now, we don't mean to be rude and brush ugly women/men off, but it's usually just primary instinct and wanting to find a physically attractive mate. People may hide/manipulate their feelings for financial intentions, but that's beside the point.

Sure, looks and great personality is every person's dream. They usually aren't extreme in both aspects in many cases, but we take what we can get. Bluntly put, personality really isn't that important in the ACTUAL process of reproduction, becoming sexually aroused and mating is. Intellect/personality is usually a secondary want.

After being with a mate for an extended period of time, even if the partner grows old, a couple will still remain together due to what we call "love". If a mating couple had children together, went through several hardships together, and raised offspring together, the relationship is going to be very intimate and they will feel closure with being one another, and they will have bonded on a positive and loving manner.

But, that still comes back to my point. Before bonding sexually and emotionally, they had to have some form of being sexually attracted to one another, whether it was mainly due to looks, or mainly due to personality, with average/personality being a secondary factor. They most likely go hand in hand, no long-term relationship is going to be successful because of amazing looks, no personality traits that are likable, or intellect and personality, but they're downright ugly.

As I said before, this may not be 100% accurate, but rather, an assumption based off of instinct and want, even if we can't get that particular individual to mate with us.

You take the best you can get, but I'm sure we've all had fantasies of men/women which we'll never get, but the instinct remains regardless.

So there you have my opinion; looks do matter.

 

[Dark.Pch]

If you want a relationship with someone you need physical attractiveness otherwise you simply have platonic love that won't work. Attractiveness is wanting to kiss them, wanting to hold them etc it isn't based on looks. The girl mentioned smokes and does drugs which personally I find repulsive however she isn't ugly. Her personality is great though and that's why she'll be a friend to me.

My girlfriend however, I do find very attractive and I love being with her. Some friends have told me that she isn't generally the best looking person but has lots of men attracted to her somehow as with another female friend of mine. However, aspects of their personality such as being approachable, funny and kind make them attractive and often views form out of that.

That is false. As I said before, there are people who could not care about looks (thank god) Those looks are not everything and are not needed. One girl does not like a guy cause of his looks, but is a good dude? Ok, she is not worth a breath. Another girl could not care how one looks and wanna be with the dude cause of the kind of person he is.

Looks only matter to people who just can't see themselves with a person who is not attractive to them, like it is a must or the relationship is bad.

Yes, exactly! We need to have a physical attraction to them though this may not only be based on looks. When this attraction is solely based on appearance (which can happen) then the relationship will fail unless of course its a short fling.

My friends have great personalities in my opinion, even my male ones and some are considered good looking, but I have no physical attraction to them and so I know I'm heterosexual. If I feel an attraction towards a female acquantice I know I want to be more than just friends with them. Without physical attraction then it is just a friendship and despite all good relationships need to be built on friendship they will never reach beyond that unless there is a physical attraction to the person.

No you don't, Looks don't don't keep a relationship strong. What you have in common and how the person is in general is what matters and holds a relationship. If you was to go for all these hawt girls then find out she was a total spaz later, You would not stay with her. Unless you like getting treated like dirt just to have a girl that is hawt and feel good about yourself for it.

I have wanted to be with girls who people say are not all that attractive. But her looks is not what made me fall in love with them. it was their personality and the many things we had in common. The fact that there is lots of people like me who could care less about how attractive one is is the reason looks don't mean anything. Looks only matter to people that just want too much and have some wierd pride in them. How a person is holds the love between man and woman. Not looks.

 

[pacmansays]

That is false. As I said before, there are people who could not care about looks (thank god) Those looks are not everything and are not needed. One girl does not like a guy cause of his looks, but is a good dude? Ok, she is not worth a breath. Another girl could not care how one looks and wanna be with the dude cause of the kind of person he is.

Looks only matter to people who just can't see themselves with a person who is not attractive to them, like it is a must or the relationship is bad.



No you don't, Looks don't don't keep a relationship strong. What you have in common and how the person is in general is what matters and holds a relationship. If you was to go for all these hawt girls then find out she was a total spaz later, You would not stay with her. Unless you like getting treated like dirt just to have a girl that is hawt and feel good about yourself for it.

