Peppino Spaghetti //
bubbyboytoo
23/30
Creativity and Originality //
★★☆☆☆
Peppino doesn’t do anything particularly creative or original as your goal was to adapt Peppino into Smash by pulling exclusively from his Pizza Tower animations and techniques. You do however get a star for being the first Pizza Tower moveset in MYM, including a few new sub-mechanics like collateral damage, and being one of the very few MYMers to do Abyss Runes (since you created them). Still, like one who only got two slices of pizza at the pizza party, I’m left wanting more.
Organization //
★★★★☆
Peppino’s moveset is structured in a good way with ideas logically following each other and flowing into the next section well. You have effective use of paragraphs and images, and none of it is confusing. I found myself understanding the moveset quite well and found I could remember most of it after reading.
Voice and Writing Style //
★★★★☆
This is one of the strongest parts of the set, although your style lends it to most sets I read from you. It would be a 5 star but there are multiple times in the set where this gets dinged. A couple of runon sentences (Jab and Down Aerial), some spelling mistakes here and there (go-too and scarry), but mostly when you get to the Throws. You lack confidence and the complaints about writing throws comes off as negative. Even if you don’t feel confident in any part of the set, don’t tell the reader — fake it if you can, because if they believe you know what you’re doing or you’re having a good time, they will mirror you.
Presentation //
★★★★☆
While most of Peppino’s moveset is standard white text with no real innovation on the style since it’s your standard style, the inclusion of images and visual aids really helps the moveset and is such a good inclusion.
Audience and Respect //
★★★★★
Peppino is as long as he needs to be and respects the reader’s time well. Your style and substance provide the ideal kind of moveset for the average reader, helping them with visual aids, no-nonsense writing and length, and plenty of humor sprinkled in to keep it interesting and entertaining. Additionally, your use of table of contents, linking to the stage doc rather than inserting it into the set and taking up more length, and highlighting of certain key details helps further.
Personal Taste //
★★★★☆
I like Peppino’s character from a meme perspective even though I’ve never played Pizza Tower. A lot of the ideas presented within are pretty good too. I’m a fan of the Wario similarities, the movement-based Specials, and how you represented him in Smash by drawing from the Pizza Tower animations primarily. I also really like some of the changes in the Abyss Runes, such as superarmoring his dash. Some things I would have done differently though are focusing on movement tech in a game as movement-focused as Smash. He’s also admittedly struggling in the air, which doesn’t make a lot of sense to me as both a Smash perspective (aerial movement is super dynamic and integral to Smash gameplay) and Pizza Tower perspective (everything I’ve seen of the game has him floating and blitzing through the air in addition to running on the ground). So it balances out but is more on the side of my favor for this score.
Natsume Iroha //
Katapultar
23/30
Creativity and Originality //
★★★★☆
This is a take on the vehicle genre but a pretty innovative and good one. It doesn’t go absolutely buckwild with the creativity — such as including upgrades for the tank or even more absurd MYM nonsense — but what you have here is pretty creative and cool. I’m reminded also of Yui’s amplifier, one of my favorite constructs from you.
Organization //
★★★★☆
Iroha is mostly structured in a logical and memorable way, but the out-of-standard-order moves keep throwing me for a loop. I understand that you structured them that way so they could reference the previous moves in that input section but I am still used to the classic way of doing things. I also found myself having to go back and reread parts of moves.
Voice and Writing Style //
★★★★☆
Your voice is very strong and comes across as natural and easy to read, a testament to how far you’ve come as I remember some of your old sets being very dense and hard to parse. It’s not brimming with personality or humor, though, just a pretty good use of voice.
Presentation //
★★★★☆
Colors, fonts, and tables are used effectively here, although gray on red with white text isn’t the prettiest aesthetic to look at. You did make effort however, including a few pictures here and there. I would recommend messing around with custom page lengths however as many of the tables for the tank sections get cut in half by the end of the page.
Audience and Respect //
★★★☆☆
As per your usual standards, the moveset is long. This naturally led to me taking a while to read it. You do have a lot to say, of course, so that can’t be helped. This does lose a couple of stars though as I couldn’t stick with it all the way even when I was actively reading it — I tabbed out and checked other things due to my attention span not being captivated by the moveset.
