GEORGE_ZIMMER
Smash Rookie
- Joined
- Aug 12, 2007
- Messages
- 2
HI, I'M GEORGE ZIMMER, CEO AND FOUNDER OF MEN'S WEARHOUSE. I AM THE GREATEST SMASH PLAYER THIS WORLD HAS EVER KNOWN. I WILL CONQUER THE SINNERS THAT SURREPTITIOUSLY STOLE THE TITLE OF THE "BEST". THE FIRST CONQUEST WILL BE KOREAN DJ, A BETRAYER OF HIS BLOOD. HIS RACE SHOULD STAVE OFF THE SUPERLATIVE URGE TO SUCCEED AT SMASH AND SURRENDER THEIR STALWART SKILL TO THE SCI-FI SINGLE, STARCRAFT. I WILL NOT TOLERATE THE TARES OF HIS TELOS AND TURN HIM TOTALLY USING MY TORRID TIGRESS-TICKLER. THE SECOND CONQUEST WILL BE MEW2KING, THE USURPER OF THE THRONE. HIS HORRIBLE HUBRIS WILL HEAR HORROR AS I SHOW HIM TO THE HOUNDS OF HADES, FOR I AM OF THE REAL ROYAL LINE OF MEWTWO, MY RETICENT READER. MY THIRD CONQUEST WILL BE THE PANDERER CHU DAT. FOR HIM TO GAIN SUCH SKILL AND STAY SEXY, HE MUST HAVE SORDIDLY SOLD HIS SOUL TO A SUCCUBI. HIS CHERUBIC, CHILDLIKE CLIMBERS WILL CHOKE ON MY CHORIZO AS I CHORTLE AT HIS CHAGRIN. MY FINAL CONQUEST WILL BE PC CHRIS, THE DECEIVER. PC DOES NOT STAND FOR THE PUBLICLY ACCEPTED "POLITICALLY CORRECT" OR "PERSONAL COMPUTER", LEADING LOVING LOOKERS OF SMASH TO BELLIGERENTLY BELIEVE THAT PC CHRIS IS EITHER MILD-MANNERED OR TECH-SAVVY, OF WHICH HE IS NEITHER. I WILL FELL HIS FLAGRANT FAST-FALLING FELONIES WITH MY FLUCTUATING FORGER OF FERVENT FEMININE FEELINGS. WHAT KINGLY CHARACTER DO I MASQUERADE AS, YOU ASK? WHY NONE OTHER THAN THE LASCIVIOUS LORD OF LICENTIOUSNESS, LUIGI. HIS TITANIC TESTICULAR TYRANNY IS SHOWN BY HIS SHFFGDGF (short hop fast fall gravity-defying green fireball). GREAT ENOUGH IS HIS GREGARIOUSNESS THAT HE GATHERS GLEEFUL GAWKERS SO THAT THEY MAY BE BEFUDDLED BY MY BALL-BUSTING BARRAGE. ALSO, THE SPACE ANIMALS ARE ***GOTS. I GUARANTEE IT.