I have wanted to be with girls who people say are not all that attractive. But her looks is not what made me fall in love with them. it was their personality and the many things we had in common. The fact that there is lots of people like me who could care less about how attractive one is is the reason looks don't mean anything. Looks only matter to people that just want too much and have some wierd pride in them. How a person is holds the love between man and woman. Not looks.

You still have to understand that when I refer to attractiveness I do not refer to looks specifically: being physically attracted to someone does not mean that the person is good looking or you think they are but being attracted to someone means wanting to kiss, be close to, be intimite with and be physical with the person.

Physical attraction can be as much as due to personality as it is to looks. There are probably multiple reasons why you find someone attractive and looks aren't necessarily one factor of it. Take for example Chris Evans marrying Billie Piper (if you're not British search them up on google): her being extremely beautiful and him very ugly but they had a physical attraction to each other and both have said that their personalities are a part of it.

A relationship will fail if you realise you are only attracted by one aspect of them: just looks suggests that it is lust, just personality means that a physical relationship can never be had and just money or power will only last as long as the two factors last.

Below are Billie Piper and Chris Evans

Chris Evans

Billie Piper

 

[Purple]

That is false. As I said before, there are people who could not care about looks (thank god) Those looks are not everything and are not needed. One girl does not like a guy cause of his looks, but is a good dude? Ok, she is not worth a breath. Another girl could not care how one looks and wanna be with the dude cause of the kind of person he is.

Looks only matter to people who just can't see themselves with a person who is not attractive to them, like it is a must or the relationship is bad.



No you don't, Looks don't don't keep a relationship strong. What you have in common and how the person is in general is what matters and holds a relationship. If you was to go for all these hawt girls then find out she was a total spaz later, You would not stay with her. Unless you like getting treated like dirt just to have a girl that is hawt and feel good about yourself for it.

I have wanted to be with girls who people say are not all that attractive. But her looks is not what made me fall in love with them. it was their personality and the many things we had in common. The fact that there is lots of people like me who could care less about how attractive one is is the reason looks don't mean anything. Looks only matter to people that just want too much and have some wierd pride in them. How a person is holds the love between man and woman. Not looks.

What do you tell a woman when they want to feel 'pretty' When they want to know what you like about them? You can say anything emotionally or verbally about their personality, saying how they are so smart, and they are always there for you, or things of that sort. But deep down, that doesn't make them feel sexy or attractive, in the end it only shows that they would be a good friend.

But you both are not there to be friends, but to be lovers and in a relationship.

I'm not saying you have to say "yeah babe you have an amazing body" or "your stomach is so flat" or "your skin is so smooth" Because those things don't always apply. But you're GOING to have something you like about them! I mean, people have different views of attraction. I for one like chubby girls, i think it's more natural and i'd rather not like skinny, so seeing a girl who has a bit of chub whether in her stomach, or her legs, something that they might be otherwise self concious about, i enjoy, and they'll be more willing to show it off, it makes them sexy, and feel better about being with me. Whether it's something that the world as a whole likes however is not a factor.

Pacmansays isn't saying that the girl has the be smoking hot to the work, but he IS saying that the person has to have somethnig you personally find attractive.

 

[Dark.Pch]

You still have to understand that when I refer to attractiveness I do not refer to looks specifically: being physically attracted to someone does not mean that the person is good looking or you think they are but being attracted to someone means wanting to kiss, be close to, be intimite with and be physical with the person.

Physical attraction can be as much as due to personality as it is to looks. There are probably multiple reasons why you find someone attractive and looks aren't necessarily one factor of it. Take for example Chris Evans marrying Billie Piper (if you're not British search them up on google): her being extremely beautiful and him very ugly but they had a physical attraction to each other and both have said that their personalities are a part of it.

A relationship will fail if you realise you are only attracted by one aspect of them: just looks suggests that it is lust, just personality means that a physical relationship can never be had and just money or power will only last as long as the two factors last.

Below are Billie Piper and Chris Evans

Chris Evans

Billie Piper

What do you tell a woman when they want to feel 'pretty' When they want to know what you like about them? You can say anything emotionally or verbally about their personality, saying how they are so smart, and they are always there for you, or things of that sort. But deep down, that doesn't make them feel sexy or attractive, in the end it only shows that they would be a good friend.