Personal Taste //
★★★★☆
I’m not a Blue Archive fan, but I’m happy you’re enjoying the game so far, so the characterization isn’t going to win any favors for me. However, I’m pretty high on the ideas in the moveset as being able to summon and fight with a tank is super cool. I like your take on a vehicle set and it’s brimming with interaction and has a big playground vibe to it, even reminding me some of Vulture, a set from Kupa I liked. I also as mentioned before liked Yui’s amplifier so this scratches the same kind of itch. Still, the tank and all you can do for it gets big props from me.
Kasen Ibaraki //
OldManHan
24/30
Creativity and Originality //
★★★☆☆
There’s some interesting stuff going on with the True Form and the Down Special but it’s nothing too new or mindblowing. To be fair what is here is pretty neat, especially for someone who’s a relative outsider to MYM. The highlight for me is definitely the True Form Down Special.
Organization //
★★★★★
I’m really on-board with how you’ve presented your ideas here, especially the frame data, how the True Form is presented relative to the rest of the moveset’s ideas, and how you explain how the moveset evolved from its original state.
Voice and Writing Style //
★★★★★
You have a very strong voice and explain things to the reader in your own way, and it’s immediately clear what your intent is. It’s very pleasant to read and understand, and there’s some humor and plenty of personality sprinkled in.
Presentation //
★★★☆☆
The colors and images are a good start, but it’s a very standard presentation. 48 pages of black Arial text isn’t the most interesting thing to look at, and I’m not a fan of it all being centered despite you admitting that is just your style.
Audience and Respect //
★★★★☆
This moveset is basically as long as the last moveset I read, Iroha, but I didn’t find myself tuning out nearly as much. It kept me pretty interested and captivated and was very easy to read. It still is quite a long read, but the moveset is broken up I think in a way that you can take a break after her normal form and come back and read the True Form in one go as well.
Personal Taste //
★★★★☆
The character gets no points from me due to me not being a Touhou fan but I like a bunch of the ideas here. The swiftness of the normal form reminds me a lot of Sheik mixed with Chun-Li and feels like it would be fun to play, and True Form breathes power with its Smashes alone. The True Form Down Special and Skeletons are two things I really adore with this set and I’m a fan of.
Flandre Scarlet //
GolisoPower
&
Arctic Tern
21/30
Creativity and Originality //
★★★★☆
Flandre has a lot going on with all of these wild projectile and disjointed hitboxes, true to a bullet hell character. The moveset feels like a quilt of very different ideas stitched together — in a way, I’m reminded of KingK.Rool’s Gengar. It’s bursting with creative energy, but I feel like it also works to the movesets detriment when it’s very hard to parse what’s going on and how it thematically ties together to feel less than organic.
Organization //
★★★☆☆
You’re trying to put forth some effort with how the data is presented here which is a good thing, with the frame data in particular being represented by a more visual aid. I’m a big fan of the elevator pitches right at the start of each move. Due to the moveset’s frenetic nature it’s a bit of a struggle for me to remember what’s going on though and trying to juggle all of these ideas in my head. So some really good ideas get brought down by others negative points for me to balance out.
Voice and Writing Style //
★★★★☆
The voice utilized has some evident personality going on with anecdotes and a pretty pleasant-to-read style when I am understanding the ideas presented. Surprisingly however I can’t tell who wrote what with this joint set, save for a couple of times where it’s actually noted by the specific author. In the future, I’d give joint sets a higher score if both writers’ voices are distinct and able to be picked apart so it feels more collaborative.
Presentation //
★★★★☆
The use of colors, formatting, and images take this a big step up from the average moveset but it isn’t spectacular. As mentioned before, there’s some clear effort being shown here but it’s also very recognizable as deviating from Goliso’s standard template.
Audience and Respect //
★★★☆☆
The moveset is pretty meaty in length but not brain-busting — I only got distracted a couple of times but returned to finish it. There’s no second form or anything to have to take in halfway through. However, I found the moveset hard to follow at times with so much wild stuff going on. Additionally, the moveset heavily relies on the audience being familiar with her appearances in Touhou to really understand the moveset. Even with .GIFs, a lot of the time I had to watch them multiple times to figure out exactly what part the attack was pulling from.
