KneeOfJustice99

IT'S FLAT ERIC FRIDAY Y'ALL



PHONE UR FRIENDS N SHOW THEM SOME EPIC MUSIC (AND ALSO EAT A SAUSAGE OR NINE)

I was headed to my bus stop this morning when I came across 26 copies of Fantastic Four: Rise of the Silver Surfer on DVD strewn across the road. For context, the road in front of my house is like, quite a major one. I have no idea who left them there but I can only gather, given the film, that it was very much intentional.

hi back from a brief hiatus (been working on some projects n stuff lol) sorry ive been gone for a couple days

today's funny uhhhhh here you go

Are you actually a girl?

imagine if we had four arms and it was just normal. like, usually four arms are used in fiction to indicate greater dexterity (like being able to clap with two and posing with the other two) but like, would our world just be designed around four arms instead of two? imagine how like a video game controller would look. i mean would you have dominance in your left/right arms or upper/lower arms? or would you have a singular dominant hand? would schools go ape**** at you for writing with your lower arms?

worldbuilding is weird y'all

shreds a sick guitar solo

i'm here to kick gum and chew ass. and i'm all out of gum.

might be somewhat inactive for a few days, going on a holiday

wait i need to post a profile post funny uhhhh i stood on a lego today and the resulting nuclear explosion rendered ferrets extinct

I think a really fun speedrun category to see in Minecraft would be what I've christened "Jukebox%." Essentially, the speedrun goes like this:

The "final goal" is to craft a jukebox, acquire a music disc of any form, and then play the music disc (with the run ending the moment that the disc is put inside the jukebox.) You're allowed to do essentially anything you want in the process of doing so, but that's what you need to do.

This would bring up quite a few interesting points that you usually don't see in a traditional Minecraft speedrun, mostly because of a few unique factors at play, including:

• The unique nature of the Jukebox as a "final point" may completely negate any need to reach the Nether or the End, meaning that the RNG of trading with Piglins often used to rapidly acquire Ender Pearls would be essentially unnecessary. Due to only needing one diamond and 8 planks, it'd be arguably one of the easier parts of the run.
• With more recent updates, the acquisition of Music Discs is now in itself an open book for possibility. As well as the potential for mob engineering with the traditional method of having a Skeleton shoot a Creeper (which would reward a unique area of expertise and may actually be faster than other methods, provided you can defend yourself effectively,) it's now also possible to come across Discs in several naturally generating structures such as the Stronghold, Dungeons, Bastion Remnants, Buried Treasure, Woodland Mansions, and the new Ancient City. This would have the potential of allowing an alternative method of acquiring a Disc - but in itself creates two very unique, diverging paths with their own strengths and weaknesses.
• In itself, the nature of the speedrun is slightly absurd but not enough to be ridiculous. Unlike speedruns that would want to acquire a tool like a Netherite Hoe, the acquisition of both a Jukebox and a Music Disc would reward unique skills as well as being a part of Minecraft usually missed in speedruns, without feeling too contrived like a "redstone flying machine%" might (for example.)

This probably already exists though lmao

So, I recently played through Deltarune Chapters 1 & 2 and something stuck out to me. Something huge.

The menu screen has a really weird and like almost spacey feel to it (I think it's called ANOTHER HIM or something) and I'm listening to it and then it hits me. It hits me like a semi-truck in the first episode of an isekai.

The little melody that repeats throughout the track is the exact same melody as the saxophone in Who Can it Be Now? by Men at Work. And I was, and still am, shooketh.

Tl;dr, this means that Neil Cicierega is actually going to be a secret boss character in the game

i feel the walls shake and hear the windows rattle. a being of great power is passing my home at high speed. i have seen these beings consume individuals whom walk into them willingly. the nature of this mysterious ritual is unknown to me. i do not understand why people would wait for half an hour under shelters and beside poles of steel, only to be consumed and whisked away by this strange beast. it appears not to move on legs, but upon wheels, though the sounds of loud humming and the occasional sharp breath indicate that it is indeed organic, despite what its appearance suggests.

i know not what to make of these observations but to fear those great beings of steel and glass that wander this world.

soulja boy tell em yea i got a new dance for yall called the soulja boy

idea i just had: imagine if they like remade smash and removed all non-villain characters, but as a response added tons more villains to the roster given it's just them now

like the idea of playable kraid or kamek would be amazing but what if we took it to the logical extreme and added like zoda from startropics or the eggplant wizard from the original kid icarus, the most powerful enemy known to man

you know on that it'd be really cool to just see random mooks and enemies in a fighting game like this. imagining something like a roster where the main character is like lakitu and amongst others there's picks like the classic zora and the like would be pretty fun too