But you both are not there to be friends, but to be lovers and in a relationship.

I'm not saying you have to say "yeah babe you have an amazing body" or "your stomach is so flat" or "your skin is so smooth" Because those things don't always apply. But you're GOING to have something you like about them! I mean, people have different views of attraction. I for one like chubby girls, i think it's more natural and i'd rather not like skinny, so seeing a girl who has a bit of chub whether in her stomach, or her legs, something that they might be otherwise self concious about, i enjoy, and they'll be more willing to show it off, it makes them sexy, and feel better about being with me. Whether it's something that the world as a whole likes however is not a factor.

Pacmansays isn't saying that the girl has the be smoking hot to the work, but he IS saying that the person has to have somethnig you personally find attractive.

The whole topic of this was looks. If they matter. And when it comes to being attractive, the first thing people would think about is how the person looks, and that matters most to people than anything else. Being attractive to people is not only looks. There is more to it than that. But for most people, it is usually about looks. And if you don't got them, they won't bother with you, even if you have the personality that are looking for.

And as I said before, there are people who won't brush someone off over looks. Thus states that looks don't really matter. What the person is about is what matters and comes first than anything else.

 

[Crimson King]

I believe the adage referred to when looking for a spouse, looks do not matter, and that is somewhat true. The rationale behind it is if you are marrying someone, and it's for the rest of your lives, you will both age together, and your looks will become worse. So, if you are marrying a girl or a guy just because they are attractive, that'll be pointless in the long run, so you need to have something more.

Now, we live in a time where divorce rates are really high, so there is always the idea of not even marrying and just having fun, so you'd need a spouse that is attractive both physically and emotionally.

 

[pacmansays]

The whole topic of this was looks. If they matter. And when it comes to being attractive, the first thing people would think about is how the person looks, and that matters most to people than anything else. Being attractive to people is not only looks. There is more to it than that. But for most people, it is usually about looks. And if you don't got them, they won't bother with you, even if you have the personality that are looking for.

And as I said before, there are people who won't brush someone off over looks. Thus states that looks don't really matter. What the person is about is what matters and comes first than anything else.

See how do you know the first thing people go for is looks, you're assuming you know how everyone else chooses a partner. And if they do first base it on looks, could you blame them? They're generally the first thing you're going to see and will probably form the initial impression. But like I said, people move past the looks and might date someone who they don't even think looks good: my friend did that and he's still 'happy' (she bickers all the time with him so i don't know why he is) with her because he gave her a shot beyond her looks.

 

[Purple]

I believe the adage referred to when looking for a spouse, looks do not matter, and that is somewhat true. .

Usually we go by looks first, and depending on how conversations and different events come into place. shows will the relations get to the point of "love".

When you feel like you have feelings about someone, as a male i think of how they smile, how they looked at me, things of that sort, those are physical qualities.

Granted i might think of a few things that she said that were cute or interesting, but it would be mostly physical qualities. Eventually the looks would've taken their course and there will be more needed in the long run, that is true i will give you that. no one stays "beautiful" or "attractive" physically for long. However the initial relationship is started through attraction.

 

[Shadow13]

Looks do matter for many people, even for marriage.
When people go on a date, they usually go with people that they think look attractive. After dating for a while, other things about them like intellect, intelligence, personality, ect, start to be known about each other.
Those are the kinds of things that long term relationships last with. With that in mind, think of who you would ask out on a date. They probably look good, whether you know about their personality already or not.

 

[Wizzerd]

But do having bigger muscles and larger hips/breasts really have an impact on how reliable a partner will be? These instincts are from the caveman era, when men with larger muscles could bring home more meat and women with larger hips/breasts could create and nourish more babies. In this day and age, anybody can go to the grocery store no matter how big their muscles are and anybody can bear and raise children with scientific processes and baby formula. We still have the preconceptions that a partner with bigger muscles or hips or breasts or what-have-you is better, however, even though they don't mean anything anymore.