Personal Taste //
★★★☆☆
While a lot of the moveset is very cool, the moveset being composed of so many different competiting ideas — and aesthetics, from differently-colored orbs to crystals and more — kind of turned me off from being completely on-board with it. The stuff I did really like I wish would have been the main “creative” focus of the set, such as the moveset’s centerpiece just being the cage or clones or destruction orb tagging. When you have to try to juggle all of these, it gets a little too much.
Rumia //
U
UserShadow7989
21/30
Creativity and Originality //
★★★☆☆
There’s nothing new under the sun (pun intended) but Rumia utilizes MYM smokescreens in a way that fits her intended role and tries to make it function as a very humble slot in her arsenal. The moves are very functional and all feel organic, with nothing too crazy going on.
Organization //
★★★★☆
The ideas present in the moveset are arranged in a very clean and logical way, with them building on each other and mostly making sense throughout. There will be times where a move will reference a move we haven’t gotten to yet and you’ll have to put a pin in it but my comprehension of the moveset doesn’t hinge on knowing everything at all times. One thing I do really like here and there are how you’ll explain function, such as you mentioning Grab’s OOS purpose compared to the other moves in the set.
Voice and Writing Style //
★★★★☆
Your voice is present with a very professional and knowledgeable style. There is the stray spelling mistake (platry) but I found the moveset fairly easy to read. It isn’t brimming with personality but it suits the moveset.
Presentation //
★★☆☆☆
There isn’t a presentation style as it is just a step up above unformatted, all-white text. It’s fine to look at but it gets no favor in this category.
Audience and Respect //
★★★★★
I found Rumia fairly easy and pleasant to read, being just as long as it needs to be. Topics are handled and explained well and I didn’t need to on Touhou knowledge to appreciate what was going on here — she could have easily been Darkness Witch Rumia, for instance. That being said, the darkness is actually quite underplayed here with it really being on two moves, I would have liked for it to be leaned into more.
Personal Taste //
★★★☆☆
I’m pretty neutral on Rumia. She does some cool stuff I liked with playing around the concealing orb but nothing wowed me. She was to me just a pretty earnest moveset and your standard style of set. I didn’t feel like I wasted my time reading her but it also wasn’t exciting — I hope that doesn’t come off as negative! I’m hoping your next set will have some wow factor that will impress me.
Goobbue //
majora_787
15/30
Creativity and Originality //
★☆☆☆☆
We’ve seen form-changing movesets before, even forms dependent on how much damage the character has taken, but unfortunately Goobbue doesn’t do anything novel or interesting with the concept, even though he’s very cute. Sorry, Goobbue. The attacks themselves also aren’t very interesting, it pains me to say.
Organization //
★★★★☆
There is a consistent logic to the moves throughout, with you presenting the moves and then presenting how the alternate forms change them or make them stronger. This is very good. There are a few issues (pummel being at the end of the grab game (???) and down tilt just straight up ending abruptly) but otherwise the organization is good.
Voice and Writing Style //
★★☆☆☆
While the moveset does have a mostly neutral voice with your personality not really apparent — save for a couple of funny moments early on in the moveset — the set unfortunately comes off as dry at times due to the amount of short, matter-of-fact sentences. I was expecting you to have a lot more fun with the character! Still, it’s not too bad.
Presentation //
★★★★★
The presentation here is actually quite nice! The use of colors, formatting, and fonts all tie together for a very pleasant moveset to look at. Some more images might be better but this is definitely the best-looking moveset so far. One small note — the Neutral Special inexplicably has different formatting than the rest of the text.
Audience and Respect //
★★☆☆☆
While the moveset is quite short, this isn’t a case of the moveset being as long as it needs to be — in fact, it is much shorter than I’d like. In a moveset with two alternate forms, the attacks need at minimum a paragraph dedicated to how each form changes over each attack. As it is, it leaves me wanting much more.
Personal Taste //
★☆☆☆☆
I wish I could like the set, I really do, considering this is your first set in ages and I was very happy to see you return. I’ll consider this just you dipping your toes in the water. I hope you get struck by some inspiration and make something that really excites me because I’d love to see you get back in the groove of things!
Dizzy //
Arctic Tern
24/30
Creativity and Originality //
★★★★☆
Dizzy is a faithful translation of her source moves and abilities, with the Tension/Roman Cancels being introduced as a cool and interesting take on spendable meter in MYM. The bulk of the moveset is carried by Roman Cancels, but it’s a very fitting thing to focus on from a MYM perspective and keeps the moveset fresh with something to talk about on each move.
