Mikau et al
Smash Journeyman
Okay, so I've decided to post this here, as it really can't fit anywhere else.
*SPOILERS*
Okay, so here’s my official Kirby conspiracy theory. I don’t believe that Sakurai is a malicious imp trying to screw with people’s lives, but I really do think that Brawl is mostly about the Kirby series. So I guess this is more of a Kirby Fascism theory. Note that although Mother/Earthbound series also got more representation than it deserved in terms of bosses, music, characters, etc., it is far less prevalent than Kirby.
The most obvious is the series representation. Kirby, with three characters in the starting roster, gains both MK and D3, while in the final roster Mario loses the Doc, Zelda gets a Young Link makeover, Pokemon loses M2 (okay, at least they replace him, unlike Mario), and Metroid still doesn’t have Ridley. I appreciate that Kirby deserved a second rep in Melee and most likely three in Brawl, but this just isn’t fair representation when so many other series were slighted.
The next reason is SSE, supposedly the biggest and most awesome addition to the SSB franchise. Look at all of the stuff brought in for series outside of characters. Mario series has Bowser’s clown car and Petey Piranha (lame). Legend of Zelda has a sword (uber lame). Starfox has some ships. Pokemon gets Rayquaza (and no M2). Metroid gets Ridley (should have been playable). Kirby gets a warp star, but that’s not all. It also gets MK’s ship, which serves as a major goal/battle zone and the primary mode of transportation to confront the antagonists’ “super-ship” thing. Kirby is also the one who destroys the super-ship thing with the Dragoon star, which also happens to be the most powerful item in the game (since when was Kirby racing relevant to the Kirby series? Mario Kart and Diddy Kong Racing are considered cop-out spin-offs of the Mario and DK series). At the very end of SSE at the turning point of the plot where all of the characters are turned into trophies and all hope seems lost, what is it that saves them? Oh, D3’s stupid little medallions (how should that make sense? And forgive me for not having played Kirby very much, but are those even canon to the Kirby games?). And, of course, through a not-so-clever plot twist, Kirby happens to be one of the three (out of thirty or so characters) that is “surprisingly” revived. In conclusion, SSE is all about Kirby.
I’ve already noted that the most powerful and individualized item in the game is from an obscure Kirby game, but even Brawl’s music betrays Sakurai’s favoritism (albeit, very discreetly). Cut content hidden in the game disc has revealed that all of the characters were intended to have their own victory theme (and it actually looks like there might have been close to fifty characters, if you look at the number, just fyi). Unfortunately, these were all cut, save for one: MK. Bowser’s was cool from what we heard, I think I remember hearing other char's, but no. Only frickin’ Metaknight gets his own victory theme.
So, ignore it all you want, but that won’t change the undeniable fact that Sakurai made Brawl exceedingly biased toward the Kirby series.
For the flamers: I don't hate Kirby. I like it very much. There just should have been either less of it in Brawl, or more of everything else.
*SPOILERS*
Okay, so here’s my official Kirby conspiracy theory. I don’t believe that Sakurai is a malicious imp trying to screw with people’s lives, but I really do think that Brawl is mostly about the Kirby series. So I guess this is more of a Kirby Fascism theory. Note that although Mother/Earthbound series also got more representation than it deserved in terms of bosses, music, characters, etc., it is far less prevalent than Kirby.
The most obvious is the series representation. Kirby, with three characters in the starting roster, gains both MK and D3, while in the final roster Mario loses the Doc, Zelda gets a Young Link makeover, Pokemon loses M2 (okay, at least they replace him, unlike Mario), and Metroid still doesn’t have Ridley. I appreciate that Kirby deserved a second rep in Melee and most likely three in Brawl, but this just isn’t fair representation when so many other series were slighted.
The next reason is SSE, supposedly the biggest and most awesome addition to the SSB franchise. Look at all of the stuff brought in for series outside of characters. Mario series has Bowser’s clown car and Petey Piranha (lame). Legend of Zelda has a sword (uber lame). Starfox has some ships. Pokemon gets Rayquaza (and no M2). Metroid gets Ridley (should have been playable). Kirby gets a warp star, but that’s not all. It also gets MK’s ship, which serves as a major goal/battle zone and the primary mode of transportation to confront the antagonists’ “super-ship” thing. Kirby is also the one who destroys the super-ship thing with the Dragoon star, which also happens to be the most powerful item in the game (since when was Kirby racing relevant to the Kirby series? Mario Kart and Diddy Kong Racing are considered cop-out spin-offs of the Mario and DK series). At the very end of SSE at the turning point of the plot where all of the characters are turned into trophies and all hope seems lost, what is it that saves them? Oh, D3’s stupid little medallions (how should that make sense? And forgive me for not having played Kirby very much, but are those even canon to the Kirby games?). And, of course, through a not-so-clever plot twist, Kirby happens to be one of the three (out of thirty or so characters) that is “surprisingly” revived. In conclusion, SSE is all about Kirby.
I’ve already noted that the most powerful and individualized item in the game is from an obscure Kirby game, but even Brawl’s music betrays Sakurai’s favoritism (albeit, very discreetly). Cut content hidden in the game disc has revealed that all of the characters were intended to have their own victory theme (and it actually looks like there might have been close to fifty characters, if you look at the number, just fyi). Unfortunately, these were all cut, save for one: MK. Bowser’s was cool from what we heard, I think I remember hearing other char's, but no. Only frickin’ Metaknight gets his own victory theme.
So, ignore it all you want, but that won’t change the undeniable fact that Sakurai made Brawl exceedingly biased toward the Kirby series.
For the flamers: I don't hate Kirby. I like it very much. There just should have been either less of it in Brawl, or more of everything else.