You know what? **** it. I think it'd be hilarious if Smash took some inspiration from LAWL concepts. Here's one that springs to mind for me:

Why would you include Funky Kong as an echo for Donkey Kong when you could build a moveset entirely around him on the Flame Runner. Yes, the Mario Kart Wii rep. His entire moveset is based around Mario Kart with a focus on Wii, as well as speedrunning tips and tricks and the fan community as a whole. His up-air summons the logo of Dolphin Emulator for example. Maybe his Down B is him clipping through the stage as a counter. Oh, and he's consistently rewarded for doing everything as fast as possible.

I feel like bull**** characters like this would make Smash so interesting to see (even if I don't think Smash should just become a ****post.) Like, ridiculous concepts like this that would never have been considered otherwise and it's like "**** it. why not."

I'm in this weird situation where I agree it would be cool to see Black Mage in Smash but like I personally think that, purely in terms of gameplay, the Red Mage would probably be the best objective choice and a "FF1 Party" would be really fun too. Even if it were just a team of like Black Mage and White Mage (who would appear like Ice Climbers but function as individuals) with Black Mage using more of the offensive magical attacks and White Mage using more of the utility magical attacks, that'd still be really cool to see.

But I guess we have Hero now and Hero kind of represents the three tiers of magical attacks (with a fire, ice, and thunder type attack) as well as basically all RPG magic now so it's like, how do I justify Black Mage being in Smash now given that Hero does so much of that? But then Hero isn't even particularly notable for "being a sorcerer" compared to Black Mage so it's this weird sort of inbetween where it's like, it makes so much sense to include Hero because Dragon Quest is cool and has potential but then Hero doesn't really represent Dragon Quest and kind of just is the "Magical Fantasy-themed RPG Character" - this is actually one of the reasons I preferred the idea of Slime getting in because Slime would more specifically be a Dragon Quest character? I mean I haven't even played a Dragon Quest game but I feel like Hero's in this weird situation where I could theoretically mod in like, nearly any magically-themed RPG protagonist and it'd probably fit, but then that's kind of fitting because Hero is just that, a nameless protagonist, and that's what he's supposed to represent, and yet with us having so many RPG characters it's so weird that we barely get to see various RPG archetypes aside from "the hero with the magical sword or some crap" and all of the archetypes are represented by "the hero with the magical sword or some crap"

this feels really weird to me and this is completely following my own train of thought without editing so if it doesn't make sense, that's why

I think Lakitu would be a very funny inclusion into the next Smash. There's so many more obvious Mario picks out there, like Toad, Waluigi, Paper Mario, Kamek, Goomba, Professor E. Gadd, 8-Bit Mario, Birdo, decloned Daisy, and tons more. And it's like "**** you you get Lakitu". Hey, at least it's not the cow from Moo Moo Meadows, right?

Jokes aside, the idea of Lakitu being an aerial-focused fighter who excels at pressuring directly below him would be really fun to me. I guess it'd be like an even more laser-focused Ivysaur, though with a lot more aerial options. He'd be pretty cool if he got in, even if there's so many better picks out there.

Like, I'm in this situation where I do understand the idea of "Smash is a celebration of gaming history", but at the same time, I want future games to be able to add just outright weird picks and letting them experiment with it. Like, yeah, there are some characters that would be obvious for future titles (characters like Bandana Waddle Dee spring to mind, but also slightly more obscure picks like Vaati) but then it's like, why limit yourselves? Why not add like, Beedle or Dr. Goomba Tower or the entire Federation Force or Mighty Gazelle or something? If they'd have fun and unique movesets, I think that justifies them to a certain extent.

Just a thought that occurred to me.

If Paper Mario got into Smash and sort of opened the door for alternate versions of characters with unique gameplay (unlike, say, Young/Toon Link), I think the next best character to see would absolutely be Yarn Kirby. Yes, we have a Yarn Yoshi alt in Ultimate but the incredibly unique appearance and abilities of Yarn Kirby would be so fun to see implemented into Smash, even if it feels really unlikely that they'd ever consider him. I mean, Prince Fluff could work as a replacement I suppose? I personally think he'd be a better alternate costume model-swap.