Organization //
★★★★☆
The organization is fairly standardized with you explaining the move, then playstyle applications and/or Roman Cancel applications. As such, it’s not too confusing and everything is laid out in a logical way as one would expect. I do wish you would utilize the outline table of contents however as a way of easily being able to jump to different inputs given the moveset is very long.
Voice and Writing Style //
★★★★☆
Your voice is mostly neutral and professional but with moments of excitement bursting through and reminding the reader of the author behind the moveset. As such, it’s a fairly good use of voice. Additionally, your style is very knowledgeable and explains everything in an understandable way.
Presentation //
★★★★☆
The presentation here is very standard, although blue text isn’t that much better than white text other than the aesthetic. I would recommend including some white and gray text, and even colored text matching the Roman Cancel types mentioned. This does however get a bump for having images of each thing the attacks are based on.
Audience and Respect //
★★★★☆
This is a very long moveset which makes for a daunting read, but the bulk of Dizzy are technical details, interactions, and playstyle applications — intricate stuff that can be read later if you just want to get the gist of what’s going on. The images certainly help, plus Dizzy focuses mostly on Tension as the main mechanic making things not too confusing for the reader. The playstyle sections also help (I like the mini one at the end of the specials, for instance).
Personal Taste //
★★★★☆
Dizzy is a solidly good set! I liked her a lot, despite not being too familiar with her or Guilty Gear. She has a pretty cool mechanical toy to focus on and everything tends to come together despite the myriad of things she can throw out. The fire/ice duality is obviously something I dig, and the playstyle seems really fun as a translation of an existing fighter but feeling very natural in Smash. I can see why you’re such a prominent new MYMer, good work.
Patchouli Knowledge //
Arctic Tern
27/30
Creativity and Originality //
★★★★★
Patchy is an incredibly creative set just from the Neutral Special alone but the way so much of her kit revolves around that Neutral Special and plays into her zoning playstyle, such as Up Tilt’s defensive role, makes the set truly tie together. It’s not too confusing or overwhelming either, as everything has its own well-defined purpose.
Organization //
★★★★☆
More than Dizzy, this moveset would benefit from a table of contents in the outline with the attack names. A lot of the moves in this set reference a previous move by name rather than input, like the Neutral Special combos. With so many combos and moves, it’s much harder to remember all of this info, so being able to quickly jump back to them would be great. Other than that, this moveset’s organization is basically the same as Dizzy, which was good.
Voice and Writing Style //
★★★★☆
Your voice and style is the same as before, with not much changed. I did appreciate the Araki-esque explanations in the moves such as what phlogiston is and what a fire devil is — that was pretty entertaining.
Presentation //
★★★★☆
The presentation doesn’t diverge much from Dizzy before it, save for the sections being colored. While this is a good improvement, it’s just “good”. There is a major issue though: a lot of moves are missing their gifs! I hope you’ll go back and add them in, as I assume you rushed it out for opening day.
Audience and Respect //
★★★★★
While Patchouli is very long, the moveset doesn’t feel that way with it keeping me hooked and everything neatly — and logically — sectioned off. You effectively describe what it does and what niche it fills then move on to the next exciting move. Naturally, this keeps the reader engaged as they want to see what else the moveset has in store. You also explain a lot of stuff the moveset references in layman's terms, which is a big plus.
Personal Taste //
★★★★★
Patchouli is my favorite set so far with it’s very cool NSpec play. I’m reminded a lot of a moveset from Junahu called Arche Klein that I enjoyed quite a lot, so this hits all the right buttons for me. Almost every attack in the set is flashy and looks like it would feel so good to play.
Jonathan Joestar //
BrazilianGuy
15/30
Creativity and Originality //
★★☆☆☆
The moveset’s ideas, while simple and fitting for Jonathan, don’t do anything wild. This doesn’t necessarily mean they’re bad though, just that nothing in it wowed me or was new territory. Using hamon charges to cancel hamon-related moves was a good start! With more ideas like that, it would have scored higher here.
