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The Dating Advice Thread

T

Trick or Treat

Guest
Well, whoever did it (and I think I have an idea...), I thank you! This was unexpected but appreciated! :)

I agree with pretty much everything you said. And I wanted to point out the distinction between casually dating and looking for a serious relationship so that anyone reading these would know we're talking about a clear cut group of people.

The problem for me, is that most people "dating" truly believe they're looking for long term relationships, and realize (when it get less interesting, because if you're with someone for a long time it inevitably will) that they aren't. Even after they realize they don't enjoy their relationship anymore, they don't realize the trend that they go through of losing interest after becoming comfortable with their partner. I'd say this is a psychological phenomenon due to the unconscious mind.

This is where that distinct line becomes blurry, until the person in question becomes aware of their trend and make conscious decisions to either stop it, or accept it until they are in a comfortable relationship one day and realize that they're okay with it this time. I don't think this is a bi-product of "love" either, I think it's a product of maturity. I in turn think that "true love" is a bi-product of two people reaching that point, and being at the right place at the right time (not in a physical sense, but in a mental sense) - OR that "true love" that romances and poetic stories speak of, the ones where the "honeymoon phase" quite literally never goes away and the two people are head over heels for each other forever.
I pretty much agree with most of what you said, here.
To go back to the part about people thinking they're ready to "settle down" per se, but in actuality are not ready - I think that the overwhelming majority of women (and yes, I agree with you; men too) respond to the "dating advice" that main-stream outlets will try and cram down your throat as absolute truth. On the other hand, I believe that with a few tweaks to those "advises" the same information will work the same way for women pursuing men as it will for men pursuing women.
The only thing I disagree with, and this is what I've been trying to say since we started with this, is that I wouldn't call it an "overwhelming" majority. You can definitely say it's a majority, but at least from my experiences so far, it's not really as overwhelming as you seem to think.

In essence, the casual dating game is all about the chase. Eventually the running gets tiresome, and you get to a point where I am. Unfortunately, I'm in my early twenties, and am completely exhausted.
9 times out of 10, yes. I've still found the occasional person who's only looking for casual dating, but are still mostly interested in having common interests with the other person, as opposed to a chase. This isn't very common but I've seen it happen. Kind of like a "friends with benefits" situation with much more emphasis on the "friends" part.

Yeah, I edit a lot of my posts after the fact because I feel like my thoughts have been written before they were fully developed. I appreciate the reassurances from you and Lokii though. <3 I half expected to be told my mindset is uncensored bigotry that's *** backwards. It's nice to have intelligent conversations where the participants don't end up spamming ad hominems because one or more of them are offended.
It's tricky though because the only reason I saw those edits to two of your posts was because I just happened to scroll up. Otherwise I wouldn't have known they existed.
And, I don't really see what's so bad about your mindset. You haven't really said anything, yet, that I'd think negatively of or find offensive!
 

PsychoIncarnate

The Eternal Will of the Swarm
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I'm pranked now, but that's not the same thing
 

Teran

Through Fire, Justice is Served
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I'd probably be a little angry at you.
I like how this is the only thing you give enough of a **** about to come back to Smashbosrds.

All are become Denzel :denzel:
 

#HBC | Acrostic

♖♘♗♔♕♗♘♖
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Hah, figure out "new" SWF, sorta like you figure out your "new" house after someone throws a couple bombs at it. I'll never forgive any of you for the death of Userblogs.
L>Wii codes. Mine is xxxxxxxxxxxxx. Add me. Be my friend. Please.
 

Chronodiver Lokii

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moment of silence for the house of the friendcodes

and the old domain of glorious leader Teran
 
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T

Trick or Treat

Guest
This is is the downside of being new. I feel like I missed a lot of crazy stuff...
 
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#HBC | Acrostic

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This is is the downside of being new. I feel like I missed a lot of crazy stuff...
Teran used to moderate user blogs. It was a daily occurrence that people would use the blogs to try to ask for Wii codes to play with other people, however it wasn't the right place to ask since there was another subsection intended for Wii code sharing. It happened on such a frequent basis that you could argue that it should have just been a place where people could share Wii codes.
 
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T

Trick or Treat

Guest
Teran used to moderate user blogs. It was a daily occurrence that people would use the blogs to try to ask for Wii codes to play with other people, however it wasn't the right place to ask since there was another subsection intended for Wii code sharing. It happened on such a frequent basis that you could argue that it should have just been a place where people could share Wii codes.
Ohhh, so that's not exciting. I never understood why people 'abuse', for lack of a better vocabulary on my part, the blog section. I've seen the same stuff on a Mario Kart forum, among others. Thanks for the info.

So Teran is basically king of the universe then...
 

PsychoIncarnate

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Do you have to give up doing art if you want to meet someone?

That seems to be what people are telling me

Apparently people think it's weird
 

Teran

Through Fire, Justice is Served
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To be fair, there was a time when User Blogs was really awesome, but as with all communities it's made by the people, most of whom left the site or posted in rooms with more lax moderation.

Anyway I'd really like to get involved in something to revamp the whole blog feature with the coming of Smash 4 and all the inevitable new members, but meh we'll have to see about that.
 

Jon Farron

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So I'm interested in a guy, and he's interested in me. We've "dated" practically every night for about a week, but according to him, we're "just friends". This was giving me some seriously mixed signals, and we talked about it. Basically, it seems he's waiting on me to ask him out "officially" but I'm not sure I wanna be the more dominant one in the relationship. I'm also just not sure he's right for me. Granted, dating is all about getting to know each other, I just feel like this won't last long. But then you never know. ._.

It just feels like something's missing.
 
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Sahfarry

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Hopefully related, but I've been having this argument with a few girls at school on whether or not the "friend-zone" actually exists. I say it does, but they say otherwise. What do y'all think?
 

PsychoIncarnate

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Hopefully related, but I've been having this argument with a few girls at school on whether or not the "friend-zone" actually exists. I say it does, but they say otherwise. What do y'all think?
If you are in the friendzone, they weren't attracted to you in the first place
 
T

Trick or Treat

Guest
If I don't see you as anything more than a friend, then I'm 95% of the time going to say "Let's just be friends okay?"

That's what the friendzone is, nothing more, nothing less. A lot of people try to make it out to be this big conspiracy type of thing, but it really is just that they aren't romantically/sexually attracted to you. You can't fault them for that.
 

#HBC | Acrostic

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Well, what do you expect? I've already offered sex to one of you guys here (and am trying with one of the girls) and got turned down, so I'm putting up my walls! D:
Remember those walls I built.

If I don't see you as anything more than a friend, then I'm 95% of the time going to say "Let's just be friends okay?" That's what the friendzone is, nothing more, nothing less. A lot of people try to make it out to be this big conspiracy type of thing, but it really is just that they aren't romantically/sexually attracted to you. You can't fault them for that.
Wow she considers me a friend. This is great progress in my one-sided obsession. Soon I will have her, my precious.
 
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Holder of the Heel

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Well, what do you expect? I've already offered sex to one of you guys here (and am trying with one of the girls) and got turned down, so I'm putting up my walls! D:
You'll regret doing this to me. Before you come crawling back you should know that I've moved on. I deserve better than to be treated like this. T__T

GOODBYE!
 
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