Also, Peppa Pig and Baby Shark are woefully low on people's radar for NASB DLC. Sounds ridiculous but I wouldn't be surprised if Viacom wanted to open the door to like NickJR despite it not being the target audience at all and to be honest I would be pretty interested to see how Ludosity would handle a fighting game moveset for Pippa Peg

A thought that occurred to me as I was lying in my bed this morning staring at my ceiling was how funny the potential reveal of PSASBRII could actually be. Like, imagine you wake up one day and you see an article on SmashBoards which is like "CRASH, SPYRO, LARA CROFT AND CLOUD WERE CONFIRMED" and just in the corner of the attached image you see like Bubsy and Arden Lyn from Masters of Teräs Käsi and the article's going ape**** about Crash and then mentions for like one line "Oh yeah I guess Arden's inclusion opens the door to all licensed games so we could probably see Spider-Man I guess"

Please, a moment to appreciate some abstract art. I think the pairing of the black and the white, plus the rigid scheming of the utilisation of solid blocks of colour, represents conformity and the nature of society and our roles within it. However, a privileged few see otherwise, recognising not a conformist blanket, but a grin of mischevious determination.

Yoooo if they ever make a Newgrounds Rumble uh 2 or something they should totally add ENA.

Like, I know that the vibes of her world and the nature of it all would be amazing on it's own. Don't get me wrong. But I'm fascinated to see how ENA would actually work in a fighting game, because like, she has a ton of potential for weird and wonderful movesets and mechanics and I want to see them all goddammit

Still think that 8-Bit Mario would be a very good inclusion into Smash Bros. That video that was making the rounds was amazing and I'd absolutely adore seeing a weird inclusion like that.

"It's morbin' time!" is well and truly the quote ever.
- Time Magazine.

Cool Game Idea:

Wii Tanks, but it's a dungeon-crawler/MetroidVania styled game which is completely on the sort of level of the top-down perspective. You can get upgrades and special abilities by finding them across the map or defeating bosses, but it'd be a little absurd - a little like Metal Slug or something of the like. Comes with a multiplayer too, of course.

I mean, imagine the potential for builds: a flamethrower tank might seem cool to some but I can picture myself combining bouncing bullets and a shotgun-style spread shot for maximum carnage.

Not sure what the story would be in a game like this but it just feels like something that would be really fun somehow

Okay, random thought I just had. Would a Netflix fighting game be, like, actually... really cool? Consider for a moment the potential:

Netflix could envelop so many genres here. Like, sure there's some characters that might not be a good pick (Joe Exotic springs to mind, as much as he would be amazingly fun as a summoner-puppet character who fights with tigers) but when you consider the potential with a variety of characters from Eleven, to Peewee Herman, to Bojack Horseman, to She-Ra, to a team-up of Klaus and Ben Hargreeves, to Jolyne Kujo. And so many more. Imagine Geralt fighting He-Man, or Piper Chapman with a prison-brawler style moveset fighting someone like Captain Barnacles from Octonauts.

It feels like one of the most stupid concepts ever but I can't help but love it as an idea.

I'm very annoyed, because for like the last 3 days, Firefox has been slowing my laptop to a crawl nearly all of the time. I've tried erasing the history, all of the cookies, hell I'm running on two tabs right now when I used to use around one hundred at a time believe me I'm very disorganised and yet it's still nightmarishly difficult to even load SmashBoards. I don't even know why either. Like, I'm checking it in Task Manager and it's using around 2,000 MB of memory but like. HOW? This sounds like a very awkward thing to complain about but browsers as a whole just seem so god damn slow nowadays. Edge uses more CPU than the average crypto farm and Chrome seems more effective at turning your laptop into a high-octane shrapnel bomb than actually googling Cash Banooca 26: The Cancelling of Aku-Aku

I want to make some sort of extremely volatile statement about this, but I know I'll probably get banned from the site for it, so I'll leave it at this:

The DS having both Mario Kart DS and Sonic and SEGA All-Stars Racing makes it arguably one of the best consoles out there for kart racers even if most of this is due to my own nostalgia

No DLC, no micropurchases. All of the content is unlockable in game, both games are stuffed with content including not only unique tracks and racers, but lots of side/single-player content like missions - both having unique and interesting missions of their own, be it the experimental mission types in SASASR or the bosses in MKDS - and all of them having plenty of replayability, tight and responsive controls, and genuinely not terrible visuals considering the limitations of the hardware.

Not to sound too nostalgic but I kind of miss when games were like that y'know? You just... buy the game and it's packed with content. You'd never see something random like R.O.B. being a hidden character in Mario Kart now, it'd be publicised and everything. Perhaps I merely wish for a simpler time...