Organization //
★★★★☆
The moveset is structured in a logical way, with your frame data and damage being shown at the end. That’s a step up from the average moveset, so nice job. I also am a big fan of you reminding the reader of what the hamon-related moves can cancel into periodically.
Voice and Writing Style //
★★☆☆☆
If I remember correctly, English isn’t your first language, so I’ll try not to be too harsh on you here, but it does need to be stated there are numerous grammar mistakes present throughout. Your voice is present though as your casual, laid-back style does have some charm. That being said, the grammar is the main thing bringing this down and running your work by a friend who could help edit the moveset prior to posting would do you favors.
Presentation //
★★☆☆☆
The presentation is standard but not terrible to look at, with some images (and humorous artistic recreations) sprinkled in there. Unfortunately, as I mentioned in my Kasen comment, I’m not a fan of completely centered text. The headers are also not uniform; half of the aerials are “Fair” and “Bair” while the other half are “Up Air” and “Down Air”. Like I said, proofreading from a third party could help with this.
Audience and Respect //
★★★☆☆
Jonathan isn’t long at all, giving the reader a nice casual experience to read. I do feel like Jonathan is missing something as I was expecting more as a Jonathan fan, although what that is I don’t know exactly. Also, for the non-JoJo fans, I would recommend actually putting some of his feats and history in his bio. Perhaps explain it how Speedwagon would to the uninitiated.
Personal Taste //
★★☆☆☆
What you have here is a plenty serviceable moveset for Jonathan, and I’m a fan of how you’ve handled how hamon works here. However, on the most part, the moveset didn’t blow me away. I think as you read movesets and develop your ideas and writing you can write even stronger works and put out something that will truly impress me. I’ll keep my eyes on you.
Nonon Jakuzure //
Slavic
27/30
Creativity and Originality //
★★★★☆
The moveset’s main playstyle core established in the Specials that all connect together and play off of each other and the normals is a pretty original one to me, although I assume someone’s done “freezing projectiles in midair” before — I’ve actually got a couple with this idea in the works, although not like Nonon does by any means. I’m still giving it a pretty good score here as it’s very interesting to imagine depending on the matchup,
especially MYM26 matchups with all these Touhou gals running around.
Organization //
★★★★★
The moveset is organized in a very effective manner, with the section order changed up for very specific reasons you state. I was initially dubious of the Smashes being at the end, but the Down Smash sold me on it. Additionally, highlighting the start of each paragraph was a
bold but good choice, it helps draw the reader’s attention to the ideas and keeps them memorable.
Voice and Writing Style //
★★★★★
The writing is easy-to-read, friendly, approachable, and informative, and definitely funny at times. Hallmarks of your style, of course. Full marks for the student moveset.
Presentation //
★★★★★
Definitely the best-looking moveset I’ve read so far, the colors, formatting, and images all combine for an aesthetically pleasing and fitting moveset to look at. Nice job!
Audience and Respect //
★★★★☆
The moveset’s long but not too long, although after getting to the unfinished end (you had to work, of course) I am left wanting more and for you to go back and fill it out, unless you’re trapped in the Taco Bell dimension in which case I would kindly ask for at least a Baja Blast green alt costume.
Personal Taste //
★★★★☆
I like most of the ideas here! It was very fun reading one of your sets after not doing so for so long. I do wish there were a little more projectiles for you to play around with (and a baton-twirling NAir rather than the (although serviceable) existing NAir) but as it is there’s some fun potential here. Well done, and I’m happy you got out another set for your favorite anime.
Axel Stone //
Perkilator
11/30
Creativity and Originality //
★☆☆☆☆
Axel’s moveset is as basic as it gets for a punch-kick man. There is a brief glimmer of something to play around with in the meter mechanic, but it ends up being a relative footnote.
Organization //
★★★☆☆
The moveset’s organization is pretty standard, with it being ordered logically and is easy to follow along and understand what the moveset’s trying to do. A small strange choice is the Aerials section being out of order but it’s a minor complaint.
Voice and Writing Style //
★★☆☆☆
The moveset’s writing style and voice are as neutral as it gets, making it easy to read, but the moveset is also severely underdetailed.
Presentation //
★★☆☆☆
Axel is mostly black text on white background which is as basic as it comes, but you do get a point for including some pictures to visualize the specials and Final Smash. You also use effective formatting for the headers. I’m not a fan of the all-centered text though.
