A Cacophony of Poems So Immense It May or May Not Blow Your Mind (Probably Yes)

[Venom Dream]

An Introduction (Fit for Monarchs, Sitting Upon Their Gilded Thrones As They Gaze Upon The Land That, In A Way, They Are Upon; Unless they are Flying or Underwater) To True Ways of Thinking: Through Dark Poetry - OR Truth

As fellow artists, with intellectual capacity above that of the average, un-enlightened fool (****ing simpletons), I'm sure you can all agree with me that the problems in society today mostly stem from a lack of Dark Poetry in that Society. Dark Poetry is the only true way to express ones true emotions, to truly show the world how much we, in truth, want to kill ourselves and get over with this useless life, possibly escaping this mortal coil (but we cannot, for we must enlighten the rest of the world) ect.. So, in the interests of humanity, I have created a series of Dark Poetry, written to stir the very mind, to move the very soul, and to be appreciated by those that truely understand art. Truthfully.

Read on, my good friends, if you are brave enough, if you have not been hypnotized by the black void that is the media, school, the government, all institutions of all kinds, and all forms of technology (including the technology I am using right now, and really anything with Microchips in them. I am truly enlightened towards the inner workings and conspiracies of Microchips). Throw down your shackles and follow me into a land of Dark Poetry created for you, those who know the truth.


The Government
Two White Pixies with Lightbulbs,
Walrus a Bathtub,
They have tireswings in the front yard...
This is Why The Government is Corrupt.

Ode to the Bright Green Leaf of Life that Gives Us Life and Otherwise Death (Unless We Are Alive, In Which Case We are Not Dead) Part I
Leafs like Chocolate.
I eat them.
I feel the cold death of myself as the icing slips down my face.
Ode to the Bright Green Leaf of Life that Gives Us Life and Otherwise Death (Unless We Are Alive, In Which Case We are Not Dead) Part II
There are trees in the hills...
Trees... they want to kill me, they want to eat me...
TREEEEEEEEES!!

How Many Licks Does It Take God to Get to the Centre of the Universe?
One...
Two...
Three...
Four...
Oh, **** it, I'm just going to bite the ****ed thing.
(AAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!)


A Followup to the Ode to The Green Leaf of Life... ect., OR Please With Peanut Butter and Sparkly Sparkles on Top!!/I Like Peanut Butter and Sparkly Sparkles on Top!!
Lets all have a sprinkle of toffee,
On our coffee-bleeding wrists.

So I Was...
... Walking Down the Stairs
... ... ... ... ... ... When Suddenly
BAMM!!
Gonorrhea!

I hope you all enjoyed being enlightened by the truth. I will continue to enlighten with the truth, my good friends, and I encourage you to join me!!

 

[demoncaterpie]

This is way too awesome for words.

Here's my entry.

The Words of A Lost Sage Sinking in a Bowl of Soup

I am he
You are he
He is soup
I am soup
I am CRACKER!!!

 

[Venom Dream]

I am glad for your enthusiasm, fellow Enlightened poetry writer. I see that, although I'm probably still superiour intellectually to everyone else in the World, perhaps not by as big a polarity as I perhaps imagined.

For you, I've prepared a short biography of my childhood, as read by a god/dog hybrid watching me from inside my television.

Childhood from the Eyes of a God/Dog Hybrid That Watched Me From My Television

Between the blackened edges of my confined cage, many years ago, I often saw a young man through that blurred glass screen that mostly impaired my vision. I saw a handsome little boy, intelegent, charming, modest, perfect in every imaginable away. During his childhood, he obsessed over the superficial ways of living. But, soon he would become enlightened. One day, after a session of water polo and hawking (at which he was amazing and completely blew away all competitors)...
Hold on, I need to scratch behind my ear. ****ed fleas.

Anyways, this young man picked up a book called A Scathing Political Commentary, and his life was forever changed. He became enlightened when he realized the concpiracies of the government and society to force him to conform, to become just another brick in the wall. He became an existentialist, which he proudly shouted out to the world while he unwitting watched me (i.e. his Television). He enjoyed The Simpsons, if I remember correctly.

Sure, he was shunned by all of his friends, but it didn't matter to him anymore. He typed up Dark Poetry on his computer, in order to impress others and bring them to his side, proclaiming his existentialist ways.
He is a genius. I am quiet fond of him. And bones. Mmmm, bones...

 

[demoncaterpie]

It is true, Venom Dream, that your intelligence knows no bounds. But let my pitiful maggot body at leat attempt to climb the Mountain of Acceptance, so I may bask in the shining light of your glory.