Also I think an Indie Kart would be a fun game to see this is like a completely unrelated musing okay bye

Random thought, but you know how there was this sort of running joke that Pac-Man in first-person is a horror title? I just thought something - I think Bomberman would work really well in that sort of style. Imagine, your only method of self-defence is to place bombs as you're in this huge maze, being chased down...

Apparently there was actually a game like this released on PC systems in the mid-80s, but as you can imagine, it was limited by the time... picture this in like, VR. Seems to me like it'd be a creepy experience!

Random question here: am I the only one out there who always has SmashBoards zoomed out to 80% instead of 100%? It just seems to be the right size to me and that way you can also see all of the faces of the characters on either side and it just feels right somehow.

or is it just autism brain i don't even know lolololololol

Properly delving into LSD: Dream Emulator in the real world and it's actually very fascinating to observe. Whole albums were released for it, and the journal it's based on is incredibly interesting. Sato himself is a bizarre and unusual character... overall, I actually think this is just incredibly fun to delve into. It feels like a rabbit hole in a really fun way.

I think an underrated pick for a potential PlayStation All Stars II, if it were to be released but under similar 3rd-party restrictions to the original, would be Vibri from Vib-Ribbon. Despite being relatively obscure compared to other PS1 picks, I think the really unique world of Vib-Ribbon - as well as a surprising amount of potential considering the source material - would make them a very cute but also fun inclusion in a game like that!

However, if a couple of third-party picks were to be allowed in (similar to Dante or Raiden), I'd totally say that Klonoa would be a fun pick to see. Namco had a pretty big presence on the PS1 (especially with things like Namco Museum) and Klonoa did get its start on the console! It may seem a little odd, but Klonoa does have very vocal fans and admittedly I think he'd be very fun to see.

Genuinely, PSASBR2 would be amazingly fun to see, it's just a bit of a shame they'd probably not consider it after the relative failure of the first. Then again... with the recent uptake in NASB and MultiVersus, maybe they'd consider giving it a second look?

Okay, so MultiVersus is ramping up over time and it's on the tip of everyone's tongues. With the recent addition of Taz and the Iron Giant, and more leaks than the average church roof, I think there's a few series that people don't talk about enough. Thing is, WB is big. Like, real big. People have, admittedly, already given their two cents on what IPs they want to see included in the game, some better than others. However, I think this is a bit unprecedented but I feel it's a fun, and very cool, thing to consider - even if unlikely.

Allow me to introduce you all to Warner Music Label, perhaps the most underrated "rep" in the whole of MultiVersus discussion. Consider, for a moment, some of the additions we could potentially see whilst considering this:

• A stage based on Take on Me by A-ha, specifically with the pencil-sketch design to it.
• A stage based on the music video to Uptown Funk, perhaps even with Bruno and his hypesquad present.
• The world of Crazy Frog, given that Crazy Frog is apparently WMG too??
• A stage based on the overall vibe of Gorillaz, perhaps taking inspiration from the tower in the video for Feel Good Inc.?
• Actually just a playable stage of the Blue Album by Weezer with alts based on the Green Album and Red Album.

And this isn't even getting into a myriad of other artists, such as (but not limited to) Fleetwood Mac, ABBA, Green Day, Jimi Hendrix, Kraftwerk, Huey Lewis and the News, Queen, Frank Sinatra, Tears for Fears, and so many more.

Okay, so WB isn't exactly known for it's music and this opens up a whole new can of worms with licensing the likenesses of the artists and the like. But let me be honest for a moment. I wouldn't be opposed to beating Superman and the Iron Giant to an utter pulp with a tag-team of Freddie Mercury and Crazy Frog. And as ridiculous as this might sound, some musical reps (like 2D, for instance) actually feel like pretty natural inclusions.

I cannot believe it took me so long to come to this conclusion even if it's most likely never gonna happen due to the focus on IP. This just seems like a weirdly clever, but at the same time obvious, way to take the game in the future. Musical reps just seem like such a fun concept to delve into, right?

I'm so confused at the situation with the new Rescue Rangers. Like, I knew the last one existed and had a rough idea what it was and my first exposure to it is stuff like Disney chimeras, fashion model Dobby, and Paw Patrol mauling people and I have no idea what to make of it. I'm a bit afraid.