Audience and Respect //
★★☆☆☆
It’s a very short read, and while the ideas are very simple so you don’t need to go too in-depth on them this is a case of the moveset needing much more meat on its bones to contend with the other movesets in the contest. Like Goobbue, I’m left feeling disappointed by how brief of a moveset it is. Compare to Terry; you could have done much more.
Personal Taste //
★☆☆☆☆
Unfortunately, I wasn’t on-board with Axel. I would recommend checking out some of the other fighting game-based movesets in our modern contests and even doing research on Terry in Smash to see what you could have done to take Axel to further levels. I understand if that’s not the kind of vibe you’re going for, though. I hope you improve from here and look forward to seeing further movesets from you!
Cu Chulainn //
n88
25/30
Creativity and Originality //
★★★★☆
Chulainn’s fairly standard moveset is spiced up by various strange gimmicks, making it a very unusual but nevertheless creative moveset. You could have easily made him just a standard spear-wielder but there’s a little something unique on most moves.
Organization //
★★★★★
I’m a big fan of how you lay out the ideas in the moveset, breaking them down into bite-sized paragraphs and then laying out the data at the end with some commentary on it to boot.
Voice and Writing Style //
★★★★☆
Your professional and knowledgeable style has various moments where defined personality breaks through, giving the moveset a clear voice. Sometimes the sentence structure appears strange and requires me to reread it to make sure I understood it correctly, but on the whole it’s a good style.
Presentation //
★★★★☆
The moveset is pretty nice to look at, with great use of purple and white plus formatting to tie into an aesthetically-pleasing moveset. I like the use of an almost white gray to make the actually white bolded text pop more. There are a few images as well.
Audience and Respect //
★★★★★
The moveset is not too short but not too long, sitting at a perfect length for the ideas present. Your use of bold to guide the reader along as well as explaining some interesting stuff not just in the playstyle but how the moveset conceptually fits the lore of the character is excellent.
Personal Taste //
★★★☆☆
There’s some cool and interesting ideas present in such a simple set, such as the interplay with various buffs. I’m not sure it’s entirely my tempo, but I appreciate a good spear-wielding playstyle. On a whole, a refreshing palate cleanser of a moveset and I’m always pleased to read an n88 set.
Petra Macneary //
FrozenRoy
25/30
Creativity and Originality //
★★★★☆
Hunted is the big mechanic this moveset hinges around, with it giving each move fairly substantial buffs and various interesting changes to aid her playstyle. The smartness of how these buffs benefit Petra on the individual move basis as well as the larger playstyle implications give it a good score. Additionally, your translation of her skills from Fire Emblem while feeling like natural Smash moves is something you did a good job on.
Organization //
★★★★☆
The moveset is organized fairly logically within each move, with you describing the move and then the Hunted boons, plus all the various confirms and playstyle applications. What I don’t quite understand is your logic to how the moves are ordered within the sections or why Grab Game comes much earlier, but it doesn’t really hurt the moveset besides me having to go back and make sure I’m on the right input.
Voice and Writing Style //
★★★★★
Your style is very much the same with an informative and knowledgeable voice that’s very easy to follow along with. It’s not bursting with humor or anything but it’s your established successful voice.
Presentation //
★★★☆☆
If anything remains constant, it’s your (solo) works’ presentation. It is what it is, although I will remark that Petra would benefit much more from .gifs of the attacks from Three Houses you reference; as someone who’s never played, just saying it looks like that does nothing for me since I can’t visualize it in my head and I’m not going to go look up a video on it. To balance that out, you get a point for the section headers being cute.
Audience and Respect //
★★★★★
I can’t check the word count but the moveset feels like what you’d expect from a Froy set that doesn’t do outrageous interactions on each input, although each move does basically have two parts unless it’s like, Forward Smash which has its own choice tree branching off of it. You do the audience a big service however by explaining the playstyle in an easy to understand manner that makes it an enjoyable read.
Personal Taste //
★★★★☆
I was initially very neutral on the set with it just being very serviceable to me, although I’ve never played Fire Emblem. I think Forward Smash was where it really swayed my opinion in favor of the set, and I was really impressed how it all tied together, especially on moves like Up Aerial. I was a little disappointed when it abruptly stopped at the end of the throws, but considering it was squeezed in there at the last minute opening day I understand. Nice job.
