Pit - Okay, WOW. Where do I start? Just like the Ice Climbers, he is some retro character from a ****ty one-shot game that nobody cared about brought back from the abyss to fight with all-stars such as Mario and Link. Pit's specials is like the holy grail for newbies. You don't have to be remotely good to use arrows, or spam his two (not one, but two!) reflectors. And his voice literally makes me want to smash my controller in two and go strangle some babies. I ****ing hate his taunts/win poses because they tried to make him sound all cool and cocky.....too bad his mouth doesn't even match up with his words. I hate Pit so much that I can't even stand looking at his icon at the bottom of the screen during a match because he looks like a *** with the queer look on his face. That and those fruity sandals he wears. Looks like his feet are swolen or something. **** Pit...
Meta-*** - The ultimate n00b attracter. I hate how they tried to make him look all overly cool with all the dissapearing, quick sword slashes, deep voice, and his own intro music (Why?). It's fun to smash the **** out of him.
Wario - What happened to all the Wario haters? I always thought Wario deserved a spot in the game, but it's nearly impossible not to hate this clown. His moveset is repulsive and lacks any kind of finesse or style. It's like he's not evil enough to be a villian and he's not humorous enough to be a good comic relief. Just some obese garlic-eating moron who uses biting and farying attakcs, and the latter is only funny to people under the age of eight. The fact he is the only guy to get 12 ****ing costume options bothers me too since he is not a popular character. Mario is a much more interesting character has had
several occupations, yet he can't get a Doc costume? Lose.
Olimar - Who invited this guy? Nintendo loves to overpower characters that are least deserving, and Olimar was at the top of the list. He comes from some third-rate Gamecube game that nobody cares about. Plus I hate his fighting style: Some no-name *** who is the size of an iPod hides behind little flower creatues and uses them as projectiles to fight. The Pikmin stage doesn't even have any good music which is another strike.
Diddy Kong - Ya know, at first I was glad he made it in since the DK franchise deserved another member besides the big ape himself, but when I actually fought against him, I want to squash his brain. He's a stereotypical chimp who can exploit Brawl's dumbest gameplay feature (tripping) using banana peels. I get it. He's a monkey. But that slipping on banana peels gag hasn't been funny since Looney Tunes abused it about 45 ****ing years ago. He has
the lamest projectile weapon in the history of fightng games and those obnoxious monkey noises he makes really piss me off.
Lucas - As if I didn't hate Ness enough already, they bring
this kid in. Lucas has such a crap design. He has a dumb look on his face, an oversized head, and generic clothes like Ness but he's a total *****. He's like Luigi minus the comic relief. So, being the stupid decision makers Nintendo can be, they had to make him overpowered. I hate how all of his smashes kill you at 80%. Especially his f-smash
which is a mother****ing stick he pulled out of the ****ing ground. That winpose where it looks like he's poking at the dirt and looks at the camera with a "huh?" expression on his face is also very lame.
Ike - Okay, WTF? Is Ike even as strong in his FE games as he is in Smash Bros.? It's like Ike wasn't happy with his medium speed and medium power, so he used some magic to steal some of Ganon's strength while Ganon was taking a snooze (Come to think of it, Ike is what Ganon should have been...). Newbies seem to love Ike as much as they love Meta-***. It's fun to own Ike in 1vs1, though.
Toon Link - WE DON'T NEED MORE THAN ONE LINK. There is reason Doc and Pichu aren't in Brawl, and that's because they were altered versions of the same character (Mario as a doctor, and Pika as a baby). Toon Link is another version of the Link we already had, just with a dumbed down appearance (HE'S NOT EVEN CEL-SHADED!). The Zelda franchise has more potential fighters than having another guy in a green tunic as the fourth rep. Link is finally starting to look like a good character, and it's a **** shame he is getting overshadowed by some punk who shares the same name.
Jigglypuff - It's moves annoy me greatly as well as it's subpar final smash and it's stupid voice but more importantly...why is it still here? It's a generic poke'mon in the games and the only reason it became a playable character was because of the ******* anime. People who stopped playing Poke'mon still know who Pikachu is, but Jigglypuff is on the forgotten list. The fact Mewtwo was cut and Jiggs is still here is baffling.
Falco - Reflector and lasers are pretty gay, and I've been killed by Landmaster too many times. Plus he comes off as a bit of an *** and twirls like a ballerina. And what the **** is up with up with his fingers?
R.O.B. I don't actually hate him at all, but he is the perfect example of a wasted character spot.
That said, I like ROB. He's not deserving to be in, but he has more personality than some other established characters.
...
What kind of personality can a SNES accessory have?
IECE OF **** SPAMMING ANGEL! IT HAS THE STUPIDEST TAUNTS EVER AND ITS VOICE SOUNDS LIKE A 5 YEAR OLD! HIYAAAAYAAAAA,HIYAAAAAA!!!! HEY GUYS YOUR NOT READY YE-*rips of wings and feeds to stray dog*.
Now that that is out of the way, my most loathed character in brawl (it was hard to decide) is Lucario.