Okay, this might sound like an odd point... but hear me out here. I think a good potential way to bring back the Jet Set Radio series that wouldn't break the bank for SEGA or take too much development time, but would be a great way to represent the series as a whole and breathe new life into it, is:

I think that a JSR rhythm game would be a very good idea.

This may sound ridiculous, but like... think about it. Songs from the classic games, as well as newer remixes similarly to how they're handled in the Persona Dancing series (or the intro to Graffiti City from Transformed right here,) and perhaps even a few brand new tracks keeping that style, would work wonders!

Keeping the sort of vibes whilst getting high-quality models of things like characters and locations - whilst not having to handle things like physics engines and the like - could work very well, and after all, a major part of those games is music and dancing as is. Hell, you could even include songs from fan creators like 2Mello and Sashko if we really wanted to push the boat out!

Not only this, but I think something like Jet Set Radio would lend well to cosmetics and the like. Base the game on Jet Set Radio Future, but have costumes from JSR, maybe alternate character skins like NT-3000 and the like? Cool and weird unlockable characters you might not expect, like Captain Hayashi or Gouji Rokkaku himself, would also be very fun to see.

I mean, it would be a big effort... but I mean, imagine the potential. It just seems like a great idea if the series needed a bit of revitalisation but didn't have much to work with due to the relative obscurity of the series in the modern eye.

"I said it before and I'll say it again and again again again"
- Tokyo-To's Funky Uncle, circa 2024

(On another note Bomb Rush Cyberfunk looks very cool and based and I cannot wait)

Something to consider: Why are superheroes from New York City, that have New York accents, so rare? NYC is an incredibly common setting for many superheroes, such as Spider-Man, the Fantastic Four, all of the Watchmen, hell even Captain America and the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles! (Especially odd in that last case, considering the only way they'd have learned to speak is from copying the New York accents of the people above the sewers...)

I feel like this is something you'll never unhear when you realise it.

Really random take here, but one thing I love a lot about modern Doctor Who is that we're beginning to see a lot more of the classic designs of some of the monsters. 60s-era Daleks have appeared a few times, there was the special featuring all of the Cybermen looks (with the Tenth Planet one as a main character which I actually love) and then more recently, the Fourth Doctor-era Sontarans in Flux. I personally love seeing this kind of thing - especially when you consider the nature of Doctor Who as a series about time travel, visiting civilisations and species at different points in time would be quite interesting (and, generally speaking... is kind of a missed opportunity overall.)

It's also why I like it when monsters from the older series, like the Autons or the Zygons, return in a genuinely interesting and well-written way (unlike the treatment of, say, the Weeping Angels.) I think the Autons especially were very well-done back in Rose, really delving into the potential of a situation like that in the modern era - treatment that a lot of other monsters, such as the Wire as seen in The Idiot's Lantern, would be fun to have (I know it's more modern but it's SUCH A COOL CONCEPT.)

For instance, imagine a modern story featuring the Ood but before they were enslaved in the 39th Century, having their connection to the Ood Brain explored and their connection to the Doctor observed (as well as, perhaps, their relation to their cousin species in the Sensorites!) or an ongoing story similar in concept to Flux or Trial of a Time Lord with a main villain in the form of Omega - or even just to see older villains like the Axons, the return of the Wire in a modern context, or, in an ideal world... the Chumblies. (My beloved.)

Random observation on MultiVersus: I really like that they're willing to experiment with weirder mechanics in this one. Things like Arya's ability to replicate the moves of her opponents, or Finn's heavy attacks being more powerful if you use them whilst moving, are just really fun and interesting things to see. (Speaking of Finn, I like that he's even managed to somehow include a shop feature where you can get buffs, that's cool.) There's a lot of moves with unique mechanics and skills and the like that are just really cool to see included.

I feel like Knuckles not being in Sonic CD is a weirdly missed opportunity. The game's main focus is on something Knuckles' gameplay excels at - namely exploration - and it feels a bit weird that they wouldn't take advantage of that.

To be honest, Knuckles' gameplay has so much potential in so many forms. Like, with a few changes, I wouldn't mind a game similar to the treasure-hunting sections from the Adventure series but with modern technology and effective tweaks. I can imagine it actually being really fun - using various different abilities and the like and seeing older Sonic zones interpreted in 3D would be awesome, and HD Pumpkin Hill would be awesome too. I mean, it'll never happen (mostly because of the existence of Chaotix) but it'd still be very, very cool.

What a beautiful place to be, I sure love living in a civilised society where people aren't constantly being brainwashed



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