Bowstring //
majora_787
21/30
Creativity and Originality //
★★★☆☆
While the moveset doesn’t do anything particularly new or innovative, the mechanics paint a portrait of the character driving the moveset and it’s clear you’re trying to do interesting things with him. My concern mostly is that the mechanics are more separate but equal tools rather than playing off of each other more — such as Courage merely increasing the amount of arrows rather than directly altering how the elements function — but it’s still fine.
Organization //
★★★★☆
While Bowstring’s organization is fairly standard, the effective use of how the moves play with the mechanics at hand is a nice way to organize the moveset’s ideas. I wish you would go more in-depth on playstyle, adding more meat to the moveset, but what you’re comfortable with writing is up to you and not that much a negative.
Voice and Writing Style //
★★☆☆☆
Your style is very neutral and easy to read, but lacks flavor or prominent use of voice. Additionally, I found some moves repetitive in nature, such as the smashes all having “Bowstring stashes his one-handed crossbows away and draws his much heftier Element-Bow in both hands in a noticeably long startup” at the start of them.
Presentation //
★★★★★
Even more than Goobbue, Bowstring is a very nice moveset to look at with very effective use of color, formatting, and Google Docs. It could be better with images, of course, but considering this is an OC for a tabletop campaign we’re not getting that unless you commission art for a moveset.
Audience and Respect //
★★★★☆
There’s a lot more here than Goobbue while feeling like the same easy to read — a clear improvement. As I mentioned before though, I’m still looking for more from you, but I think this was a good start. The moveset doesn’t go too far into playstyle specifics which is something you can improve on, for instance. Also, the moveset describes Bowstring as having heels, does this mean he doesn’t have talons? Minor thing, but it did come to mind.
Personal Taste //
★★★☆☆
All-in-all, I’m pretty neutral on Bowstring, but enjoyed it much more than Goobbue. A more promising sign of movesets from you to come as long as you keep improving on your work. Nice job.
Isaac Clarke //
Shad0takU
21/30
Creativity and Originality //
★★☆☆☆
Isaac’s a pretty standard zoner, not doing anything too special considering it’s mostly just a good translation of him into Smash. So I wasn’t expecting a lot, but I do wish you would have done some more interesting things with either stasis, kinesis, or his weapons’ focus on shooting specific limbs; maybe a targeted sweetspot system? It would make a lot of sense for an arsenal fighter to be precision based. The rig extra is pretty nifty though.
Organization //
★★★★☆
Moving Specials up because they’re playstyle relevant is something MYMers learned a long time ago, I hope you move to doing it for all of your movesets (usually newcomers from other moveset communities put Specials last). The hover impacting the aerials with them coming earlier in the moveset makes sense as well. As far as detail, of course Isaac could be meatier if you tried going in-depth into playstyle and move interactions.
Voice and Writing Style //
★★★★★
Excellent use of voice as it comes through clearly and even made me laugh at times, and your writing style is pretty easy to understand. Great job.
Presentation //
★★★★★
Excellent job on the presentation from start to finish. It’s got some effort put into it and fits Isaac well. Two points I have against it that aren’t impactful are, of course, me hating it being all-centered, and the fact that Orbitron is kind of an annoying font to read in body text (still fine in headers).
Audience and Respect //
★★★☆☆
The moveset is fine how it is but definitely could be longer, especially if you crank up the creativity on the moveset as a whole (with three games under his belt and a whole arsenal of space tech plus gameplay that’s more tactical than your average FPS he doesn’t deserve to be a cookie cutter zoner). I would also add more of a description of the Jab’s animation; you don’t actually describe what the attack looks like other than it’s the Dead Space “one-two” so MYMers who’ve never played won’t be familiar.
Personal Taste //
★★☆☆☆
I ended up being a little disappointed Isaac didn’t do more, as he ends up feeling like a missed opportunity. Of course, that’s just me talking; I feel like someone who’s not a Dead Space fan would feel differently, as paradoxically while they wouldn't fully understand the references they wouldn't know what he
could have done better. So it's more of me having higher expectations for it so I'm a little harsher. I did appreciate all the references though and think the moveset’s a pretty faithful and serviceable representation of him in Smash! Looking forward to your other ventures.