 

[Chaco]

But do having bigger muscles and larger hips/breasts really have an impact on how reliable a partner will be? These instincts are from the caveman era, when men with larger muscles could bring home more meat and women with larger hips/breasts could create and nourish more babies. In this day and age, anybody can go to the grocery store no matter how big their muscles are and anybody can bear and raise children with scientific processes and baby formula. We still have the preconceptions that a partner with bigger muscles or hips or breasts or what-have-you is better, however, even though they don't mean anything anymore.

Woah. I completely, utterly disagree with this. Having muscle means nothing anymore as far as a provider? Well, you're thinking only of nourishment. When you should also think outside of that into protection. Women are complex creatures. When they want someone to protect them, who do you think they are going to go to? Not the guy who can't handle himself.

And then there's this...

In this day and age, anybody can go to the grocery store no matter how big their muscles are and anybody can bear and raise children with scientific processes and baby formula.

This is just laughable. You really think it's that easy. You need a wake up call on life.

 

[Riddle]

Of course physical attraction matters, when you try to find a partner. Just like the will to live, or jerking your hand back from being burned, it is an instinct. When a man or woman looks for a partner, there are several things s/he takes in to consideration however. Physical attraction is not enough to sustain a relationship, but personality similarities aren't either. To build a good, healthy relationship you need a mix of all of these aspects. A good partner will be both Physically and emotionally attractive to you.

 

[Purple]

Of course physical attraction matters, when you try to find a partner. Just like the will to live, or jerking your hand back from being burned, it is an instinct. When a man or woman looks for a partner, there are several things s/he takes in to consideration however. Physical attraction is not enough to sustain a relationship, but personality similarities aren't either. To build a good, healthy relationship you need a mix of all of these aspects. A good partner will be both Physically and emotionally attractive to you.

well from first intentions you would look at physical attraction, everything has to be banging hot persay, but you have to be attracted to make the first move, and then you would look at emotional attraction.

 

[pacmansays]

Why is everyone assuming physical attraction is based solely on physical attributes....of course looks will matter when you're picking up someone at a club or bar but what about friends who become attracted to each other?

Physical attraction for me is not solely based on looks and generally emotional content causes more physical attraction for me than looks.

Also, its been found that most people date those considered of a similar attractiveness to themselves.

 

[Shadow13]

Why is everyone assuming physical attraction is based solely on physical attributes....of course looks will matter when you're picking up someone at a club or bar but what about friends who become attracted to each other?

Physical attraction for me is not solely based on looks and generally emotional content causes more physical attraction for me than looks.

Also, its been found that most people date those considered of a similar attractiveness to themselves.

I am not saying it is solely physical attributes, but they do play a big part.
Friends can become attracted to each other, but have you ever been attracted to somebody who you think is very ugly?
Not trying to sound rude, but most people, even in friend relationships won't be attracted much to somebody if they are very ugly or have a bad personality.
As for the final part, you didn't state that they thought that the other person was very attractive, but if they look OK to you and you like their personality then what would you feel is bad about you dating them? People can be attracted to people who aren't considered very hot.

 

[pacmansays]

I am not saying it is solely physical attributes, but they do play a big part.
Friends can become attracted to each other, but have you ever been attracted to somebody who you think is very ugly?
Not trying to sound rude, but most people, even in friend relationships won't be attracted much to somebody if they are very ugly or have a bad personality.
As for the final part, you didn't state that they thought that the other person was very attractive, but if they look OK to you and you like their personality then what would you feel is bad about you dating them? People can be attracted to people who aren't considered very hot.

Here's the thing though, if someone has got a great personality or something then to me they become physically attractive and they look amazing to me. I've fancied and dated people some might say aren't pretty or anything but they seemed it to me.

 

[Riddle]

The thing is, not only are good-looking people thought of as attractive, but also more honest, hardworking, sincere, amusing, etc. (This is proven by scientific studies) This gives more attractive people a much greater chance to even be able to start a relationship, and if this relationship doesn't work out then they have their pick of men/women. Average-looking or ugly people have to rely on just their personality, which won't attract people as well. They have to be in close contact with someone (work, school) to start a relationship most of the time. (source)