What I present is the introduction to a novel entitled The Greatest Novel of All Time: An Explanation As To Why The Book In Your Hands is The Greatest Novel of All Time. If I were to post the entirety of the piece, it would surely cause the unintiated to melt away from the inside with a passion only exhibited by those who have found God, with a possible brain explosion on the side. But enough of my jabber, here is the holy piece that all seek, but few find.

The Introduction to the Greatest Novel of All Time: An Explanation As To Why The Book In Your Hands is The Greatest Novel of All Time.

It is true that many books claim to be the Greatest Novel of All Time, but how many books can actually say that as a fact. The Answer: One. The World can only have one Greatest Novel of All Time, for anymore then that would surely cause the universe to collapse on itself.

Described in this most sacred of objects is all the reasons why this unearthly grouping of papers far exceeds any other grouping of papers, including Chapter One: This Novel is The Greatest Novel of All Time Because it is Accepted by Harvard and Chapter Five: This Novel is The Greatest Novel of All Time Because When I Wrote it, I Saw a Lamb Give Birth to a Goat, and it Would be Quite a Stretch to Say That That Does Not Qualify This Book as The Greatest Novel of All Time. And of course, we must not forget the fan favorite Chapter Twelve: This Novel is The Greatest Novel of All Time Because This Novel Can Fit Into the Trunk of a Tree, Which is Undeniable Proof That the Only Reason this World Was Created Was So it Could be Compatiable With This Book, Which is The Greatest Novel of All Time.

But, alas, I must warn the reader of the dangers behind this book. If one is not ready to experience the greatest thing ever concieved by the Universe, he or she may experience a genetical equivalent to the Big Bang. I, nor the publication, is responsible for any molecular changes that may result in a person's body after reading The Greatest Novel of All Time.

So, daring reader, if you are ready to experience the equivalent of The Tree of Knowledge compined with one billion Nuclear Explosions, then turn the page at your own risk.

 

[De_Le_Chozo]

Oh dear lord, this is so random and quirky. . . I LOVE IT!! Originality in every sentence! Incredibly long titles! Arrogance balanced by outlandish humor! YES! "The Green Leaf of Life"? "White Pixies with Lightbulbs"?? "The Tree of Knowledge combined with one billion Nuclear Explosions."??? "BAMM! GONNORRHEA!"???? GENIUS!
I Can Only Wish in My Heartiest and Blood-Pumpiest of Hearts To Reach the Point At Which Your Big Toe Meets Your Shin, O Great Demonic Caterpie and Venomic Dream. Either That or Your Feetiest and Smelliest of Feet O Great Two!
The Holy Chocolate shaped in the form of O Great Venomic Dream's feet. . .
You must take it soon or else the Holy Guardians of Myth will arise and beat
you down with their Holy Purses filled with Holy Bricks in the shape of
Demonic Caterpie's Biggest and Crustiest of Toes! Quickly! Quickly!
But then. . .
Amnesiac blood cookie belt!

 

[WaterTails]

I am glad for your enthusiasm, fellow Enlightened poetry writer. I see that, although I'm probably still superiour intellectually to everyone else in the World, perhaps not by as big a polarity as I perhaps imagined.

you spelled superior wrong... I think!

Oh the irony!

 

[Venom Dream]

I Can Only Wish in My Heartiest and Blood-Pumpiest of Hearts To Reach the Point At Which Your Big Toe Meets Your Shin, O Great Demonic Caterpie and Venomic Dream. Either That or Your Feetiest and Smelliest of Feet O Great Two!
The Holy Chocolate shaped in the form of O Great Venomic Dream's feet. . .
You must take it soon or else the Holy Guardians of Myth will arise and beat
you down with their Holy Purses filled with Holy Bricks in the shape of
Demonic Caterpie's Biggest and Crustiest of Toes! Quickly! Quickly!
But then. . .
Amnesiac blood cookie belt!

I don't think you realize how serious this business is. To truly grasp dark poetry, I strongly suggest you spend a larger amount of time viewing it before posting so as to not make a noobie mistake that we will all laugh at.

you spelled superior wrong... I think!

No, I didn't. In dark poetry, words are often spelled differently to look more dark. I like to call it, "Real Talk". See the above comment about viewing more poetry of the dark variety before posting, please.

And, now, more work from your beloved master of dark poetry

I Was Dead For Quite Some Time Before I Realized I Actually Wasn't Dead At All
I was deaed...
But, I wasn't...
I WAS DEAD! (Oh, woe)
Oh, wait, no I'm not...
OH CONFUSING WORLD LET ME GOOOOO! (Oh, woe)
You brand your hellish brand on my porcelain skin,
And now I don't know which world I fit in.
OH HELL!! (Oh, woe is me!)